to make things awkward | fillie

26 | fear

Over the next month, Finn and Malcolm worked tirelessly on their music. About every other day, Lucy would join them and they'd spend some time on their song. And Finn had to admit, it was all coming together quite seamlessly. The universe was on their side. Finally.

Three sessions into family therapy, Lucy had opened up even more, especially to Millie, though Finn could tell that she was still feeling insecure about her mothering. He looked up online how to be better at encouraging her, but what he found wasn't all that helpful. Mostly stuff about complimenting things you wouldn't think to, and being of help whenever she needed it. There wasn't much advice about how to encourage a mother who gave her daughter up for adoption and then had that daughter placed back in her care nine years later. It seemed like no matter what the situation, mothers often felt inferior. How could Finn explain to Millie how good a job she was doing?

She was doing so well, in fact, that he. . .well there was something growing in his chest that he tried to write off as intense respect, but after their night together, and the movie night, and just watching her with Lucy. . .maybe Elsie was right. But he wasn't sure, so he ignored it all whe he could.

For the first few weeks after their first therapy session, they all had dinner together every night, flipping between Millie's apartment and Finn's. With Jake in LA, everything was easy and Finn rarely felt anxious about their arrangement. But Jake was supposed to come back for a couple days for his and Millie's couples counseling, and they were all going to dine together, and Finn planned to talk with him then, like Charlie had suggested, but he canceled at the last minute and they did the session over zoom. Finn figured he'd talk to him the next chance he got.

But Millie didn't make it to dinner that night and had been acting strange ever since. Sometimes she seemed happy and normal, but other times, she was like a zombie. A shell of herself. It reminded Finn of the week she told him she was pregnant. He didn't dare ask, but Lucy told him that she hadn't seen Millie talking to Jake as much, and when they did, she would go out to the patio and almost always came in with a tear streaked face.

Reaching out to Noah didn't yield anything much, except it was clear Millie was struggling. Noah told him to keep his distance, but to do anything she asked him to. Seemed counterintuitive, but he listened. So when Millie asked him to drop Lucy off at her friend's house—used to be her foster family— for a sleepover, he agreed.

They were nice, not that he expected anything different, and he told them he'd be back to pick her up the next morning. They didn't act weird about who he was, which was a pleasant surprise. If he didn't know any better, he'd have thought they had no idea who he was, but he knew they knew him, because Lucy told him as much. "Not mega-fans, but they know you." she had said. They were good people, and he felt comfortable leaving her with them.

The only times Millie talked to him these days were at their sessions and at dinner. He savored every minute because other than Lucy and Malcolm, Millie was the only other person he really talked to these days. And he liked talking to her. What he didn't like was her yelling at him. Although he was partially grateful because it made it colossally easier to ignore his feelings for her.

"I'm not even the one who posted it." Finn said, more base in his voice than usual. Millie had come over to his apartment, fuming, her phone in her hand and her cheeks red. Apparently, Malcolm had posted a photo of them at the studio awhile back and Lucy was in the picture. You could barely make out her face though, and judging by the initial comments, no one suspected anything.

"Tell him to take it down." she said.

"You don't think that would raise some eyebrows?"

She silently glowered at him, tapping her heel on the ground.