The Sub Rosa [Completed]

The Sub Rosa

He loves me not.. He loves me.. He loves me not.. He loves me!

Sa tuwing uunahin ko ang hindi niya ako mahal ang ending ay He loves me pero kung ito ang nauna ang huli ay He loves me not.

Marahas akong napabuga ng hangin medyo naiinis ako dahil maski sa flames parang ayaw kaming dalawa.

"Hija, why are you still awake?" Nakatayo sa labas na pink na pinto ang mukhang striktiko si Dad. He never laid his hands on us. He never hurt us.

Umupo ito sa upuan ng study table ko at tinignan ang mga bungkos ng bulaklak, pirapiraso ang ilan at gutay gutay. I lose my temper dahil hindi kami pwede ng mga crush ko.

"Dad I'm not pretty po ba?" Naiiyak na tanong kasi bakit naman wala akong friends and my crush doesn't like me back.

Nakita ko ang pagtingin nito sa flames and Dad was kinda amuse when he saw three names of boys and mine.

"You're so pretty anak higit pa sa inaakala mo. If boys don't like you now hayaan mo once you grow up they will chase you. Ikaw naman ang huwag magka-gusto sa kanila." Inaalo siya ng ama pero hindi parin niya magets ang sinasabi nito o pinupunto.

"I can't understand you Dad." Curious man pero atleast gumaan ang loob niya.

"You're too young for love, enjoy muna sa pagiging bata." Sumimangot ako dahil ganiyan madalas sabihin sa akin, kaya ko na kayang pumunta mag-isa sa school. Hmmp!

"But I'm 7 years old." Tumawa ang ama at umiling sa kaniya. He tuck me in bed and read me my favorite Disney stories.

Tinulog nalang niya ang inis at pagkabigo sa mga crush. One day you'll see.

We support my father's candidacy for running as a Governor. Sweats are all over our head, back and chest but we didn't mind it because the love we are receiving from the people gives our father a strength and power. We love helping people with all that we can.

I was now 12 years old but still playing Barbies and Legos.

Tumigil kami sa bahay ng crush ko.

I'm excited to see his face specially his dark green orbs, it's so mysterious.

I can distinguished what's gwapo lang and what's handsome and Hot. Candy magazine  didn't help my mind about it instead I learned it from social media sites. It's super accessible and easily to use.

Yung crush ko, well according to google and this hotmensites.com pasok siya sa Handsome and Hot. I always felt this tingling sensation in my stomach whenever I saw him walking around.

Lagi akong sumasama sa business trip ni Dad or sometimes to my Kuya Tage, andoon din kasi siya he's been trained to handle business at the young age.

He have 6 siblings, almost all boys buti nalang they had sister. They're all good looking but my eyes are set for him.

I never had a chance to interact with him hindi dahil I'm shy but my father made me promise to never entertain boys, pag 18 nalang daw ako. Matagal pa iyon baka mag-asawa na siya!

Thinking about it makes my blood boils.

"Congratulations Tito!" Nakipagkamayan siya rito kagaya ng nakagawian nila. Close ang Dad ko sa father nila. I never saw him smile again kahit madalas ako sa bahay nila hindi na.

The last time I saw him smile when he was with this girl.

I have to thank all the saints na wala na ito.

I'm an evil child?

"It's too early to celebrate but thank you Hijo." Matagal na noon pinakilala nila ako rito but the only response I've got from him is nodded and Hi.