Chapter Thirty Two

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I thought I cried enough, but the words in my sister's letter ring through, both of us were so similar with our thoughts but both of us responded and acted differently. I can't help but wonder "what if?" What if we had just been honest about our feelings and thoughts? What if we didn't fall for the same person? What if there was not so much pressure to be the better twin but rather just be happy with who we are as a person?

I can't believe after all these years of hating Jordan and Katie, it was just wiped away. I couldn't help but feel that a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Everything that I thought happened between the two of was non-existent. They didn't have sex and they weren't together after their marriage, it was simply a mirage. I didn't even know how my feelings towards my parents started to change. Is that why my father came to see me? Because he and mum knew the truth? Were they feeling guilty?

It felt as if someone had wedged a rock down my throat as the word guilt swam into my mind. Jordan was innocent this whole time and I never gave him the chance to prove to me his love, to prove his innocence. I close my eyes as tears stream down my face and think of the way that I treated him after giving my body to him. I could feel the rock turn into bile.

My shaking hand reached out for my mobile and I sent a text message, hoping that after all these years he hasn't changed his number. Before I can regret my decision to message Jordan, a text pops up on my screen.

"I'm at our spot."

With that I dash out of my apartment and rush to the car as I make my way back to a place where it all started.

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