The Mogul (Mature Niall Horan) | Reposted

Chapter 28

I walked her all around, and I saved the very best room for last: the master bedroom.

"This can be your room tonight or not, it's up to you. I'll sleep on the couch."

"You can sleep in bed with me you know."

"Oh?" I smiled a bit. She walked over and placed herself on the bed. I felt my heart fluctuate, speeding up, heat spreading over my cheeks. 'What are you doing Phoenix?"

"I don't know... we've been talking for hours a day lately, we go out often. I'd like to... express ourselves in some way other than verbal."

"No, that's not what this trip was about."

"I don't care; it's what it's about now."

"No Phoenix. I won't touch you."

She made a face, and sat up higher, pulling off her sweater. She sat back in what I guessed to be a sexy bra, to her. It was basic black that made her chest look... very nice. That wasn't a lie. It had a bit of white lace around the top, simplicity won for her. I stared, her soft, warm looking body, the tattoos. I swallowed, feeling myself grow, unable to help it.

"Come on Niall."

"No." I balled my fists.

"Why don't you want me?" She whispered. "What is so wrong with me? We talk, we laugh, and we spend time together. I'm just... not good enough to fit in your perfect, gleaming world you're making for yourself."

I frowned. "That's what you think?"

"What else would I think? I think I'm a very nice girl. I'm not a model but I like to think I'm pretty. I'm polite. I'm honest. Those are good qualities. What else could be wrong with me besides the fact that I just don't fit with you." She grabbed her sweater, putting it on in defeat. "I want to go home. Just... we'll stop texting, I don't fit with you. Like I thought before, you're designer and I'm Wal Mart."

I felt terrible. I came and sat with her, brushing her hair back and tipping her hung head so I could see her beautiful eyes.

"Phoenix, I never once thought you wouldn't fit in my life. I just don't think you should or could handle it. I think you're incredibly warm, you're funny, and you're bright, gentle, and beautiful. You have many great qualities, not just good."

"Then why can't you just make something happen between us? I'm in this. I love spending time with you Niall. I light up when I see a text or a call from you. I'm so hopeful every day after school you'll be leaning against your car to surprise me. I like you, I'm crushing terribly on you here but you just stare so impassively from me."

"I don't know how to do affection.'

"You have little ways. The way you guide me or have your hand on my lower back is affectionate. When you brush my hair out of my face or when you kiss me gently, that's very affectionate. You said that there are a lot of reasons you don't date, just talk to me about it. I can't keep liking you when I know nothing will happen."

"I just... I have a lot that went on in my life. It made me very cold and... detached. I don't get attached to people Phoenix, I don't know how. I made myself the type of man that... if I was the last person on earth I'd be perfectly fine with that level of isolation. You're younger than me, innocent; you're much softer than I am. I don't know if we'd make it. I don't know how to be a boyfriend and I truthfully don't want to learn how to be one at this point in my life."

"Can't..." she frowned. "Can't you give me a chance to thaw you out?"

"What would that entail?"

"More time together, dates, I don't... want you sleeping or seeing anyone else." She mumbled. "I want you to get to know me on different levels, and I want to get to know you on different levels. That is all I'm asking for."