And What If I Were You

Chapter 1 - Part 8

Thursday, August 8, 2018

Hurawalhi Island Resort

Maldives

4.30pm. The honeymoon...

"Another, Louis?"

Louis looks up and finds Jamie's smiling face staring back, his hand around the stem of Louis' empty glass. It's only his third of the day, so another sounds pretty fucking good.

"Yeah, same again. Thanks."

Jamie picks up his glass and goes about making another Walhi Paradise. It's a mix of citrus vodka, blue curacao, and raspberry lemonade and goes down dangerously easy.

He'd refrained from ordering a Sex On The Beach from the cocktail menu because the cliché was just too overt. Not that he thinks Jamie would've judged him, but he would've definitely been judging himself. Of course, if Harry had been here, he wouldn't have been able to stop him from ordering one for them both. But Harry isn't here.

It's not exactly the honeymoon Louis had anticipated, sitting alone at the bar, scrolling through his phone and people watching. He understands though, and at least they've managed to finally get away.

The wedding was two months ago, right after Harry wrapped filming on Heaven's Gate: Commencement. But then there had been unexpected reshoots and some voiceover work to do in the studio, all of which bled into the start of preparations for the second movie in the trilogy, Heaven's Gate: Darkness.

Harry's manager had thankfully been able to negotiate a two-week stint in the Maldives for the key cast members and production staff, so now Louis gets to share his honeymoon with a bunch of strangers. Well, not strangers, as such. He knows most of the cast from the first two movies, not well, but enough to hang out with them and pass the time. Louis appreciates everyone being amenable to the location, although it's not exactly hard to enjoy a location like this with gorgeous weather, stunning scenery, and 5-star accommodations. It's just not what he'd imagined.

Harry is gone all day and their time in the evenings isn't exactly their own either. Dinners are spent rehashing the day's progress and planning for the next day. They haven't even managed to go to the underwater restaurant yet as it's fairly narrow and laid out for couples rather than bigger groups. Tonight is the night though, so Louis should probably be easing off on the Walhi Paradise's. But right now he's grumpy and feeling sorry for himself, so fuck it.

Jamie sets the blue concoction down in front of him. "There you go, Louis."

"Cheers, Jamie. How many of these do you make in a day?"

Jamie laughs. "About a million."

Louis picks up the drink and brings it to his lips. "Good to hear I'm an original."

He takes a sip and catches a glimpse of the pity in Jamie's eyes. He's seen that look too many times to recount. It's stupid, really. There's nothing about his life that should warrant any kind of pity. He's on his honeymoon with the love of his life, sipping blue cocktails on a tropical island for fucks sake. Still, he knows that look, and knows it well.

People who don't know him usually stare at him with narrowed eyes, green with jealousy, which is fair enough, really. Once they get to know him a little bit though, once they peek under the hood of his circumstances, there's a point when it morphs into something else, something even less appealing. A few carefully chosen questions. A few observations shared. It always happens.

That's also why he's sitting here at the bar alone, with only Jamie for company. The other spouses had seen it, had made some comments about how understanding Louis was to share his honeymoon with all of them. It had been lighthearted and non-confrontational, with no direct questioning, but Louis could sense the undercurrent of genuine disbelief.