Transformers headcannons/bloopers/oneshots (CLOSED)

Basically Optimus x everyone (-bee and hound)

Thank you AO3 for the lovely idea of Cade experiencing his first team wide heat cycle lmao
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Cade did not expect to wake up to obscene noises coming from behind his barn, nor did he expect Crosshairs to be fucking riding Optimus Prime...

He has never done a 180 so fast in his life before, getting his ass outta there. As if that wasn't bad enough, he once again heard noises and naturally went to look to see Drift, the calm samurai begging Prime to go faster. Cade was so confused he didn't even try to explain this, was it a dominating ritual? Was Prime showing the team who's leader while helping boost morale?? Cade didn't even bother when he heard noises for the last time, knowing someone (probably Ironhide or Ratchet) was getting railed by the leader. Luckily Sarah was at university and Shane had no reason to visit anymore so neither of them got to experience this weird event. Cade did notice that the 'bots were behaving better, specifically Crosshairs, after their time so he thought it must be a dominating ritual. Cade also noticed other things, like the 'bots fighting for Optimus' attention now which he found amusing. Drift was also more clingy in a way which Cade called simple "fucking needs" which Optimus huffed at but didn't deny. Cade laughed when it was over, after a week of him not venturing near the barn left him wondering why he even let these things live with him. As Cade processed what he had witnessed, he couldn't help but feel a mixture of confusion, amusement, and a touch of discomfort. He had always known that the Autobots had their own unique way of interacting with each other, but he had never expected to see them engaging in such intimate acts. Still, he couldn't deny that the behavior seemed to have a positive effect on their morale and behavior. The 'bots seemed more focused and determined, and even Crosshairs, who had always been a bit of a loose cannon, seemed more disciplined and loyal to Optimus. As the days passed, Cade tried to ignore the sounds and movements coming from behind the barn, but he couldn't help but feel a bit curious about the dynamics between the Autobots. He wondered if this was a common practice among their kind, or if it was something unique to this group. Despite his discomfort, however, Cade couldn't deny that he had grown to care for these strange, alien creatures. They had become a part of his life, and he couldn't imagine living without them. As he looked out at the barn, he saw Optimus emerge, his frame gleaming in the sunlight. The Autobot leader looked over at Cade, his optics warm and friendly. "I hope we haven't caused you too much discomfort, Cade," he said, his voice gentle and reassuring. Cade shook his head, a small smile playing at the corner of his lips. "Nah, it's fine," he said. "I just didn't expect to see all that." Optimus chuckled softly. "We are a unique species," he said. "But I am glad that our bonding rituals have had a positive effect on the team." Cade nodded, feeling a sense of respect and admiration for the Autobot leader. He may not understand all their ways, but he knew that these creatures were worth protecting, no matter what.

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Lmao this is so short but eh Yall want a behind da scenes of this? Basically the spicy bits and what happened while Cade wasn't looking lmao