Hurt&Pain/Peace&Love

The Suicidal Mind (Part Two)

Author's POV
November 26, 2016
Huston, TX
Azah & Bey's Mansion
2:29 PM

Bey was over there everything by now. She was over her friends, family, school, her future, her life, the world, and herself. The only thing she wasn't over was Azah, and she didn't know if she could move on without her. That night her whole world came to a end, and now it's finna blow up and will cease to exist. She was making a full fledged plan on how to execute it, and make sure she's not found by anyone for a few days. She didn't want to be recognizable when she did it. She reached the lowest point in her life at this moment, and she didn't know how to lift herself up again.

"I already have the weapon I'm going to use. I just need to figure out what time I want to do it. If I don't set a time then I won't do it. I have to do it. For her, so I can be with her." Bey said as she wrote stuff down, and was about to start planning who she would be sending letters to after she did it.

Bey deep down inside knew that Azah wouldn't have wanted her to do this, but Bey felt like she had too. Azah was her savior, her lover, her caretaker, her patience, her heart, her soul, her spirit, her body, her smile, her eyes, her joy, her happiness, and her everything. Bey was so in love with Azah that even not thinking about her for more than one second wasn't a thing. She kinda depended on her most times, because of how much she helped her, but she helped herself too. Azah just didn't get her to see that yet before that night. When you put all your trust in someone to where you depend on them for everything. It's really hard to see them go, because now you feel like how can I live on my own when they were the only one you've ever known. That's how Bey felt, and she didn't know how to stop it.

Author's POV
November 27, 2016
Huston, TX
Mama C's House
3:30 PM

Mama Tina was stressing out, because she knew what Beyoncé was going to do. She saw the way her daughter felt about Junior, and how she looked at her. The way she acted when she was around the both of them. Beyoncé was a whole new girl from then on when they became a couple. When it was made official Beyoncé was more happy and joyful, but too depended on Junior. She felt like if she continues to depend on her for everything, then if anything happens to Junior, then something bad would also happen to Beyoncé.

"C my daughter is going to commit suicide, because Junior is going to die. She's going to kill herself, because the love of her life is going to pass away. She's going to take her own life in hopes that she'll see Junior in another life or in the heavens above. She's going to leave us just to be with her love. God i can't let that happen." Mama Tina stressed, as she cried.

"No no no no no. Stop it Tina. Listen to me she's not going to do that. Beyoncé is smarter than that. I know she loved Junior very very very very very very very very much, but Junior wouldn't have wanted her to do that. I believe she will stay alive, and will come back to us when she's ready. She needs time to grieve and heal, and we should respect her decisions, and leave her be for now." Mama C said, but Mama Tina didn't think she would stay.

"She depended on Junior too much. She most likely feels hopeless now that she's finna be gone soon. Tomorrow to be exact, at 8:48 PM as well. She also probably feels like without Junior nothing matters, and that her life shouldn't go on without her by her side. She's going to kill herself C I swear she is." Mama Tina said, and cried more into Mama C's shirt.

"Shhh shhh! You mustn't talk like that Tina. Get your mind off of that, and stop thinking like that too." Mama C said. Mama C lifted Mama Tina's chin to make her look at her. "She's going to be okay. Okay?" Mama C asked, and Mama Tina shook her head yes.

The eye contact they held was strong, and Mama C never took her finger away from Mama Tina's chin. Mama Tina started looking at Mama C lips, and lend in to kiss her on the lips. Mama C lend in too, and they kissed for a hot minute. This is where things get worse for Mama C, because now she had been verified to be messing around with three people. Two of which is Junior's friends, and one is Junior's girlfriend's mom. Mama C took Mama Tina's mind off of everything, and put it on her good, and put her to sleep afterwards. Usually she wouldn't, because she doesn't like taking advantage of people, but this time she felt like there was no better way to do it. She gave in, and Mama Tina gave it up.