(A.N.
A much shorter chapter. All chapters from here on out will most likely be short. I apologise if this upsets you :( No Jacob in this chapter, either, I'm afraid.
Hope you enjoy💜)
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The bedroom light was on. It was now or never.
The vampire leapt up to the window—already cracked open for a potential visitor—radiating the warm glow of lamplight and opened it fully to silently creep inside.
"Edward," Bella jumped in her skin.
"Hello, Bella. I apologise for coming unannounced." Edward placed Bella's car blanket, folded neatly, on the chair in the corner of her room. Bella ignored the motion.
"What are you doing here?" the girl asked, fixing her hair as she curled the chocolate brown locks behind her ear and looked up with those doe eyes.
"I came to apologise one last time. Bella, I really am sorry for everything I've put you through. No one deserves that." Edward explained, forcing himself to maintain eye contact.
"I told you it's fine. Every single moment was worth it because of you," she deflected.
"No, it wasn't. Bella, I also came here to tell you that I'm not going to change my mind. I'll stay in Forks, but I can't keep you. And that I'm sorry for hurting you like this. It'll be the last time. I promise." Edward looked down to the floor now. "...I think you should give Jacob a chance."
Bella blinked. "What?"
"He's good for you." Edward's eyes snapped to the dream catcher hanging on the headboard of the bed. The one Jacob got for Bella on her birthday. "I think he's good for me too."
"You spoke to Jacob? Did he put you up to this? 'Cause if so, then-" Bella started heatedly.
"I spoke to Jacob, but no, he didn't put me up to this." Edward defended, straining to subdue the same heat. "He had nothing to do with it. This was all my decision. Bella, I think you owe Jacob an apology. I have already apologised to him."
"What-? Are you guy's like friends now, then, or something?" She squinted in disbelief.
"Something. We're getting there," Edward nodded to himself. A small hint of pride flourished in his chest.
"Oh...alright. That's...good. I'm glad you two could set aside your differences and move forward," she also nodded absentmindedly and adverted her gaze to the side.
"I am too. I know that he makes you happy; I think you should give him a chance," Edward attempted to convince. "I know how much he loves you. You both deserve happiness together."
"Edward, don't," Bella shook her head with pursed lips pulled into a tight line. "I can't love him the way he needs me to."
"Then you know how I feel. If you really can't be with Jacob, then fine. I won't stand in the way of how things work out for the both of you. But I still think you owe him an apology. It wasn't right what you did." he frowned.
"So now you're lecturing me?" Bella asked, quirking a brow.
"I'm just trying to fix the messes I made."
"You think this is gonna fix our mess?" She retorted with a spark of anger.
"Yes. Bella...I believe I can be happy without you... And I want that. And I think you can too, but you need to let me go. I don't want to be your reason for living. I definitely do not want to be your reason for not living, either."
Bella was sat on her bed, looking at Edward with a blank expression before she turned away. "I can't believe this...After everything we've been through? None of this is making sense!" she continued to throw her arms up in the air and shake her head in that way of hers when she was confused and upset.
"Putting you in danger was never a good thing, Bella. It was never my intention, and I won't look past it because I did it all in the name of love. Neither should you. Do you understand how messed up that is? What happened should never have happened. It was because I made stupid, selfish, reckless decisions. I don't want to be that anymore. I want to be better. And I have to start by doing better. I don't want to leave you in the dust like this...But there is no other way to make the first step." Edward attempted to ease with clarification to ears that refused to listen. "Goodbye, Bella. I loved you, but this is what is best for everyone, including yourself. Stay safe."
Edward turned to take his exit out the window before Bella abruptly stood up to grip his arm lightly.
"So that's it? You don't love me anymore?"
Edward cringed, his upper lip curling in distaste. Could this girl not think of anything else?
"You were my first love, Bella. That never goes away. I'll carry the weight of you forever. You've taught me a lot, and I thank you unconditionally for that. But I refuse to shackle myself to the pain of our love."
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(A.N.
Thank you for reading! Please review.
Your comments make Edward smile and your votes tell Bella to shut up and get over it :3)
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