Lava | Ninjago

🜃 | The Darkest Place

They watched as Kai ran into his room the moment they arrived back at the monastery. The familiar scorch marks traced his footsteps just as everyone turned to Cole. As always.

He sighed. "Seriously? Can't any of you do it?" he asked. Not that he never felt the need to go after Kai in those situations – but had it really have to be him in every single instance? "You're his sister, you're his brother, you, Jay... I guess you're an exception but Zane, you're the most intelligent one of us with ice powers. Why do you guys always pick me?"

"Your points are fair," Zane answered for them all, "however, you're the only one Kai is willing to listen to."

So, with another sigh, Cole asked for the mittens they got specifically for this and went to follow the scorch mark path.

Of course he needed to make sure Kai was okay, of course he needed to see it personally but always being picked to tame the firemaker's flames was getting tiresome. Kai is sad, go talk to him. Kai is mad, go make sure he doesn't set anything on fire.

And he knew that especially after today, it will be difficult to get through to Kai. Hell, they all struggled with it, they all had one more enemy to fight – the immense guilt whenever an innocent life was lost despite their attempt at saving them. Maybe it was another reason why everyone was so eager to pass this responsibility to Cole.

He's the mountain of the team of course.

The door wasn't closed. Kai liked to slam it shut in his fury despite not reaching the end goal of getting the most privacy. Or maybe he got so used to the ridiculous routine, he was expecting Cole to come and close it for him anyway.

Inside the room it was hot as if it was the hottest of summer days and they were stuck in a room with no air conditioning, not a single window opened. Cole was glad for his lack of sleeves but he knew he was going to sweat anyway. And the closer he got to Kai, who was sitting in the middle of the room, it almost began to burn.

Funny, people run away from fire while he goes to the heart of it. Or hearth? Since when did he also become a firefighter?

Focus.

Cole sat down in front of him, keeping some distance between them until the risk of getting blisters from touching Kai would be subdued enough.

"No one is blaming you, you know?"

Kai scoffed, leaving a bitter feeling in Cole's mouth. "Tell that to their family. They're probably cursing my entire life now."

"Kai–" Cole really wanted to touch him, to let his hand complete the journey instead of leaving it to hang helplessly in the air between them. But the warmth Kai was emitting was simply too much. "We can't save everyone. We will never save everyone," he said, as if the words didn't make himself angry. "All we can do is save as many people as possible."

"But why?" Kai looked at him and it was as if his eyes burned themselves. There were so many emotions, all mixed together, creating two beams of invisible laser. Cole wondered how he was still alive. "Why can't we? Why can't I? I'm training every day, I'm training at nights! What is it all for then? What is it for if I'm still not enough to save a single fucking person?"

His tears hissed and turned into steam. Cole watched it float and dissipate in the air because it was easier than to handle Kai's burning gaze.

It was difficult talking about something he himself struggled with accepting, believing in. Because he agreed with Kai. What is it all for? What are their powers, their teamwork, their machinery, their trainings for if they are still not enough to protect the world and everyone within? How come that after all those years there are still new enemies, new methods stronger than them?

"That's how the world works, Kai." He wanted to punch himself. But part of him still understood. "It's like the yin and yang. Where's light also has to be dark. And where's life, there has to be death."

"It's unfair," Kai muttered, looking down, letting his arms fall by his side. Cole hated seeing him like that. And he hated himself for hating it because it was who Kai really is. A man desperate to save everyone from the unfairness of the world. Another victim of its cruelty who just wanted everyone around him not to experience what he did. He was a carrier of light and warmth, however, the darkest place is under the candlestick, as they say. And Cole got a front row view.

"It is," he sighed.

"I could've done better." Kai turned his head away from him. He had no way of hiding but he could still try. Cole wished Kai understood that he did not have to hide before him. He reached out with his hand, placing it on the ground between them.

"You did your best," he disagreed.

Which only made Kai burn him with his eyes again, with his words. He had to retract his hand. "How do you know?"

"Kai–"

"How does anyone know anything? You weren't there! I had them at my fingertips! If I was stronger, if I was faster... If I wasn't–"

"Kai."

His face softened just as the flames disappeared again. There was barely any fury left in his eyes, just remorse, just guilt. Kai turned around until all Cole could see was his back.

"You can go now."

The single moment of silence was deafening, Cole felt he might as well drown and die in it despite just being in a blacksmith's hearth.

"I'm not leaving you."

Cole sat down next to him, held him close. Heat, blisters and mittens be damned, he could never leave him alone at a time like this. Fire needed proper care too and Kai needed someone by his side to remind him that he's not alone anymore. He never will be alone anymore. Even if his tears are like boiling water. Even if his guilt is like choking smoke, he is and never will be left all to his own anymore.