Deviant Fate

42 - Emergency Plan

-Gwen-

Everyone had dispersed to give Deacon and Fran time to collect themselves. I had gone outside and sat on the porch. I needed to figure out a way to keep Arowin from getting in my way. I wondered after everything was said and done what would life look like? Would Arowin accept the death of his father or would he try to avenge him? Would he try to continue the reign of the Velacara name?

"What are you going to do?" Everhett asked as he sat beside me.

"I don't know." I sighed. "I know what I should do, and for awhile I was keen on doing exactly that.—But, I don't know, maybe I'm just fucked in the head."

"He's your divine. Maybe he'll listen to you? Maybe you can talk to him?" He suggested, but I sensed the slight sarcasm.

"You have no idea how exhausting he is, how awful he can be." I growled out.

"Like it or not, there is a connection there. You just need to find a way to take advantage of it. Find a soft spot." He said.

"He doesn't have any." I whispered. "I thought if your divine was in pain it meant you were also in pain. I thought that divine lovers couldn't hurt each other. That the thought of the other being hurt was unbearable?"

"What has he done to you?" Deacon asked from behind us leaning against the house.

I sighed. It wouldn't do any good to tell them, but I could tell by their faces they wanted to know either way.

"We've hurt each other." I said vaguely.

"Spit it out." Deacon growled.

"You just have to remember that I'm alive and well now. So anything that I tell you, has already happened. Don't lash out." I said looking at both of them. I turned my gaze to Zaq, Zef, and Fran walking out to the porch as well.

With a big sigh, I relayed all of the fights between Arowin and I. Starting from the beginning when I thought I killed him. Skipping over the sexual parts... that seemed irrelevant. When I thought he would break my back. When I accidentally put a virus on Keerly. At the mansion when we fought. When I thought he would really drown me. Part of me thought, he wouldn't actually kill me... but in that moment it felt like he would.

"There has to be a way to sever the bond." Deacon spit with so much hatred in his voice.

"Even as the high priestess, I don't think there's a way." I sighed. "My only options are to kill him and take myself out too, or... that's all I've come up with so far."

Zaq and Zef looked upset. They were muttering things to themselves, Zaq even punched at the bricks of the porch. Fran wiped a tear from her face and Deacon wrapped an arm around her. I don't want them to be upset because of me.

Everhett placed a hand on my back and rubbed a few times. "You will never be hurt by him again." He tried to assure me.

I smiled at his words, but I knew the future would inevitably end with Arowin and I being hurt or dead. I was more confident in my abilities, but Arowin's strength and determination always sent a shiver down my spine.

"We're a family, Gweneria." Zaq spoke. "We protect our own. Let us come with you. When you go to kill Gerin, let us be your unit. You don't have to go alone." He pleaded.

I looked around at everyone and they nodded. I just didn't want anything to happen to them. What if something went wrong and they were hurt, or killed. Once Gerin saw they were my weakness he would go after them.

"I just don't want to risk it. I know you guys can help me, and protect me, but I don't need it. I can handle Gerin on my own. We don't know the magnitude of his power, so I'm really the only one that could be prepared." I said.

"We appreciate your concern, but how can you sit there and expect us to let you go alone into something like that. You said it yourself, you don't know his capabilities, wouldn't that suggest you need all the backup you can get?" Everhett spoke with agitation and worry.

"I don't know his capabilities, but I know mine. I can't walk in there with you all at risk. You are by no means weak, but you're my weakness. The second I show an ounce of care for any of you he will use that against me. If it's just him and I, I can end him efficiently."

"And what about unpredictability? You can't possibly know that everything will go smoothly?" Zaq said.

"Exactly. Which is why I need as few variables as possible. If all of you are in there, then that will warrant Kings Guards on top of Gerin and I. What I need is for everyone to lure the King's Guards away from him. Isolate him. I know you don't want me to go alone, but I believe this strategy would be the best option. If you still aren't satisfied then you can come up with a secondary emergency plan. If I need help I can call for someone or give a signal." I suggested.

Everyone still looked uneasy, but at least somewhat in apprehensive agreement.

"You'll have an hour." Deacon spoke with finality. "Get in and kill him. After an hour we're coming to find you."

I didn't like the time limit, but from the look on his face and the tone of his voice I wasn't going to get any more than that. An hour seemed long enough, but that would be eaten up a good bit just by getting inside and navigating through guards.

Everhett didn't look pleased, but remained silent.

"If that's the only thing you'll agree to, I guess that's the way it will go." Zaq said with a sigh.

Zef gave me a half smile, but I could see the dislike hidden behind his eyes. It was quite a contrast to his normal flirtatious and lighthearted self. He got up and left without a word. Zaq followed behind him without looking at me. Fran tried to call after them, but was ignored. She gave me an apologetic smile and ran after them into the house. I looked at Deacon and Everhett, but they too were avoiding my gaze. Everhett blew a deep breath out and placed a hand on my knee sympathetically while looking out at the sky. He then stood and went into the house without a single word or look.

I hated this feeling. I didn't want them to be mad at me. Couldn't they see I was trying to protect them? My eyes burned as I desperately tried to force the tears back. Why couldn't they just trust me.

Deacon walked up behind me and place a hand on my head. The gesture opened the flood gates and tears streamed down my face. I felt slightly abandoned when they all walked away. They needed space and time, but it still hurt. Deacon silently comforting me was what I needed. I used to hate being touched, but with him it was different. With all of them it was different. I didn't want them to get hurt. If the cost of keeping them safe was them being mad at me, so be it.

Once the tears stopped and I wiped my face he turned me to face him. He held my face in his hands so I could only look up at him. His eyes roamed my face affectionately. He doesn't speak much and doesn't like to express his emotions, but I could see the emotions in his eyes. I didn't know if it was simply because it was exhausting hiding them all the time or if he trusted me enough. Either way it made me feel connected to him. He trusted me and I trusted him.

With great surprise to me, he sent me a genuine smile. His perfectly straight white teeth beamed at me with confidence. He chuckled at my surprised expression. He tucked my hair behind my ears and his smile vanished. His face hardened and I stiffened.

"You are brave. You can do anything you put your mind to, but that doesn't mean you have to. I'm giving you one hour because I have trust in you. After the hour is up, I'm coming to get you." His voice held such intensity, but I knew behind his stern words was his concern and care.

I simply nodded and he too stepped inside the house leaving me standing alone. I knew he agreed with the others and wanted to go in with me, but he also knew how I felt. He wasn't happy with my decision, but he was supporting me in his own way.