It Takes Time

21

Aizawa was trying to follow Y/N, he was trying to fix what he had done. He didn't know why he had said what he had said. He had no idea why he was admitting to her that he had feelings for her. It made no sense to him. It had just come out in the moment. He hadn't even realised what he had just said until it was too late for him. He couldn't believe that he had just confessed to her. But was it really that bad?

Judging from her reaction, it was. He had expected many things, but he hadn't really expected her to run away from him. That was why he was a little slow in his reaction, but he got up and went after her, trying to calm her down, trying to talk about it. He knew that things were going to be awkward if this wasn't resolved. So, he wanted to make sure to clear the air, to make things easier for both of them.

But Y/N was pretty much already gone. He had called after her, but she didn't seem to hear anything. Aizawa wasn't sure what to do. She had told him not to text her, and he wasn't sure whether he should listen to her or not. Maybe if he just sent one single text, apologising for everything?

But what if her husband was still monitoring her texts? Would that make things worse for her? Maybe he should wait a few days. Aizawa was helplessly overwhelmed with the situation. He didn't know what to do or how to cope with it, so he just went on with his day as usual. He almost felt like he was in some sort of trance. Everything that happened seemed to be happening somehow very far away.

Almost as if he was trapped in his own head – and maybe that was exactly what was happening. Maybe he was trapped within his own head and that was why he was so incredibly awkward around all these other people. Maybe that's why he didn't know what to do or how to handle situations half the time.

Aizawa considered that maybe he did need help. Help with his drinking, help with getting over Oboro's death. But when was he going to do all that? He barely had the time to keep himself alive and well-fed. He wouldn't have time to see a therapist or something like that. But maybe he would have to take the time for it. He was sure that he wouldn't be able to go on like this, not for much longer.

But that was something he could think about later. He wasn't surprised that Y/N didn't show up for work the rest of the week. She was probably taking some time at home to sort herself out and Aizawa couldn't blame her. He was sure she'd be back on Monday, and he was planning not to hound her over this whole thing. In his mind, he had done enough damage already, so he was going to leave her alone.

It was pretty demotivating talking to Nemuri and Hizashi, even though they insisted that he had done the right thing and all. He didn't feel like he had done the right thing. He felt like he had made things much, much worse. But Nemuri seemed to be sure that Y/N just hadn't known how to react, that she was overwhelmed with the situation and that she didn't think he was a terrible person for having feelings for her. She even thought that it was maybe for the best that everything was out in the open.

Aizawa wasn't sure about that, but he did follow Nemuri's advice of sending Y/N a text over the weekend. Aizawa spent so long crafting the best response he could possibly come up with that he only sent the text Sunday afternoon. Of course, there was no reply. It wasn't like Aizawa had expected one.

He still spent all weekend thinking about what he might have said or done differently. He barely got any sleep over this whole episode, and it made him even more irritable and grumpy than usual. Aizawa knew it wasn't a good mix. He was annoyed enough just having to deal with a bunch of teenagers, and he was still not okay after what happened with Y/N. Throwing lack of sleep into the mix would be bad.

But thankfully, Aizawa made it through the entire week without having to go down to the office. He didn't even see Y/N in the hallways of the school, but he didn't really think anything was off. Maybe she was just trying to avoid him, and he couldn't blame her for that. It was at the end of the week that he had to go down to the office himself to grab some forms. He had been dreading it all day, but after classes had finished, he finally made his way down and knocked on the door, feeling nauseous.