Past and Present

Tents and Surprises

I walked away quickly as Carl stared a me in shock and what looked like horror.
I still loved him and it was obvious that he still loves me, but I couldn't deal with the fact that he might be cheating on me.

Days passed and we were still following the footprints that Beth had found.
Carl and I hadn't spoken in days. It didn't seem like he was heart broken over the fact that we weren't dating anymore. He found perfect company with Lily.
I wasn't completely sure of whether or not they were dating, but they were always hugging and smiling so I figured they were.
In my head, I told myself that all of this was my fault. I was the one that told him that I didn't love him. I said that. Not him.
He has every right to date whomever. I broke up with him.
The night came and we all set up our tents. Since there were three tents and four people, I offered to sleep with Beth, but Lily told me that her and Carl were going to share.
I was totally against it, but I kept my mouth shut and just nodded.
I set up my tent as I listened to Lily and Carl giggle as he showed her how to set the tent up.
Mine was up in a matter of seconds and I was in it in less than one.
I lay down in one of my bags and fell asleep.

I awoke to the sounds of moaning and groaning.
I grabbed the knife that was in my boot and crawled out of my tent.
I looked around and didn't see and walkers. I looked to my right and saw that in Beth's tent, there was a small flicker of light. She must have had a candle and was using it to read.
I looked to my left and saw that Lily and Carl's tent was moving.
My jaw dropped and I stormed over to it. Not caring for anything whatsoever except for what was going on in there.
I gave a small snort as I saw that the two idiots hadn't even zippered the flap shut.
I walked in.
"What the fuck are you doing?" I asked.
Carl and Lily were naked and making out in the the tent.
I looked away.
"Are you trying to attract every Walker for miles?"
Carl tried to say something, but I wasn't finished.
"Carl, we promised not to do that until we were older. You promised. You know what, I don't care anymore. Because we're not dating."
My voice was starting to get louder and I was starting to cry.
"This just confirms it. You were cheating on me, weren't you? You were fucking Lily while you were dating me, weren't you? I told you that I didn't love you because of it. You never did love me, did you?"
He just stared at me and I looked at them,"Oh God."
I ran out of their tent and into mine.
I pulled my knees into my chest and I heard footsteps coming behind me.
A shirtless Carl came into my tent, buckling up the belt on his pants.
"Why are you here?" I asked, swiping the back of my hand across my nose.
He looked at me sideways,"You ca barge into my tent and I can't barge into yours?"
I ignored him and continued to look at my knees.
"How could you?" I whispered,"We were supposed to... do that. Rhys was supposed to be me and you. Together. Forever and always. But you refused to do it with me because we were too young but you'll do it with her."
I looked at him,"Was I not good enough?"
He sat down next to me and took my hand. He then lifted my head off of my knees and made me look at him.
"Don't ever say that. You were good enough. You were more than good enough and I was devastated when you broke up with me."
I scoffed.
"You don't believe me?" He asked.
I shook my head,"No. No, I don't. It's only been a few days since we broke up and you're already fucking Lily."
He sighed as I lowered my head.
"It was a distraction. I was devastated by you telling me you didn't love me. I actually tried suicide to get out of here."
My head jerked back up at him,"What?"
He gave a sheepish smile,"I know. I told you not to and then I went and tried. I just couldn't think of my life without you. Speaking of which, why did you tell me that you didn't love me?"
I ignored him, but he kept on staring at me.
"Jocelyn," he started,"I asked you why you told me that you didn't love me."
"I thought that I could get you to not think it was a joke. I thought that you were cheating on me and when I tried to break up with you, you thought it was a joke."
His jaw dropped,"You thought I was cheating on you?"
I nodded and put my head back down.
He took his index finger and brought my face up I to his and kissed me.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until now. I missed him, but it felt kind of weird since he had just been with Lily not more than 10 minutes ago.
I pulled back,"I can't. Not now. You're with Lily."
He laughed,"But I don't love her. Like I said before, she was a distraction. I fucked her. I would make love to you. There's a difference."
I smiled sheepishly.
"I love you. And don't deny it, I was packin."
I started laughing and he pointed at his "special" area.
"Don't deny it."