Denying Love - (Will Singe/The Collective Fan Fic)

Chapter 21

Was in such a rush I forgot to dedicate the last chapter lol. So the last one is dedicated to @Foxal90 because I've noticed she's being commenting a lot lately and this chapter goes to @angelicachristina90 because I love our little chats we have and her feedback on the story xx

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Chapter 21

Wills POV

"Rose" I shouted in disbelief staring at scene that tore my heart. 

There stood the girl I loved who had just jumped out of another guys arms. I never knew my heart could burn so much. I felt as if I had been set on fire.

I could feel tears threatening to fall out of my eyes as the searing pain got worse.

"Will, I..." she started but I cut her off. I didn't want to hear it.

"I know we're not dating" I said putting up my hand to silence her. "I know technically you can do whatever you want" 

"Will" she tried again but I wasn't going to let her speak.

"You knew how I felt Rose" I shouted gritting my teeth. "You knew how much I liked you and don't deny it because I was a damn open book" 

My breathing grew more heavy and so did the weight in my chest. She looked at me her eyes watering but I couldn't make myself feel bad for her when I felt like this.

"And then you kissed me Rose" I cried out. "You kissed me out of everything you could have done. Do you know how long I've wanted to kiss you for?" I asked balling up my fist.

A tear escaped her eye as she was lost for words. "I've wanted to kiss you for so long and for a second there I was happy, no I was estatic" I gritted my teeth together and kept going. It was my turn to speak. "I even started to think that maybe there was a chance of me falling in love with you" 

The whole place had gone silent now and everyone around us was paying close attention to the conversation. Tears were still spilling down her face and this time I couldn't control one that leaked down mine.

"But thankyou Rose" I laughed sarcastically. "Thankyou for giving me the experience of a damn crushed heart" 

That was it and I was done. I didn't give her any time to respond before I turned on my heels and started crashing past people to get out.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and Trent call my name but I shrugged it off and stormed outside. Now it was my turn to be confused. 

I started walking fast down the street unsure of where I was going. All I wanted to do was get out of there and far away.

How could she do this to me? What wrong had I ever done her? All i had ever done was be nice and heck I'd even done my very best to hold back and in return she tore out my heart.

It wasn't as if I pushed her. She kissed me. She clearly kissed me and I knew alcohol wasn't to blame because she hadn't had that much to drink.

I felt a hand on my shoulder again which spun me around. The feeling of anger coursing through me made me want to punch who ever spun me around but I didn't and thank god I didn't. Because when I turned I came face to face with a worried Julian.

Part of me wanted to scream at him to leave me alone but the other half knew he was doing nothing wrong. He wasn't the cause of all this. All he was doing was checking up on one of his best friends.

"Will" he said but then came to a loss of words and just looked at me in pity.

"Don't" I said waving him off and started walking again.

"Just wait" he spun me around again.

"For what Julian?" I cried. "I know you want to tell me everything is ok but it's not"

He gave me a sad expression. He looked helpless and he was because I was certain that nothing he said right now would make me feel better.

"I feel like shit Jules" I said shaking my head. "I just need to be alone now ok?" 

"Ok" he nodded sadly and I turned away continuing to walk to god knows where.

I finally let the tears fall down my face. Yeah boys cry to. Especially when they have a huge hole in their chest where their heart is suppose to be.

The pain was so intense that I wasn't even sure physical pain would be able to master it. It's moments like this that you believe you'll never heal.

I decided to get out my phone and open twitter. I tried to do what I usually did when I was upset and send out a tweet. This one read "Music won't break your heart" because right now it was the only thing that made sense in my head.

Music was the only thing that wouldn't break my heart. It would express it, and maybe even mend it. But it was never the reason for the damage there.

But unlike all those other times. It didn't make me feel better at all. So I had to do more. I decided to copy all those rediculous movies. The scenes that you watch and seem to have effect but you don't think they would work in real life.

I made my way towards a lake I knew was nearby. I listened to the sound of my feet against the concrete as I walked. I started to feel little drops of water on the back of my neck and before I knew it, it was pouring down raining. 

The rain pelted down soaking my clothes and I knew that at this time of night I should be cold but I was already numb. Numb from the pain throughout my body.

I saw the lake up ahead and sped up my walking towards it. I just wanted to get this over with. I walked up onto the bridge that went over it and stopped dead in the middle. Leaning on the side.

I looked over at the water with all the rain drops splashing along it before lifting myself up onto the ledge. I looked down below my feet at the dark water before looking back up at the night sky. And then I did it...

I screamed out at the top of my lungs.

"Why me!" I screamed throwing my hands in the air. "What did I do!?"

The rain started to wash away my tears but i was afraid it wasn't doing enough.

"All I wanted was to give you love Rose! " I yelled, the rain and wind masking my cries. "All I wanted to do was to love you and help you and you broke me apart"

"I didn't deserve this damn shit!"

"I don't deserve to feel like this" 

Once I'd finished I gasped for breath. This was supposed to make me feel better. And it didn't. Because now I only felt hollow. I didn't know what to feel anymore. 

I picked up a stone that sat by my feet and tossed it as far as I could but in doing so I slipped. I lost my footing and I tried to regain it but it was too late. 

Before I knew it I was falling straight down into the icy lake below.

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I'm cheeky... but please don't hate me. Please comment and tell me what you think coz out of the 21 voters on the last chapter I got 4 commenters and I would love to hear what the rest of you are thinking :P

Time to eat my Maccas!!!

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x Shez x

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