A Distant Memory

Chapter 21 - Surprise!

I was able to stop using my crutches now, and today was Rose's fifth birthday.

It seems as if just yesterday I was holding her as a new born, wondering why she had to grow up without a father, a father that would've loved her more than the world itself.

A few weeks ago, Rose said that she didn't want to celebrate her birthday which I knew was total bullshit. After knowing the little demon for five years I knew that she didn't want to be a burden to  me, especially after the accident.

Today I took the day off and called every planner I knew, I was getting everything done. For food there'd be vanilla cupcakes with a frosting pattern of daisies because those were her favorite, Agnes would bring her chocolate chip cookies, I also hired a baker to make a red velvet cake. For drinks there were chocolate milk, water and her favorite sodas.

I had invited my dad, Agnes and her husband, Rowan's friends, my friends, my daughter's close friends and Anderson, but only because Rose liked him and because he was the father of Rose's friend.

"Wait, the napkins are supposed to be white with small little yellow dots, not the other way round"

"Sorry, Miss. Luxor. I'll get them changed ASAP. The worker quickly picked up all the napkins and ran out the apartment, I sighed in frustration. "You good?" Kiara asked. "Yeah just... stressed" I rubbed my temple and exhaled. "Chill, girl. Everything's gonna be fine. Rose is gonna love this!" she smiled and pulled me in for another hug.

We stood there, hugging in silence until I pulled away. "Yeah but what if she doesn't? I mean, what if I'm reading this all wrong and she actually didn't want to celebrate her birthday?" I started fidgeting with the hem of the sleeves of my white shirt.

"C'mon Li. She'll love the party, I'm sure of it" she shot me a kind smile, I didn't realize that I was building up tears until I actually started crying hysterically. "Li..." Ki observed me with concern before pulling me into a tight hug, I couldn't breathe

Where am I? 

When did I get here?

Why am I here?

Why can't I breathe?

"Breathe" Ki commanded, when had I gotten to the floor of my room? Why was Anderson sitting next to me?

"I-" I tried to let the words flow out of my mouth like they usually would, but they just didn't. I didn't have enough air or energy to get them out.

A phone started ringing. My phone? Anderson's phone? Kiara's phone?

Ring ring ring.

Someone turn it off. It's loud. so loud.

"I have to go and pick Rose up" Rose, this was her birthday party. 

I am such a horrible mom, why am I being so goddamn selfish?

"Go." Anderson commanded, Kiara hesitantly got up and left. Anderson sat in front of me

"Breathe with me, Olivia" he commanded, I got lost in his melodic voice

He took a deep, slow breath in. I tried to do what he did, but it was just too hard.

"Name five things you can see"

"Y-y-yo-you" I gasped for air. "Good, now four more" he encouraged me, worry displayed on his eyes and I was grateful that it was not pity instead.

"B-b-b-bed"

"You're doing great, three more"

"D-do-door" Why was breathing so difficult?