"𝑀𝑦 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑠 𝑏𝑟𝑜𝑘𝑒𝑛,
𝑖𝑡 𝑏𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑘𝑠 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛,
𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒'𝑠 𝑛𝑜 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑠 𝑠𝑝𝑜𝑘𝑒𝑛,
𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑠𝑡 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑖𝑠 𝑠𝑖𝑙𝑒𝑛𝑡"
❛ 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒔𝒖𝒏𝒈
❛ 𝒕𝒘𝒔: 𝒓𝒆𝒇𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒅 𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒎 (𝒄𝒖𝒕𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈)
❛ 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅𝒔: 1514
***
It hasn't happened in a long time which on the other hand can be a good thing; Jisung's simply happier, doing better. On the other hand it can be worrying and questionable; Jisung's good at hiding things behind smiles and reassurings. So, sometimes it can be difficult to see through him, read him and know what's exactly going on.
It happens after a long while. Chan's working on a song that has been bothering him for a while now. He could use a break but his brain always responds: after this one thing. So, the break never comes and although the tiredness is heavy on Chan's eyelids and shoulders, he can't bring himself to call it a day and go to bed.
He has his headphones on but only the other side covers his ear. He often does this to hear the music and his surroundings at the same time. He's a practical person after all.
It must be a late evening when hears the door to his room open slowly. He expects it to be Jisung and that's fine; the younger boy often comes to his room either to seek comfort, to bother him with dumb puns and teasings or to just simply hang out and chill.
"Hyung" Chan hears a quiet whimper which instantly gets him alarmed with pure worry. He turns around and there, in the doorway stands Jisung. He's buried in an oversized hoodie, probably Chan's. Chan doesn't mind, in fact, he loves when the younger wears his clothes. He loves how big they look on him and how small his naturally petite body looks in them.
The younger fidgets with his fingers which are hidden under the long sleeves of the hoodie. It's cute but the way the younger looks right now is worrying. He seems hesitant, unsure.
"Hannie? Is everything okay?" Chan asks carefully as he eyes the boy's face. He can't spot any signs of crying, his eyes aren't red nor do his cheeks have any dried streaks of spilled tears. The boy's head is hanging low, eyes downwards and he looks shy which isn't typical behavior for him when he's with his hyung.
And the way his shoulders are slumped and how tense he is get to Chan.
The boy looks like he's holding himself back, holding the dam back from falling down and holding the gate shut from opening completely.
He looks like he's been battling with his inner demons in his head for a while now and is on the verge of losing that battle, not knowing any other way to ease the pain and suffering but with coming to his hyung.
Chan is glad he does.
Chan's the only person Jisung truly trusts and relies on. Chan's the only one who has won the younger's heart and trust and he'll never let it go. He'll treasure the younger forever- for how long the other lets him. His strengths, weaknesses and flaws- all the different beautiful features included.
The boy stays still and quiet. His eyes wander around but don't meet Chan. Chan wants to scoop him into his arms and squeeze the life out of him. He waits for the other to come to him instead. That's how it works for them after all.
"U-uhm..." Jisung starts and looks down once again. His body is lightly violated by little trembles, Chan notices now. He doubts it's from the cold air.
