Shooting Star (Completed) [R-18]

32 : X

Martee

KASAGSAGAN parin ng kampanya kaya naman ay sobrang busy ang mga campaign assistants nila papa.

Sinasamahan ko si Santi tuwing kampaniya. I felt like I needed to. Dahil kung maiiwan ako sa bahay wala rin lang silbi dahil iniisip ko siya palagi. Kung naaasikaso ba siya ng maayos. Kung kumakain ba siya. I should not think of those anymore dahil may PA naman silang kasama but I do. And I hated myself for feeling two different emotions.

But every time I stand beside him, walk with him, I know that he secretly smiles. Gustong gusto niyang meron ako sa tabi niya. Kahit napapagod siya, tuloy parin.

During the nights, he spends most of his time on bed, deep inside me. Kulang nalang ay huwag na niyang hugutin ang kaniya sa akin. The passion every time we make love intensifies as my nights with him are counted. May mga pagkakataong nararamdaman ko kung gaano niya sinasamba ang katawan ko kahit pa tulog ako.

Countless times, he professed how much he is in love with me. His eyes shouts love. His actions support it. He takes good care of me. Kahit na siya dapat ang pagsilbihan ko. He makes sure I'm eating well. Mas inaalala pa niya ako kaysa sa kaniyang sarili.

Who wouldn't be in love with this man.

PAGKATAPOS kong maligo ay humiga na ako sa kama. Santi is out with some government officials. May parang party sila. I have chosen not to go with him dahil medyo sumakit kase iyung ulo ko kanina. He decided not to attend because he insisted to bring me to the hospital but I told him he should attend. And I don't need to go to the hospital. It's almost 10 oclock in the evening when I heard his car outside.

Ilang sandali pa ng maramdaman ko ang pagbukas niya ng kuwarto at pumasok ito. He's tipsy as he advanced in my direction. Nakangisi itong papalapit sa gawi ko. Nang makalapit na siya ay agad niya akong niyakap na parang batang nawala at ngayon lang nakita ang kaniyang magulang.

" Are you okay?" Tanong niya. Tumango ako habang yakap yakap siya.

" Kamusta ang party?" Tanong ko pabalik.

" I drank. I'm a little tipsy. I'm sorry if I smell like liquor." He whispered.

" Martee, do you still love me?" I almost stopped breathing at his sudden question.

Silenced enveloped the atmosphere.

" Kase ako sobra. I can't breathe without you. Hindi ko kaya Martee. Just the thought of you leaving me makes me a dead man." Bulong niya. I cupped his face as I wipe his tears.

" What do I need to do for you to love me? If I am too possessive, I can loosen up. I'll learn how to. Just don't give up on me" Tuloy tuloy parin ang pagtulo ng luha niya.

" I am in love with you. Do not doubt it." Pinunasan ko ang kaniyang luha na sunod sunod sa pagpatak.

" But it's not enough for you to stay" Bulong niya. Never did I imagine him to be this vulnerable.

Habang nakatingin ako sa kaniya maslalong nasasaktan ang puso ko.

He took my hands and kissed it multiple times.

" Please give me another chance. Let's make this relationship work." He pleaded.

" Please"

Martee, you can never find a man equal to him. This man is clearly and utterly in love with you.

Niyakap ko lamang siya.

I'll take the risk. He might have been emotionally cruel but still, he is trying his best to be a better man.

" I'm sorry" Ulit niya. Umiling ako.

" No, I'm sorry. Sorry because I planned to leave you. I got scared you would take away my freedom permanently. I accused you of everything. I put all the blame on your family. On you. Lahat ng kamalasan sa buhay namin. Hindi ko inisip na may kasalanan din ang pamilya ko. Naging makasarili ako. And when I finally opened up my heart for you, I got scared of how much you love me. Natakot ako dahil pakiramdam ko sobra sobra na ang pagmamahal mo sa akin na nasasakal na ako. I made myself believe that I don't love you that much. Na kaya kong mabuhay na wala ka. Na masmagiging masaya ako kung wala ka. But I have realized how deep my feelings for you. I'm tired of making myself believe of something that is not even true. Something that I know never existed. My love for you is engraved in the deepest portion of my heart." I told him. Nakatingin lamang ito sa akin. Parang hindi makapaniwala sa mga sinabi ko.

I showed him my ring. My wedding ring.

" We've struggled for too long. But right now, I'm going to risk everything for you. Simula ngayon, mamahalin kita sa buong makakaya ko. I'll take care of you. I'll be a wife for you. Babawi ako sa 'yo" I continued. I saw him smile faintly.

" Please forgive me for hurting you, Santi. I know that it hurts. So much" Ako na ang lumuhod para mapantayan ko ang tingin niya.

" I love you. You loving me is enough." He whispered before kissing me gently.

This is not a fairy tale. But in life, loving takes so much sacrifice. Love is learning how to be selfless.

" I love you" I whispered back.

——