My Understandings [ON HOLD/EDITING]

My Understandings: Part 10

"What?!" Alan and Austin shout in unison. I look to the ground and start to think about who it would be. Who would be in my house without me there. My dad has no friends or any sort of social interaction with anyone. Who would be at my house. I think harder and it hits me. My heart drops to the floor.

"My mom said she would be back to see me... What if... What if it was her?" I ask. I start to sob and I hear both the boys get out of the car and climb into the back seat. I feel two sets of arms wrap around me. How could this happen to me? Why? I try and be happy and it just gets thrown to the ground.

"Edith I bet it wasn't her. She would be looking for you not with your asshole dad." says Alan. I continue to cry, just knowing that someone else got hurt too. Austin scoots closer to me and rubs my back. They both don't say anything for awhile, it's nice though. Just to sit and cry about everything. Everything that keeps happening to me and all this shit.

"We need to go back to the hospital. I need to know who it was!" I shout sitting back up. Both the boys look at each other and nod. Alan climbs into the drivers seat and starts the car. Austin stays in the back to comfort me as I put my face back into my hands. Austin pulls me closer and leans his forehead on the side of my head. 

"I'm so sorry that all of this is happening to you Edith. It's all my fault.... I should have never made you leave. I-I'm so sorry." He whispers in my ear. I sigh and look up at him.

"Austin... It's not your fa-" I start. He cuts me off and looks me in the eyes.

"Edith I know you're stubborn but please accept that I'm sorry ok?" I wince as I hear the tone of annoyance in his words. His face turns to sadness as he realizes what tone he used and leans his head on mine again. 

I wasn't lying. It really was my fault. I'm so dumb that I left my house a second time, knowing my dad would notice. I let my stupid feelings for Austin overwhelm me and it's all my fault. If I would have had some common sense then maybe this would have never happened...

"Edith don't you dare think this is your fault. Ok?" I hear Alan say from the front. I don't even bother to respond. I don't want to argue with him right now on how this is all my fault. I just continue looking at the dirty floor. I don't even think I can do this anymore.

We reach the hospital in about 5 minutes, Alan was speeding the whole way. I'm suprised we didn't get in an accident. 

I rush out of the car and begin to run to the doors but an arm grabs me.

"Edith you need to calm down and stay strong. No matter who this is I wan't you to stay strong ok? I... I can't see you get hurt again." says Alan, his voice cracks. I nod and he let's go of me as I run into the hospital and to the front desk. Alan and Austin trail behind me.

"Excuse me ma'am, I was wondering if it's true that there was someone else that was caught in the fire last night?" I breathe out. The nurse gives me a look of sadness and looks down for a second, then up at me.

"Oh yeah it's true. Poor girl, she's so young and this really shouldn't of happened to her." She says. I feel Austin searching for my hand and he holds it tight. Alan stiffens beside me and I start to think. It is my mom! No! Why!? My knees get weak but I stay strong like Alan told me too.

"What room is she in?" I ask quickly. The nurse tell me her room is 246B and I ask for her name.

"I'm sorry deary. I can't remember it." She says. I sigh, I still don't know what my moms name is. I thank the nurse and run down the hall to the elevator, both the boys at my side. I press the elevator button to floor B a million times.

"Come on! Come on! Come on!" I shout as I begin to sob. The elevator doors close and I lean my head on the wall and punch the door.

"Edith!" Alan shouts. He walks over to me and rubs my shoulder. Austin approaches me and searches for my hand again. He grabs it and I squeeze his hand tighter that ever. "You just need to calm down, ok?" He whispers in my ear. I let out a few more sobs and nod. If this is my mother... I don't know what I'll do.

I've spent my whole life wondering if she loved me or not, and I finally figured out that she did. The one person who hasn't been there for me could've finally been there but I had to go and fuck it all up. 

The elevator dings and the doors open. I look down the hall and see 246B is at the end of the hall, almost like it's staring at me. I take a deep breath and hold Austin's hand tightly. We all walk down the hallway getting closer and closer to the room I don't want to be anywhere near. We stop outside the room and Alan looks at me.

"You ready for this?" He asks. I nod and he opens the door. He stops in his tracks and stiffens. "Edith I think you should stay out." He says with fear in his voice. I push on his back and he turns around and tries to hold me back. Austin pulls me back by the arm, but I need to see.

"NO! LET ME GO!" I scream as I push Alan as hard as I can. Alan stumbles and falls to the floor. I turn around and smack Austin on the arm and jump over Alan to get in the room. I pause next to the bed and my world starts to crumble.

"Edith!" Alan shouts scrambling to his feet, Austin running in behind. I hear Austin gasp and Alan give out a sigh of defeat, he can't hide this from me now, it's right in front of me.

"Hi... Edith." She whispers out. She's attached to many monitors and her arms are burned bad. Her face is slightly burned but it looks like it would heal if she makes it. I kneel beside the bed and analyze her more. Her blond hair is much shorter now and she looks like she's in so much pain.

"I'm so sorry...." I say as I begin to cry. She grabs my hand and squeezes it tight.

"The doctors say that.. this is probably.. it for me... I'm so sorry Edith." She whispers. I look to the floor. No. This can't be happening, this can't be true.

"Austin... Call Phil, Tino, and Aaron..." I hear Alan say behind me, Austin steps out of the room and begins to talk to someone... I'm sure it's Phil because I hear words of comfort being said.

I look up into her blue eyes and she smiles at me, I feel my heart break, knowing this is my fault that she will die here in this hospital. I know she deserved better and if I could be the one on that hospital bed I would. In fact I think I might be the next one who ends up here, but not from an accident. 

I stare at her for awhile longer and hold back my tears. I need to tell her how terrible I feel.

"Kat... I'm so sorry." 

(Authors Note)

Hey guys! Sorry this was so short I just needed to get some information out but not too much :) I will update soon.