ONE SHOTSSS

Chapter 1- hogwarts

*Preparing for the yule ball*
Lian: So? How do I look?
Tess: *looks up from her book to Lian*
Tess: With your eyes.
Lian:
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Filch: Miss Lavrenc, you're not supposed to go to the Forbidden forest with miss Malfoy....
Lian: Oh I am...
Filch: You didn't do anyt-
Lian: I SAID I AM
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Draco: *sits next to Tess while she's reading a book*
Tess: Get the fuck out of here Malfoy.
Draco: How can you know its me?! You didn't even look at me!
Tess: GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!
Lian: *burst out laughing while she was drinking*
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Tess: Holy fucking shit!!!
Megan: Language!
Tess: Putain de merde!!
Megan:Thats....not what I meant....
Bucky: Did she just swear in germany?
Lian: Thats french you asshole.
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Lian: I'm gay, I stole Tess's book and almost killed Malfoy
Megan: YOU'RE GAY?!
Tess: YOU DID WHAT?!
Bucky:........
Bucky: So we're gonna ignore the fact that Malfoy is probably dead........
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Stuffed animal: *Has fur covering its eyes*
Bucky: *fixes it*
Bucky: Now you can see.
Lian:........
Lian: Is that Tess's?
Tess: GIVE IT BACK YOU MOTHERFUCKER-
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*At the zoo*
Lian: What are they in for?
Megan: I- this is not a  prison....
Lian: So....they can leave?
Megan: No, but-
Lian, pointing at a penguin:
I bet that one murdered someone......
Megan:.........
Megan: Look, Tess bought some stuffed fennec fox
Lian: Thats not a stuffed animal
Megan: *nodding head*
Megan:
Megan: WAIT WHAT-
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McGonagall: I hope you two have an explanation for this.
Lian: We have three actually.
Tess: Pick your favorite.
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Lian: Love you, Megan.
Megan: Love you too, Lian.
Tess:........
Lian: We both love you as well, Tess.
Tess: Thanks. I was feeling left out.
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Tess: kiddo can you say tess?
Chris:.......
Tess: C'mon lil guy its easy!
Chris: buu-yy
Tess: no kid, say tess
Chris: BUCKY
Tess: you are one little shit aren't you
Chris: shit
Tess: FUCK DON'T SAY THAT-
Chris: fuck!
Lian, entering the room: hey chris, having fun?
Chris: fuck shit!
Lian: WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT
Chris: tess
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Bucky: you didn't have to stab him
Tess: You weren't there. You didn't hear what he said to me.
Bucky: What did he say?
Tess: ,,What are you going to do, stab me?"
Bucky:
Megan:
Harry:
Ron:
Malfoy:
Lian: *nodding* Thats fair.
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*After yule ball*
Lian, sobbing into Tess's shoulder: She looked so good.
Tess: I know.
Lian: I'm so gay.
Tess: I know....
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*Slytherin table*
Tess: hey Malfoy do you want to see a butterfly?
Draco: sure
Tess: *throws the butter across the table*
Butter: *lands on Lian's breakfast*
Draco: absolutely majestic
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Megan: Thats ridiculous, Lian doesn't have a crush on me
Tess: *raising eyebrows*
Bucky: Yes she does
Harry: Yes she does
Ron: Yes she does
Lian: Yes she does
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Lian: (sitting on a sofa, sipping coffee)
Lian: Tess would throw herself in front of a moving car for you.
Bucky: (lying on the ground, staring at the ceiling)
Buck: Tess would throw herself in front of a moving car for fun.
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*slytherin common room*
Draco: guys I accidentally ate tess's chocolate, how long do you think I'll live?
Tess: ten
Draco: ten what?!
Tess: nine
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Tess: Can you guys at least try and see it from my perspective?
Lian: (Crouches down)
Bucky: (kneels down)
Draco: (Sits down)
Tess: I fucking hate all of you
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Lian: (is in the bathroom)
Tess: LIAN WE HAVE TO GO! COME OUT!
Lian: I'M GAY
Tess: WELL NO SHIT SHERLOCK
Tess: and get the FUCK out of the bathroom!
Megan: WAIT SHE'S WHAT-
Bucky: Where are we even going.....
Tess: Nowhere
Bucky:
Tess: I just wanted to see her hurry
Bucky: Oh god
Megan: SHE'S WHAT-
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Tess: Is that vodka?
Lian: yeah
Tess: straight?
Lian: no, gay
Tess: THE VODKA NOT YOU
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McGonagall: How did you manage to accidentally drop Malfoy from the window?!
Tess: We may have accidentally did it on purpose
Lian: *nodding*
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*car drive*
Lian: How many more miles?
Megan: 114
Lian: So I just go straight.
Megan: As hard as that must be for you, yes.
Lian: So gayly forward?
Megan: Gayly forward.
Tess in the back seats, dramatically singing: CRAWLIN' BACK TO YOUUU
Bucky in the back seats, also singing: DO I WANNA KNOWWW?!
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McGonagall: You lied?
Tess: I may have
McGonagall: You may have or you did?
Tess:
McGonagall:
Tess: I may have did.
McGonagall:
Lian: Honestly, what did you expect professor
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Tess: Only geniuses can say these words very quickly. Eye. Yam. Stew. Peed.
Lian: Oh c'mon. No one's falling for th-
Bucky: I'M STUPID
Tess: facts
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Tess: FOUR MONTHS
Harry: What is she talking about?
Lian: It's not that big of a deal-
Tess: THATS HOW LONG YOU STOOD BY AND WATCHED ME WATER A FAKE PLANT
Harry: *burst out laughing*
Bucky, entering the room:
So thats why it didn't die yet
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Tess: don't go in the common room
Draco: why?
Tess: i saw a spider
Draco: did you kill it?
Tess: i have two arms and it has eight its not fair 
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Megan: whats worse than heartbreak?
Tess: when you wake up in the morning and realize your phone wasn't charging
Bucky: When you wake up in the morning
Lian: When you wake up
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Lian: Would you rather stab Bucky or-
Tess: Barnes.
Lian: I didn't even say who the or was.
Tess: I don't care. Barnes.
Lian:
Bucky:
Bucky: I'm feeling a little unsafe.....
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Tess, running into the room:
LIAN-
Lian, whispering: SHHH!! Megan is sleeping
Tess, also whispering: oh
Lian, still whispering: whats up??
Tess, whispering calmly: there's a fire
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Lian: god I want to kill malfoy so bad
Tess: YOU?! Gurl I'm living with him in the same fucking common room
Megan: i- you know what, nevermind
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Bucky: Nice hair
Tess: Oh haha shut up
Bucky: Wha- that wasn't a sarcasm
Tess: Of course it wasn't *leaves dramatically*
Bucky: *glancing at Lian confused*
Lian: I'd say you'll get used to it, but I don't want to lie
Tess, yelling from another room: I'M NOT A LIAR
Lian:
Bucky: wHaT tHe fUdGe
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Tess: someone locked the fucking entrance door to our common room and I was trapped there for a WHOLE FUCKING DAY WITH MALFOY
Lian:
Tess: WHAT-
Lian: wHaT I dIdN't sAy aNyThIng
Tess: WHAT MF MAGIC DID YOU USE
Lian: HOW DID YOU KNOW IT WAS ME
Tess: YOU'RE NOT A GOOD LIAR
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