Faceless || Simon "Ghost" Riley X reader

new beginnings : chapter 1

-if you see spelling errors, no you didn't. 😘-
a/n: my dumbass just realized i switched between 1st & 3rd person numerous times. please ignore my stupidity 😂

I couldn't remember exactly when I had decided I'd join the military. One day I just knew it was what I had wanted to do. My mom never understood why, nor did she try to. She thought it was my duty as a woman to start a family. Leaving was easy. The training was even easy compared to the phone call I had gotten from her. Hearing her voice quiver. Her screaming. The way it constantly replays in my head. I had Luke to get me through that. We were inseparable. He's been my best friend since basic training. We've gone on countless missions together. People never understood our relationship, and frankly, I don't either. We're polar opposites. I practically live on base, while he's always wanting to go home. I constantly look to get better, knowing the better I get, the more missions I'll be able to go on. Keeping me away from my hometown. It's been a little over 5 years since the incident, and I'm in no hurry to relive it by going back "home".

I'm awakened by my alarm blaring at 5:30 am. Luke and I are being sent out to help on a mission called 141. We have no intel on what it's about, but that doesn't make me nervous.

As I turn off my alarm I check to see if I have any messages.

None.

I decided to shoot Luke a message.

"You awake?" I press send as I hobble out of bed. I'm not NOT a morning person, but I'm also not a morning person. As I walk over to my dresser I feel my phone buzz, followed by a ding. I open it immediately, knowing it'd be Luke.

"Yeah. You nervous?" I let out a chuckle, knowing he was just being a jackass.

"Oh come on Luke, you know me better than that." I type out but was interrupted by a knock on my door. I set my phone on my dresser, looking down at my pajamas while walking to the door. As I open it I hear sniffling. I make eye contact with Amelia.

"y/n I don't want you to go." She looks up at me with her big blue eyes. I can tell she didn't get much sleep.

"I know. But I have to." I give her an "I'm sorry" look and she nods.

"I'm aware. It's just not fair. What if I don't see you again?" I had befriended Amelia the first week I was sent here. She was a medic who had treated me for multiple wounds.

I lean in to hug her but I notice her left fist is clenched. Once we had let each other go, she holds her hand out to me.

"I got you something." She says wiping her face as I reach for it. I look down at it. It's a beautiful, yet simple necklace. The gem is white with some colorful speckles, the chain is silver. My favorite.

"It's called opal." She adds. "We saw it at the shop we went to a couple of weeks ago. I went back and got it as a farewell gift." Her eyes are piercing. It's a feature of hers I adore. I look back up at her and smile.

"It's beautiful Amelia." I lean in for another hug. "I didn't think to get you anything. I'm so sorry." I let go of her and look down. I feel ashamed. I feel so shitty.

"y/n, you don't have to get me anything. You've helped me so much and have given me irreplaceable memories." I nod and shrug my shoulders.

"I have to-" She cuts me off.

"I know. You have to get ready." she pauses. "Promise me I'll see you again?" She said it like it was a question, but I knew it was more of a demand. We both know I can't promise anything. I simply look at her and nod.

"I'll be in touch with you. For sure." I say. She looks at me with her eyebrows pressed together.

"I'll text you every chance I get." She says, hugging me for the last time. "Please stay safe y/n." I watch as she walks away, holding her head down, and rubbing her arms. This is why I keep to myself. I hate hurting people. It seems to be the only thing I'm good at. Whether it be enemies, friends, or even family. I'm going to end up hurting someone.

I close my door and walk back to my dresser. I look down at my phone realizing I didn't get the chance to send my text. I decide to just leave it be and grab my clothes. Tactical pants, a compressed white shirt, sports bra, underwear, and the fashionable long black socks. I head to the bathroom and turn on the shower. I set my clothes down on the counter, waiting for the water to heat up. I take a long look at myself in the mirror. I've rarely done this. People don't care what I look like on the battlefield, as long as I can do what I've been sent to do.

My eyes land on the top of my right eyebrow. I stare at the scar that has formed from my last encounter with an enemy. Remembering the pain I felt when he took his knife to me. I cringe remembering how I killed him. Not only watching but feeling the life slowly slip away from him, was not something I enjoyed. This is who I am now. A cold-hearted killer. It's for a good cause though right?

I look at my hair. Seeing how long and dark it's gotten. I smiled, amazed at how healthy I'd kept it despite my busy schedule. I noticed the steam filling the bathroom, signaling me that the water was hot enough now.

'Finally.' I thought to myself. I strip my clothes off and step into the shower. The water is extremely hot. I just stand in it motionlessly. Maybe I need help. I tend to burn myself whenever I've hurt someone I hold close.

Once I'm done with my shower, I blow dry my hair. My towel is damp and it's getting obnoxiously cold in the bathroom, so I decide to get dressed. I continue blow-drying my hair until it's completely dry. I finish off with my hair care and throw on some moisturizer. I pack all my toiletries up in my bag and walk out of the bathroom.

"Fuck. Deodorant." I say to myself. I place my bag on the bed and search for my deodorant. Once it's been found, I put it on and continue packing. I grab my phone and look at the time. It's now 6:58 am and I know I have to get going, the flight leaves at 7:30. Placing my phone in my pocket, I take one final look at my room. I've called this place home for 7 months, now it's on to the next. I throw my bags over my shoulder and head out the door.

-i know this part was boring but please bare with me. i'll make it more juicy 💅🏼-