SALVATORE #2: Womanizer's Little Girl

CHAPTER 36

TRIGGER WARNING AHEAD

Sa daming nangyari ay dito rin kami bumagsak. From filing the case, investigating, finding strong evidences and all.

Wala ako sa sarili nang mangyari ang mga iyon mula noong nalaman kong alam ni Hezekiah. He knows everything and yet he never came to comfort me.

I thought he cared for me? I thought I am his girlfriend? Oo nga pala. I'm no longer his girlfriend. May fiance na nga, e. I was thinking what are his thoughts about it.

Is he disgusted? Does he feel sorry? Naaawa ba siya sa nangyari sa'kin? I don't even know a fucking bit about his reaction. Alam pala niya noong una pero bakit hindi niya ako kinausap? Bakit noong nawala ang anak namin ang may ibang fiance na siya?

May pakialam ba talaga siya sa'kin? Sa mga galaw at pinapakita niya ay wala! Ang sakit naman ng mundo. I know I'm screwed even before everything happened. Mula noong ipinanganak ako, alam ko nang walang puwang ang mundo para sa'kin.

Wala naman akong maalalang kasalanan para mangyari sa'kin 'to, a? Did I took all the punishments that should be for my parents? Did I took all of that? Sa nangyayari ay oo! Gano'n ba talaga?

I've been a religious person before when I was young because my grandmother takes me to church every Sunday before. I kept asking Him why pero walang kahit anong sagot sa tanong ko. Isang tanong lang iyon pero walang sagot. And that's when I'm slowly loosing trust in Him.

"What's wrong, baby girl? Trying to convict us now, huh?"

Boses pa lang ang nanlalamig na ako sa sobrang takot. I cannot feel my hands and feet after hearing that voice. My body's paralyzed! Fuck, Caprice! Do something!

Kahit anong kumbinsi ko sa sarili na gumalaw at umalis sa lugar na iyon ay hindi ko magawa. Ni hindi ako makalingon dahil sa panlalamig ng buong katawan ko. I feel my body's frozen on the spot. Hindi ko pa ng nakikita ang nakakadiring pagmumukha niya ay ganito na ang reaksyon ko. Don't be so weak, Caprice! Face him!

"Didn't you enjoy what we did back then?"

Then I realized he's not alone. They are here, they are all here behind me. Ang boses nila na matagal nang namungad sa utak ko ay naririnig ko na ulit ngayon ng klaro. Shit! How can I face them when I'm alone here?

Where's Dad?! Bakit mag-isa ako?! Gano'n na ba ako kawala sa sarili ko at hindi ko na napansin kung saan napunta sina Daddy?

Tears started building inside me as I feel my body tremble. Pagkarinig pa lang ng boses nila ay nanginginig na ang buong katawan ko sa takot. Takot na mangyari ulit iyon sa'kin. The trauma they caused me wasn't that easy. Konting trigger lang ay nagwawala na ako and yet here they are, behind me—talking to me.

I slowly look behind me and saw the two monsters that made my life a living hell. Their smirks, disgusting smiles, and encouraging face made my insides turn upside-down. How dare they look at me like that?!

Stop, Caprice. They are trying to make you remember what they did to you and you shouldn't be affected. Be strong, Caprice.

I let go of my lower lip na kanina ko pa pala kagat-kagat habang nakatitig sa kanila. Dalawa lang sila. Their familiar faces made me remember everything and I could feel my body shaking. Parang ilang minuto na lang ay babagsak na ang katawan ko.

"Trying to convict you? Shouldn't you be in jail years ago? How did you escaped?" pinatapang ko ang boses ko kahit alam ko sa sarili kong hinang-hina na ako. I dared looking at their eyes directly and showed them I'm affected to their presence no more.

Matanda sila noon pero mas tumanda sila. Nadagdagan ang kulubot ng mga mukha nila na naaalala kong marami na noon pa. Even their physics changed. Apat na taon ang nakalipas pero grabing katandaan na ang dumaan sa kanila. They are using something for sure.