Say I'm Yours

Walk Away

"Olivia! Don't you walk away from me!" 

Spencer called out to her as she strolled past him vastly, picking up her pace to ensure he couldn't catch up.

"Olivia!" 

Her stride paused. They had did this dance with each other over an thousand times. She knew the steps before they came, four steps forward, twelve steps back. They circle the floor without finding any kind of rhythm or consistent beat. Just stagnant, and Olivia was burnt out from it. This song and dance lasted for two decades going on three, and it was time for one of them to end it for good.

"I'm not doing this with you anymore, I'm done" 

Olivia says, her back turned away from him.

"Done being only good enough for you to smash and pass whenever I let you. Done being just expendable, and the girl who sits on her thumbs waiting on you, hopin and praying you'll finally tell me those three big words and act like it. The more you pull, the more I break, and I can't take much more. You're driving me crazy"

The pattle of his feet approaching her made her heart throb. If there's one thing Olivia can't resist in this lifetime, it was Spencer. He knew what he was doing, always did and she folded under his spell everytime. Spencer is the epitome of Olivia's heart, the only thing in this world she could never quit. The home of her heart was always inside of him. She has walked away, then came running right back into his arms, then left again. 

Anyone you asked would say she was the dumbest girl that lived for doing so, but she wasn't naive to that. She was like an guitar, and he played on her strings time and time again. Like the good saying goes, you can't help who you love, even if they are all wrong for you. It's hard loving someone who refuses to love you back in the same way, and she's spent two decades waiting on Spencer James to open up his heart to her. She's now realizing that just may never happen and she can't try and force it. Her efforts fell short, and she was throwing in the towel.

"Liv" 

His voice cracked singlehandedly.

"Don't leave this time. I'm trying, baby. I'm trying so hard to get my head on straight"

Her stomach clenched at the lies he spoke as words. Nothing had changed, the vial difference between now and three months ago when they ended things, was that this time, she wasn't running back. His hands gripped her shoulders, pulling her against his frame, dropping his lips to her locks. His breath was full of warmth, the feel of it rendering her eyes closed to relish in the feeling. This was her problem, the longing and desire she carried for him that had her back in his arms, where she shouldn't be but so desperately wanted to be anyway. 

An big part of her didn't care either. His touches, his ability to make her body melt with his, awakening each nerve in her body igniting the hope that was once lost before. Hope was just an fairytale, an figment of her imagination to ignore the harsh truth of the reality she couldn't seem to face when it came to him and their unconventional relationship, if you could even call it that. Now she knows, she had no choice but to walk away. She had to let him go. Not because she didn't love him or wanted to be with him, but because the steps of this dance would remain the same. It wasn't changing and she needed an real change. If not for them, then for damn sure for herself.

"When you do, I pray that you're happy afterwards" 

She turned, facing him, ensuring he would hear the honesty and sincerity through her genuine words.

"I pray you'll find the woman that's worth giving your heart too, not just half but all of it. But that girl isn't me, I'm not her. I wanted to be, hell tried to be"