Freaks and Geeks - Season Too!!!! (SATIRE!)

S02E03 - America, What a Town (Part 4)

Daniel sighed, looking around the shop room and examining his fellow students working on their own projects. The class was large, any respectable auto shop class had to be, but with the amount of students crammed in the room, alongside the cars that groups were working on, it had a very claustrophobic aura about it. While other students were all working on cars that had potential, or could at least be saved, Daniel and Sean were stuck with Kim's death-mobile - her 1974 AMC Gremlin. Not only was her car ugly as sin, rusting like it had a bad skin infection and guzzling gas like it was a Chevrolet Camaro (which it most certainly was not), it reminded him of Daniel of her... and all the times they had cramped sex in the back seat. He leaned against the front fender, his back resting against the hood of the vehicle and causing it to crumple under his weight, pinning Sean between it and the engine block. Surprised by his sudden predicament, Sean let out a short scream of panic. The resulting noise that escaped him sounded like it came from a child's play toy, but it did get the job done. Realizing what had happened, Daniel stood straight up and helped lift the hood off his friend.

"Sorry man," Daniel half-heartedly apologized as he looked over his friend to make sure he was alright. There was a dirty, oily imprint of the engine block across the right side of Sean's face, but Daniel chose not to comment on it.

"Yeah, yeah," Sean bemoaned, slapping at his overalls to clean them up as best as he could.

"I was just looking around, ya know, and seein' everyone working on something they love or something they can pass with, and then I look at this..." He turned slightly and examined the Gremlin with a look of disgust. "I mean, what the hell? I don't love this thing and I don't think we can fix it up enough to pass, so what the hell are we doin' with it?"

Sean sighed and shook his head, using Daniel's white shirt to clean grime and car chemicals off his hands. "I told you that the minute your dumb ass came up with the idea, but you were so sure that Kim would take you back if you could fix up her clunker that you wouldn't listen to me." Sean let his hands rest on either side of the car, looking dismal, yet still hopeful. "I still think we can get a passing grade with this thing, though. I mean, we're stuck with it now, so might as well give it all we got, right?"

There was no answer.

"Right, Daniel?"

Still no answer.

"Daniel?" Sean finally looked up to see what was keeping his friend so quiet and followed his stern, hard gaze towards the front of the class. The teacher, Mr. Guyevski, was walking towards the duo, skimming the paperwork in his hands and talking to what looked to be a new student trailing behind him. An old man in tight fitting jeans and a leather jacket shuffled behind the teacher, toward the men, his medium length gray hair slicked back on his head. The thick mustache across his upper lip was pure white, yet the tips were stained a dark brown. Wisps of smoke rose above him as he puffed on a large cigar.

Daniel lightly jabbed Sean with his elbow. "Something seem... off about the new kid to you?"

"Yeah," Sean nodded in agreement, trying to pinpoint exactly what it was. Finally it hit him. "We already got one James Dean wannabe in this joint and that's you. No moochin' off your moochin'."

Daniel nodded as well. "Exactly. Damn copycat."

The two were completely unaware of the new kid's true motive: to expose their car theft ring and bring them down. Even though nobody could tell because of his perfect disguise and unremarkable ability to just blend in with the high school kids, the new kid was actually a 57-and-a-half year old, seasoned detective working undercover at the school. Because they were complete and total idiots, Daniel and Sean had both unwittingly left a plethora of clues that led the police right to them when they dumped the completely stripped Morris Minorsuch frame in a shady alley. Clues such as crumpled, half-completed sheets of homework with their names on them, crusty, old, Playboy and Hustler magazines covered in fingerprints... among other things, and pictures of the two goofing off in a photo booth.