Trained For Sin

Chapter 56

Warning: This Chapter Contains Sexual Content

The clock read eleven o'clock at night as I sluggishly stumbled into the kitchen to attempt to make a decent dinner. My eyes were puffy and dull from crying and the lack of sleep I've had. Taking my sleep deprivation and restlessness and using it to pack Rose and I's things to go back to Oregon without Nathan. And I was dreading the conversation I was going to have with Rose.

Nick and Stephanie went back to their own home a few days ago to carry on with their own lives and jobs. Valerie was out at a club with Eve not before they desperately pleaded and bribed me to tag along with them. But I couldn't bring myself to get all dressed up and pull myself together long enough to fake being happy and social. Jane and Emily were having a sleepover with Rose and the rest of their children.

The home was eerily quiet with only Finn as he slept upstairs soundly. It was different from its usual lively atmosphere from everyone trying to cheer me up like everything was going well. Acting as though everything has been the same as it ever was.

Reheating leftovers in complete silence forcing me to overthink about anything and everything. I heard the doorbell ring making me jump quickly walking towards the door. "That was fast." I muttered expecting Valerie and Eve to show up drunk hours from now. "I told you, Eve you should just make a key. You practically live here any-" I said opening the door to Nathan.

My soft smile wiped away as my stomach sank. Stepping backwards looking up at him like a fish out of water. He wore his usual pristine and expensive work attire, his dark black hair perfectly styled with soft stubble growing. Looking almost exactly the same as the first time I met him.

His dark blue eyes stared down at me with pity and a heavy heart. I couldn't imagine how I must've looked to him in this moment hoping the dim lighting would mask my puffy eyes and tear stained face. "May I come in?" Nathan asked making me snap out of my trance.

"Yeah." I breathed moving out of the way opening the door wider. "O-Of course. It's your apartment after all." I said calmly as I closed the door tearing my eyes away from him. "If you're here to kick me out don't worry I plan on leaving soon. The apartment will be all yours again." I said making Nathan look at me.

"Leaving?" He asked caught off guard. "We're going back to Oregon since there's nothing left for me to do here. And you deserve to have your place back." I explained nervously, unable to look him in the eye for very long.

Feeling the strands of hair that fell out of my bun as I fidgeted picking at the skin around my nails. Looking down at my black satin lace trim cami nightgown. "That's not why I've come." Nathan replied making me look up at him with a tense expression not wanting to get into another argument.

"So, then what do you want? What are you doing here?" I asked frustrated making him scoff through a weak chuckle. "I'm doing very well, Genevieve. Thank you for asking." Nathan replied sarcastically smiling stepping closer to me.

"Look," I sighed heavily trying to keep myself together. "this whole platonic acquaintances thing, or whatever this is-" I motioned between us. "is new to me. I can't just flip a switch from overwhelming lust struggling to keep one another's clothes on to 'Hi, how are you doing? Do you remember me yet?' overnight." I spit frustrated.

"I can't be here anymore. I can't see you like this when you don't have any ounce of remembrance of us while my heart aches for you. I need to continue on with my life like you have. At least attempt to." I corrected knowing how horrible that would be for me.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm trying to adjust and do what's best. If not for us, then for Rose and Finn. This is me trying to make sure everyone around me is safe a-and happy while I'm completely falling apart." I breathed struggling to keep my tears at bay. "Trying to do the right thing by everyone." I cried softly as Nathan's face softened.