Unexpected Love

13. Making Decisions

I decided to call my dad, it's been a while since the last time we talked. We normally talk every day, but he knows it's kinda hard to keep in touch when I'm traveling. I wanted to tell him of the possibility of extending my trip until June and wanted his advice.

—"Hey my bud! How are you? How was the concert? Did you have fun? When are you flying back? Are you still coming home in summer?"

—"Hey Daddy, I'm fine. How are you?"

—"I'm fine, as always... just hanging out at home, going out for breakfast with your uncles every once in a while, and missing your mom every single day. But tell me how're you doing?"

—"Oh, Daddy, we all miss mom. I'm doing just fine, I met some very nice people, and the concerts have been great." — (oops! I just pluralized 'concert')

—"What do you mean 'concerts'? did you go to more? Who's show did you go to?"

—"Well, the people I met invited me to all three dates here; as a matter of fact, they're inviting me to the remaining US concerts ."

—"Wow! You met some of the organizers?" Are you going to go with them?"

I told my dad who I met and asked him to be discrete about it, not even my sisters could know. Then, without any details, I told him that Yoongi wanted me to go with him to all the concerts, including the Asian Tour. I told him how long that would take, and what it could imply. Then, I started sobbing a bit and told him I didn't know what to do. We talked for over half an hour, and by that point, I guess my dad kind of knew there was something going on between Yoongi and me.

—"Bud, you always overthink things, I mean, how wouldn't you? You have such a brain that makes everything fall into place. But, Isabella, I think you need to follow your heart again, ever since Sebastian and Esperanza were gone you shut off that part of you... Bud, I think it's time for you to enjoy life a bit more. So, honey, I say 'go with the flow' and live your life to the fullest, you know you have my blessing."

—"Thank you, Daddy! This means the world to me! Listen, I gotta go, I need to start organizing everything then. I love you!"

I asked the staff to drive me to my hotel, gave Aby a call, and asked her to meet me at a coffee shop two blocks away. Once I got to my room I started organizing my things as a million thoughts ran wild in my head. I thought about my practice, my studies, my home, my dog, my family in my hometown... and Aby. How was I going to tell her I was leaving with Yoongi instead of her? This was our last day here, and I was going to leave with Yoongi.

I met Aby a couple of hours later, She was glowing! She told me about the ARMYs she met, exchanged numbers with them, and even planned a vacation trip to Seoul next September. Then she took my hand over the table.

—"How are you? How do you feel? It kinda sucks that we have to leave tomorrow. Will you meet the boys again later today to say goodbye?"

—"Uhmm, Aby, I'm not going back to Mexico yet. I'm going with Yoongi for the rest of the US tour, as a matter of fact, he asked me to go with him for the remaining dates of the tour."

—"Wait, what do you mean all the tour? Are you actually thinking to say yes? Bella, that's for another two months... What about your life back home? What about me? I mean, I'm so happy about all this going on between you and Suga, but..." — She cried a bit and went silent for a moment. — "Have you really thought about all this? you're a thinker! I've never seen you just follow your gut on something like this."

—"I know Aby, and when you say it, it does sound crazy. And it's true that I'm a thinker, but just I while ago I spoke to my Dad... he told me it's time to follow my heart, and I do want to follow my heart Aby! it has been aching for so long now that I want to take care of it and heal. Please tell me you understand."

—"I do... and I support you because I love you, you are my sister by choice! But I still think that this is too much for you, and it's going to hurt you once it's over. Bella, you are falling for him! Ok, I know you can't tell me anything about your time with him, but I know you, and I can see in your eyes that you are falling for him. Bella..."

Aby's words hit me hard, I only thought about the good time I could have during all this, I really didn't think about how this could affect my feelings afterward. I started thinking about how my fantasies with Suga started, how they started to escalate up to the point that I called out his name during sex with Pablo, and how my dreams became something I needed in my everyday life. Oh my! Am I falling in love? How could this be? I barely know him!

<click in my brain> My brain kicks the heart out of the way and starts running analytically. I do know Yoongi, through my research I learned everything about him, his background, childhood, feelings, personality... almost everything! So, without even seeing it coming, I skipped forward 100X in the process of any sentimental relationship and started falling for him the moment we made love, I mean, the moment we had sex...

Bella.... it was only sex! Sex!

Oh no! I can't go with Yoongi, I can't do this to him, or me.

Aby was still looking at me, and she could see that what I was thinking was not good.