Gently into the good night

Chapter Eight - Triumph of stupidity

"Take care. I want you all to be super good okay?" Uncle says as he is about to leave for the airport. "We will" All of us say in unison. We wave good bye as he stares at us hopefully through the cab's open window. After uncle's departure we go and sit inside in silence. Nobody speaks; we just sit there silently with no words floating in the air. Okay I can't bear this silence anymore (Yes, Women just cannot shut up) "I saw the time machine yesterday" I say with a spark of hope. "You did?" Jordan says as his eyes widen in astonishment, I nod wearing the widest grin on my face. "Can you show us?" Jordan says. "Paul?" I ask he nods in refusal. I escort Jordan to the basement and show him the time machine; he looks at me ominously and says "Isn't that more like a car? And to be honest I don't have the greatest felling about it." I sigh and say "Did you expect it to look like a clock because it's a time machine and of course it's safe why would you prophecy something negative." He just stares at Pegasus awkwardly "I don't know. I just feel something might go wrong. I have a sixth sense, you know" he says winking. I just roll my eyes and say "Sure" enunciating the sarcasm. We go back up to living room and we see Paul asleep on the sofa, he looks tired like a worn out rag. We just let him sleep and slowly go up to up my room. I see a few messages from Bethany on Skype.So Jordan and I decide to video call her. She accepts instantly. She looks tanned already and her peppiness has increased a thousand times more than before. We ignore the time and just keep talking to her. "Okay guys mum is calling, I got to go. Have fun you two and Jordan go for it, it ain't that hard." She says winking. "Bethany!" Jordan says in attempt to shut her up, his voice is full of annoyance and rushing embarrassment. She giggles and says "Bye, Love you" and goes offline. I close my laptop and look at Jordan. His face is flushing red and he is staring at his feet with embarrassment. "What was that?" I say smiling ,adding pressure to his stress. "Nothing, Bethany is just I don't know. It's nothing" he says cupping his face. "I have to make lunch, want to help?" I ask him ,changing the topic and trying to drift him out of his discomfort.

After the food is ready we wake Paul up, he walks and sits on the table in desolation. I look at him concerned and so does Jordan. We exchange looks and I say "Paul, what is it?" he just ignores the question and gestures me to give him the spaghetti. I keep staring at him and then he finally says for the sake of his growling stomach "Logan just uploaded a picture of him and Bethany kissing on Hawaii beach" Jordan's eyes widen he slowly looks at Paul and then shifts his gaze to me as though asking 'He still likes her?' I nod answering his non-verbal question. "Yeah, he went along with Bethany's family" I reply serving him the food "Why didn't you tell me?" Paul says in a weak voice. "The truth is never comforting" I say and sit down, we have a frosty atmosphere during lunch and none of us speak at all. After Paul finishes his food he strides up to his room amid with gloom.

I go after him and knock on his door "Paul" he doesn't answer. I open it slowly and walk in closing the door behind me. He lies on his bed , his eyes filled with tears. I go and hug him and slowly and stroke his hair softly. "Paul, it's okay. It will be alright" I say. "Why is it necessary to be heartbroken?" he asks. I think of a comforting reply and say "If we don't experience a heart break we won't be able to experience the joy when it's fixed by the right one" he plainly nods. I continue stroking his hair and after a few minutes I sense that he is asleep. I slowly close the door and walk out.

I spend the rest of the afternoon listing to songs and sitting beside Pegasus. Jordan comes down to the basement and says "Want to go to the beach? It's right next to the supermarket we went to yesterday" I nod. He drives and I look out at the never ending road. After we reach, Jordan guides me to the beach. I smell the mouldy seaweed that cresses the soft sand and then the smell of saline water gushes towards me. The sand is cold and fine, the crispy sun makes the atmosphere warm and comforting. Half crushed sea shells rock on the mini bays formed in the sand. A solitary bird walks by in elation. We sit on the cold sand and just listen to what the beach has to say. The wind blows my hair in all directions covering my face and I hear Jordan laugh. He slowly removes it from my face and for a moment we lose ourselves in each other's eyes. The sound of a small girl's laugh breaks the connection and we both awkwardly smile at each other and stare back at the sea. He puts his hand around my shoulder like he always does and nothing can be more perfect than the sunset that follows.

I drive back home, it's a little hard because the driver's seat is on the opposite side but we reach safely, I don't have my license here but luckily nobody cares to check. Paul sits on the couch watching television. "Hey, where were you guys?" he asks looking much happier and peppy. "We went to the beach" Jordan says a little intimidated "Oh" Paul comments a little annoyed. I don't know why Paul seems annoyed and Jordan seems intimidated. I just ignore it and sit down beside Paul. "So does the time machine work?" he asks wholly drifting of topic. "Yes" I say as though certain of its mechanism. Paul just laughs. "Shut up, I'll go and try it right now" I say, Paul laughs a bit more and says "Sure, where will you go?" he asks "Lincoln" I say feeling flustered and I go to the basement. From behind me I hear Jordan say "Don't do anything stupid Amelia, I don't have the greatest feeling about this" I ignore what he says and continue walking. I open the drawer where the instruction manual is kept and read, my mind seems to accept the data quickly and when I'm seated inside the machine I switch it on. Suddenly a feeling of fear swallows me. What if it doesn't? Then Paul is right. What If it does? Will I be able to come back? Of course I will. I say convincing myself with a partial doubt in my head. Maybe I should just wait for uncle to come back. There is no fault in trying though. I set the time to 1960 and Location to Lincoln, England. I slowly gulp as fear strangles me. Pulling this leaver could change everything, but I can come back the same way right ?I think trying to convince myself again. Let me just do it. I pull the leaver and I'm sure it's not going to work but to my surprise I succeed in spurring Pegasus.

"No Amelia" I hear a shout in the void space; I can't make out who it exactly is because the sounds fades away quickly, a sudden hollowness fills the air. Pegasus is flying so fast with such intense velocity I feel like I'm on a plane ten times faster or maybe more, I can see the shore moving insanely fast and suddenly it disappears. There is a bright light which is enormously strong and it completely blinds me. After a while the light fades away and when I open my eyes all I see is space, stars, a third dimension. Where am I? Just like we see light and physical masses, I can see the passing time Am I inside a black hole? I'm going absurdly fast; my eyes are not able to process the images. I'm probably faster than light and it's so hard to imagine. My body feels like it's going to cringe. I'm in silence, everything is silent. All I see is stars but they are moving so fast and quick I can't make out how fast I'm. The machine stops with a jerk and I nearly hit my face on the dash board. I'm too intimidated to scream. Am I going to die? The machine plummets before I can even realize. I'm falling Is all i know. The universe has no boundaries and at this point I think the machine has stopped working. I can't imagine my life is going to end this way. A shiver runs down my spine thinking that I'm going to be drifted into a dreamless sleep from which I can never wake up. I feel like I'm going to faint and all I can do it close my eyes. The Machine is moving rapidly downwards, I'm falling. I'll keep falling forever. I might keep falling and maybe I will be pulled into a black hole or maybe the oxygen will be over and I might suffocate and die. I might crash into a meteoroid or I might die of hunger. However I might die I won't be at peace. But there is no point complaining. I'm responsible for my actions. I'm responsible for this. I just wish I could tell my family and friends that they should stop waiting for me. I might never come back. It's over, everything is over. I'll soon be entering the pavilion of the dead, the mortal, hopefully the heaven of freedom and not the tether of hell.

I close my eyes and prepare to sleep forever.