"We need to talk." Louis' apathetic voice rang into his ear and he slowly lifted his head until his eyes fell on Louis' blue ones, expressionless and lacking life.
Harry didn't know what to answer to that, he couldn't make out Louis' mood when his face gave nothing away, he didn't want to anger him or make him hate him even more so he just nodded curtly and averted his eyes quickly. He scooted into the back corner of his bed hugging his legs, waiting for Louis to make the next move who just stood there observing him and when he saw Harry's posture and his puffy and red eyes, the bags under them and his shaking hands a terrible pain shot through him from head to his littlest toe knowing it was all his fault and he was proven once more to be the worst person on earth.
He collected himself and reached over to the chair that was standing in front of Harry's desk pulling it towards the bed. He ignored the hurt look on Harry's face and the deep frown at not even sitting down on the edge of the bed, but he just couldn't. He needed to keep as much distance between them as possible, otherwise he knew he wouldn't be strong enough.
"So..." He croaked out and quickly cleared his throat, though he had no clue what to say. He should've thought about that beforehand. "Do, uhm...do you know what happened?" He started slowly. He watched how Harry furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, of course he knew what happened, not even he was that dumb. "I meant if you know what that means, why it happened and why I kept my distance the last few days?" Louis asked more precisely when he thought about the same thing as Harry.
Now Harry's face changed into realisation and his frown increased but this time because he was clueless. He tried to understand it, he did for days already but the only thing he knew was that he liked Louis and he guessed that wasn't what he should be feeling about him and what happened shouldn't have happened.
"No." He whispered without lifting his head.
"Okay..." Louis sighed. "Listen Harry. What happened between us is normal for people who get closer, romantically or just physically, okay? It's basically the early stage of having sex when touching each other like this. But this is nothing brothers should ever do. I get it, you were confused and wanted me to help you, I don't blame you at all, but I shouldn't have done this and I'm sorry taking advantage of you like that. I should've explained all of this to you a long time ago already, but you have to understand that nothing that happened should've happened and should never happen again. And that's the same reason why you can't think of me like that. This is so wrong, Harry." He explained insistently, pronouncing every word to make sure that Harry understood where he was coming from.
Harry bit his lip harshly staring at his knees so Louis could only see half of his face and not the tears that welled up in his eyes. He tried to stay strong but Louis' words stung in his heart and he felt rejected. He had so many questions, but he knew better than asking now so he squeezed his eyes shut, just accepting it and nodded.
"Okay." He breathed out.
Louis observed him carefully, he was perplexed that Harry showed no reaction to it and acted so strange. He expected a question about why it was wrong or at least asking if they could go back to how they were, but nothing came.
"Okay?" Louis checked and Harry nodded once more. "So you understand where I'm coming from?"
Harry simply shrugged and continued staring at his knees feeling uncomfortable under Louis' gaze and right now he just wanted to turn back time to a week ago where everything was still fine between them.
"You don't understand it, right?" Louis huffed, desperate because Harry didn't talk to him at all. "Harry please talk to me, this is important!"
"Why?" Harry mumbled.
YOU ARE READING
Until they tear us apart. | l.s.
FanfictionHarry and Louis are growing up as brothers since Harry was five when Louis' parents adopt him. They always had a special bond and when there is one thing Louis cares for, then it is his younger brother. He always tries to keep him from bad influence...