Set Me Free |Jonas Brothers

14

"Ruby..." Nick says.

I shake my head, "I need to take a walk."

"Okay." He says, and takes a step back as I walk past him, off the porch and onto the sidewalk.

I'm not familiar with the area but it's a semi small town, so I follow the sidewalk as long as my feet would take me.

What is wrong with me?

You like Nick.

No I don't.

Then you would have easily said that to Joe.

You hesitated.

It's almost dark when I make it back to the Jonas'. I feel horrible that my drama ruined their holiday. They didn't deserve that.

When I walk in, Denise and Kevin Sr. are seated on the couch, watching Kevin and Danielle's two small daughters play with some toys.

Denise smiles sympathetically when she sees me. She gets up and immediately gives me a hug, which makes me want to instantly cry.

"I don't know what's going on my dear, but don't feel bad about what happened. We are so happy to have you."

She pulls away and wipes a stray tear off of my cheek, "Thank you Denise."

"Kevin and Nick and Danielle are outside by the fire. Joes up in his room, hopefully sleeping and sobering up."

I nod, "I think I'm going to get some sleep too."

As I make my way to my room, I walk past an open door. I don't look in, but I hear a voice just as I pass.

"Ruby?"

I take a few steps backwards to the doorway. Joe is seated on the end of his bed. His expression is soft.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Can we talk?"

I sigh, "Are you still drunk?"

"Seeing as how I feel like shit, probably not."

I shut the door behind me and walk over to sit beside him on his bed. His curls are wet against his neck, fresh out of the shower. His white tee shirt has droplets on it. He smells good, but he always does.

"I'm so sorry Ruby. I shouldn't have said what I did at dinner. It was uncalled for. I was drunk and I was jealous. It doesn't excuse what I did, but that's why." He looks right at me as he speaks, but I keep my gaze to my hands on my lap.

"It's fine Joe, it's not like I haven't done anything to hurt you. I deserved it."

"No. You didn't deserve it. You've been through things I can't even imagine, things I don't even know. The last thing you need is me being a dick to you. I understand why you'd choose Nick."

I finally look at him, and he's watching me with sad eyes. "I didn't pick anyone Joe. Nick and I aren't together."

"But you like him."

"I liked you first." I tell him.

"Liked." He says.

I sigh, "Joe, the moment we shared when you brought me back home meant so much to me. Everything I told you about my mom, I haven't told anyone, not even Nick. But I wasn't prepared to run into Mike at the hayride. I didn't want to tell you more of my fucked up past. I didn't want you to realize how damaged I am. How wrong I am for you."

He reaches for me, and I let him. He cups my face in his hands, scanning my face, "Nothing you say to me could make me think that."

"I freaked out that night, because my ex boyfriend was there." He let's go of my face, but grabs my hand, holding it between the two of his.

"We were together for a while, and he started to slowly change. But I ignored the red flags until it was too late. He started hurting me." My eyes fill with tears as I begin to remember some of the things he did.

Joe waits patiently for me to continue, rubbing his thumb over my fingers.

"He hurt me physically, mentally, forced me to have sex with him when I didn't want to. I thought I was stuck with him, I had no one to turn to for help. But it got so bad I was sure I'd end up dead if I stayed with him so I left. He only got one year of jail time. I hadn't seen him since and I was terrified of running into him at the hayride."

His face turns pale as I speak to him, most likely from what I've told him Mike has done. He lets out a shaky breath, and for a moment I thought he may cry, "I wish you had told me."

"I know. But I was having a panic attack, and I reacted in a way that's typical for me. Because I'm not used to having someone care about me, I'm just used to pushing everyone away."

"I want to be there for you." He looks down at our entwined hands.

"I know." I tell him, "Joe, I've been crazy about you since we met. I just didn't allow myself to act on it, because I'm scared. I haven't been with anyone since my ex. All I've known is pain, and loss. You're the first person since him that I've allowed to touch me."

He slowly reaches up and runs his fingertips down my cheek. I close my eyes and lean into him.

"I really care about you Ruby Mae." He slowly leans in, and kisses me gently on the cheek. My breath hitches at the feeling of his lips on my skin.

I move my face towards his, and our lips brush against each other, sending a deep chill down my spine.

"Can I kiss you?" He whispers against the corner of my lips.

I take a deep breath, "Yes."