suicidal ➵ larry stylinson

eighteen

that's my lockscreen lol ^ I think it kinda fits the story, am i the only one?

***

after what felt like hours of someone beating of the door, finally, all the noises were stopped and harry and niall got off the plane. louis thought it felt like eternity whenever he finally got off the plane.

he went to the small hotel he had booked, it was nothing special, simply a small, run down hotel. although, it didn't matter how it looked, louis was only there for one reason and that reason was soon to be fulfilled.

checking in, he went up slowly to his hotel room, admiring everything that was there, since it would be the last things he ever saw.

the walls were painted a light brown and most of the paint was peeling off. a few pictures hung on the wall, most of them were dusted so much you could barely see the picture, while there was one at the end of the hallway, perfectly clean. louis took a closer look at it, admiring the picture of the family. it was four little girls, their parents, and a little boy.

he traced his finger around the frame of the picture, smiling to himself. the picture reminded him of his family a few years ago..

perfect..

he unlocked the door with they key he was given with at the front desk and began to open the door, listening to it creak as it was fully opened. he had requested a room on the top floor, so that's what he got, thankfully.

rummaging through his bag, he finally picked up his phone and shut the door with the heel of his foot.

the bed felt like a brick whenever he layer on it, but it never seemed to bother him, he just kept skimming through his phone until he clicked on his mums number and waited for her to answer.

"hello?" she asked, he voice sounded like music to his ear and he wished so bad that he could just be with her once again. he wished they could have their family back to the way it was before. but louis had to except that the past was in the past.

before he could even comprehend what was going on, he felt hot tears on his cheeks and lifted up his sleeve quickly to wipe them away.

"mum.." he said, trying to sound fine but he failed miserably whenever he let out a whimper and started full on crying.

it's not that he wanted to be sad, because he didn't, he just was tired of feeling how he felt. he felt exhausted, tired, broken, and just done. he felt done with everything.

"louis? louis, what's wrong??" her voice suddenly became very panicked as he tired talking to the boy.

"i love you, mum, okay? never forget that.."

"where's harry? is he with you? don't do anything stupid, please. oh my god, i'm calling the ambulance, where are you?" his mums words all came as one sentence as louis hit the end button, ending the call and probably leaving his mum to have a heart attack, but he couldn't find any room in his heartless body to care.

he went to his messages and began to type a message to harry and niall in a group chat.

"another empty bottle takes a life"

he debated on whether or not he should send it, but instead of thinking for the moment in his life, he just sent it. he already had nothing left to lose.

the phone continued to go off with messages, making a ding sound every time it did. so instead of turning the ringer off, he turned his phone phone off, just in case harry was to try and track him.

louis went over to his bag, pulling out some alcohol, pills, and his razors. he set them all on the bed and sat down criss crossed right in front of it.

first, it was the alcohol, he drank as much as he possible could without getting sick. his head was already spinning and he felt as if he was going to pass out, but he continued what he was doing.

"cheers to you harry." he mumbled under his breath, sighing as he closed his eyes, dreaming himself into a better place.

the place he imagined was somewhere he wanted to be. the flowers were just starting to bloom and most of the kids were playing on the swing sets, laughing as they pushed each other.

that was his happy place, the place him and niall always went. but now, Niall had torn out his heart, ripped it up and stepped on it.

"this is for you, niall" he said as he took the pills, pouring a handful in his hand and taking them with the alcohol, causing it to leave a burning feeling down his throat. he kept taking handfuls of them until half of the bottle was gone.

and finally, it was the razor. he pulled up his sleeves, tracing all over his old scars, watching how his finger glided over them. he pulled up the bottom of his shirt, poking his ribs.

"fat" he mumbled as he picked up the razor, twirling it between his fingers and then finally placed it on his wrist. pushing down, he pulled it across, watching as the Crimson blood began the drip quickly down his arm and onto his sweat pants.

he continued doing it a few more times until he felt like his veins were burning. the alcohol in his vein mixing with the new cuts on his wrist didn't help anything.

he looked at himself in the mirror, the blue eyes he saw weren't the ones he knew. these eyes were a dull, dead color. nothing looked like himself anymore.

the blood was quickly starting to stains parts of the carpet, leaving puddles of blood everywhere on the floor. even know he just couldn't bring himself to care.

he went over to the window, opening it up and climbing onto it, watching the city below him. most of the cars were stuck in traffic and were honking their horns. none of them noticed the bit about to jump from the window. or, maybe they did noticed, they just didn't care.

everything seemed to happen so fast for him, for the next thing he knew, there was loud banging on the door, a loud thud, then someone arms were around his waist before everything went black.

***

so that happened.

i didn't really want to post this until friday but i just figured i should considering lately I haven't been updating and there's not even 1,000 words like there's supposed to be.

and for anyone who's retweeted that status, thank you because omfg there's 500 retweets in two days like, holy shit.

last thing, does this story need a new cover? I think it does bc that's ones old and ugh. the picture I had at the top, I was thinking about changing it to that but.. yeah.