Can you really love me ? Book 2

Can you really love me ? Chapter 2

Hola🤭 well I don't wanna take to much of your time so I'll just start
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I went to the roof and I wanted to jump but I couldn't not yet at least  and I felt like screaming but I couldn't. I just cried and cried and I can tell ain't nobody going to the roof and just felt like a huge knife in my back. I loved Shoto and now he's with the guy I bullied. I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH, I'm just an attention seeking whore and dumbass who doesn't even know how to treat people, I just want to die. I lost the love of my life again. The guy who I would stay up with every night, the same guy who I will kiss and cuddle me in his arms and said sweet things to me and makes me worth something even if I didn't feel it and the same guy who would make me feel better or faint from how hot he was . I cried and cried, my eyes got to be puff, I got a hoodie from my backpack and headed downstairs to my class and went inside to my seat and looked at the window and made me think of the times where I was calm and happy for once. I grabbed my journal from my bag and started writing everything that was hard to say but many will think that will help with me but it doesn't I'm so fucked up I have to hurt myself to keep myself alive but why, why am I ALIVE but then the word die circled around my head DIE,DIE,DIE and so on. But then realized I was having trouble breathing. I started messing with my bracelet and it helps a lot with times like these . " Kasuki what's up with you , you seem sad today Izuku and others are worried about you " Shoto asked coming in the room " it's the first day I'm fine but even if I was sad it's probably because I'm your forgotten toy that you left behind and never came back for and got a new person and didn't even bother to text me and did you even have feelings for me in the first place ?" I asked holding back my tears and showing my anger side " I know what I did was wrong but while I was training I thought you would moved on and never need me anymore so I just moved on and never looked back and now I'm dating a 'great' guy " he said as his eyes lit up I think or did I imagine " congratulations I guess" as I gave him my best fake smile ever " Now leave ICY-HOT" I said but as soon he left I cried but at least I had an hour before class.

In class
" well I'm not in the mood to teach so please let me sleep," Dad said as he went into his sleeping bag and slept. " Kacchan how's the first day be honest " Izuku said with a smile and I know he's scared of me " shitty  " I said with my regular annoyance face " why did you say tell mom that I'm dead so she wouldn't worry?" Izuku asked " I don't want to talk about it " I said but then Shitty hair came over " hey Bakubro and Miyobro" Shitty hair said with blushed and looking at Izuku and then Izuku had blush on his face " h-hey Kirishima how are you" Izuku said with his smile what am I looking at the most nicest people are blushing like two hot tomato's but isn't Shoto dating Izuku but this is good right that Izuku likes someone else but I can't, I can't, I can't handle this and I just said I needed to go the bathroom.
Third person POV:
The angry ash-blonde just ran himself to the bathroom and cried and cried and got his pocket knife and cut himself and went down his lists
1- I'm weak and useless
2- the reason my mother and father in prison
3- the reason Shoto broke up with him
4- I can't just die
5- being an attention seeking whore
6- actually thinking people care about him
7- being freak all the time
8- being a dick most of the time

Third person POV:
The cuts was deep-ish and the dark red liquid flows out and while the angry ash blonde cry's as he's anxiety taking control . The half n half boy is walking to the bathroom having a bad feeling in his gut that someone is hurting " hello ? Whoever you are, are you okay?" The half n half boy asked and looking into the stalls to see who's crying but then sees someone in one of stalls and it's none other than his ex who he still loved  . Also the half n half boy is falling out of love with his current partner who looks like he might be falling in love with someone else but they both agreed to break up if they fall in love with someone else. The half n half walked to the bathroom stall and knocked " Kasuki please let me in" the angry ash-blonde got up and opened the stall door and hugged the half n half boy and the half n half boy hugged back it reminded them of when they use to date.
Kasuki POV:
I really wanted to kiss Shoto so bad but I had to stop myself

A week later
Shoto POV:
I woke up and got ready for school but stopped just as I hear my Dad yelling at Natsuo I can tell by the other voice cries and I just hate my so called' Father' he just abuses me and my siblings and he put my mom in the hospital and she stays there to rot and I hate it and he made me break up with Kasuki and I had to move on Kasuki was perfect and beautiful and super cute I love him more than anything but when dad found out he made me train for 1 year and 6 months and he took me out of the country to be his punching bag and to be teach to be a ' pro hero ' which was totally bull shit if you ask me and I'm so fucking weak and useless like why can't my father love me or say his proud of me at least I would be happy at that right? I went downstairs and tried to be quiet because the yelling stopped " Shoto !" I froze and turned around standing there. I don't even like calling him his real name or even father or dad " yes " I said trying not to stutter because endeavor hates it when I do and beats the shit out of me. That kinda made me laugh at myself for cursing like Kasuki does. I miss him and me and Izuku decided to break up tomorrow so one more day until then.
" you better not have no distractions like last time or I'll make it 3 years I have all the time in the world " he said with his booming voice and sadly that's what I'm scared of the 'time' " I'll be late for school father and I know you don't want me to, do you? " I asked and my breath was really short but my heart is beating so fast " ok we'll be off then " He said as I walked to the door to see Natsuo in the corner crying and he's all bloody I see him in the corner of my eye just as I want to turn my head " do want that for you too if not I suggest you better get out "  he said now yelling at me I practically ran out the house. Because I knew Natsuo would hate me to save him and get tortured with him and know because he told me once before. I got to UA and went inside to see Izuku talking to Kirishima and I'm happy he found love, he was empty when I met him because he thought his childhood best friend died or forgot about him but I bring light to his days as he do to mine but we both realized we are not meant for each other so we agree on to date other people when we found the ones and still be best friends and seems to be working out for him , Katsuki made me into a enemy less than one day but that's to them but when we are alone together we are friends but not lovers. " Hey Izuku and Kirishima, " I said as I sat next to them at the same desk as them " hey dude um if I'm not lying aren't you guys dating? " Kirishima asked me and Izuku looked at each other for a second and then nod " we are but we are breaking up tomorrow because we both like other people and of course we going to be friends but not lovers tho " Izuku said explaining the situation but then Izuku held Kirishima hands and looked into his eyes with a blush " will you go out on a date with me " Izuku said looking deep into his eyes but to make it not cheating "  Izuku before Kirishima gives you his answer I want to know that we'll always be best friends and I'm breaking up with you" I said and then Izuku nod and then continued " yes I will" Kirishima said happily and then I got up to give those two some privacy. I walked away to see Katsuki walking towards the school and I followed him not in a creep way I think. I still have deep feelings about Kasuki and I want him to know I love him and his my whole world " hey Katsuki can we talk?" I asked
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So I didn't know who to put Izuku with so I chose Kirishima and Ik there's going to be hate but I don't care they would never hurt each other cuz they so nice 🥺🥺🥺