Girl from Mitras ★ A. Arlert

Chapter 66 - Start over

«You know that I've been broken down before

Now it's just something else I can't explore

I feel like every time it takes less and less

To move on with my mind, there's nothing left

Now I want all of those days, I want the sun in my eyes 

I want more of those feelings crawling up my spine

Every day I want more than I

I want more of you»

«And why did I do it? He wanted the best, and I... a weak-willed idiot. A bit of alcohol and a broken heart... And so, I lashed out like crazy... And he... He didn't want to... But still...» Y/N lay in her bed, remembering the events of the previous evening. She was ashamed of herself. She didn't know how to talk to Levi now after what had happened. She acted just... terribly. But.... damn... it was good.

Yesterday, she clearly understood that, even after breaking up with Annie, Armin didn't want to talk to her. He mostly spoke to those invited on working topics, avoiding anything personal. He didn't look at her, at least she didn't notice. He... started drinking a lot, Y/N noticed it. This year has changed him. He looked exhausted. The boyish delight disappeared from his eyes, and his eyes were... tired, sad. «Apparently breaking up with Annie had crippled him, well... not my problem...» She still loved him, but... seeing him like this, she didn't want to anymore. He reminded her of Levi when he was in a wheelchair - did everything without thinking, was cold, repulsive. Remarkably, Jean never wrote about how Armin had changed. He wrote mostly... about himself. And yesterday... Y/N understood why. She was pleased with his attention, but... She had enough problems with men in her life...

Getting out of bed, she felt pain in her legs. «Well, it must have been worth it, I guess. And the point is clearly not that I danced a lot...» She remembered her trip to the conference room with Levi, which made her bite her lip. This time it was different. They both just went crazy. Before, their sex was more leisurely, gentle, but yesterday... It was no worse and no better. Just different. It was passion.

Thinking about this, she got up and went to clean herself up. Last night showed her that she could have other feelings for Levi. And that means... she perhaps will fall in love with him after some time. Looking in the mirror, she gasped. There was a bright purple hickey around her neck, and light bruises could be seen on her hips and waist.

- Damn, Levi, what the hell... will have to give up the open shirt.

This made her smile. Leaving the bathroom, she thought about how to joke about it later, while she remembered another moment from last night.