It's because I feel that life has pointed it's gun at me...
And then the trigger was pulled today.
-
"Sorry, I gotta take this." I excused myself from the table and went to answer the phone call. It was Phil and his contact display name flashed across the screen.
"Hello Phil!" I greet him with a cheery tone. "Erm, hey Am." He sounds really unsure and nervous. "You okay? You sound very nervous y'know.." I trailed off. "Sorry. It's just that I need to tell you something."
"Uhm okay.. shoot."
"The book tour is going to start sooner than I thought and it's because by popular demand we're going to travel more locations and so-" He paused.
"We're leaving in six more days." He finished.
"O-oh." Was all that I said. What was I going to do? Yesterday when I had another breakdown Dan and Phil both came in with a mini tub of ice cream and we watched several episodes of Pokemon.
I tried not being a total wuss but it didn't work. Tears brimmed my eyes and I hated myself for not holding them in.
"That's good then. You get to meet more people who adore you and idolise you!" I cheered. "You can come by the flat if you want.." He offered.
"Sure but will you guys be available around," I paused to look at my watch. "6-ish because I'm in the middle of something."
"I have a meeting for the new book tour schedule now so I am really really sorry." He sighed.
"Honestly it's fine. We'll still keep in touch, alright?"
"Alright. Oh and I gotta go.. Dan's shouting at me for not cleaning the dishes. Bye sis."
"Bye bro." And which that I hung up the phone call and return to the table where all of the YouTubers were chatting away on whatever they're talking about.
I took a deep breath and sat down on my chair, staying silent for a while until Joe decided to talk to me.
"You okay? You've been staring off into space for a little while now." Joe asked. "Uhm yeah. I'm good. I just have a thing on my mind." I shrugged.
"Shall I ask what that is then?"
I cleared my throat, "I'd rather you not." I threw in a fake laugh to make it seem believable. "Is it because the twitter fight?" He kept his voice low, glancing at Alfie and Zoe who were chatting away.
"No.. Sorta.. Maybe? I don't know."
He opened his mouth as he was about to say something but he was cut off by Alfie. "Oy what are you guys doin' then?" He asked. "Alfie." Zoe hit his arm softly.
"Amity was just-" Joe started but I cut him off.
"FINE. Amity was just fine." I finished his sentence. "Okay.. You sure you're alright? You're acting weird." Alfie says.
"What? You barely know me.. of course I'm fine!" They should just stamp on the word 'liar' on my head to be honest.
"Listen, I gotta go! But it's been soo lovely meeting you guys and hanging out." And that was what I said to get out of this situation.
"Aw really? This early?" Zoe asked. "Yeah.. So so sorry." I apologised.
"Well it's been fun." I said as I stood up. As soon as I do everyone stood up too and engulfed me in a group hug.
"Wait you don't have our numbers?" Alfie said and it turned more into a question. "It's 2015 Alfie, we have social media." I chuckled.
"Alright then, bye guys!" I waved and received a chorus of goodbye's from them.
-
The ride home was quite sad and lonely s I took the emptiest bus ever.
Actually there was a guy in the back sleeping.. I wonder if he is okay.
I arrived at home with a text from Dan.
From: Dan [0 . 0]
To: Me
Me and Phil are soo sorry
I replied as I entered the house.
From: Me
To: Dan [0 . 0]
It's all good :)
Mum and dad weren't home and they left a note on the kitchen counter saying they would be home late because they had a dinner with their friends.
Meanwhile in Amity's social life..
Cue video of an explosion.
With that thought in my head I walked up the stairs and into my room. The negative thoughts came through my mind again and I sorta brushed it off.
When I've already changed into more comfy clothes I went onto tumblr, immediately getting a lot of asks (or whatever you call them) about my twitter fight and why I have gone missing and the most recent post was two days ago.
Which was true.. I was online the whole time I just was going through pictures and posts without liking or reblogging or showing anything that says I'm online.
While Rockets To Infinity seemed perfectly fine of my absence and were carrying on promoting their album and making a new music video.
Some people asked me if i was okay but I didn't reply because I was really not.
Because my idiot brother and his idiot best friend aren't going to be here to help me get through this.
They aren't gonna be in the same city.
I'll have to get through it on my own if they aren't going to be here..
But I have to learn how to do it first.
Because I remember the day when my life was perfectly normal. I had friends to laugh with and the moments that I've shared with them are what I miss.
All the colour that painted my life has now faded to grey and all the beautiful memories are shattered like a glass frame.
The smile that once decorated my face has never showed up after I ran away.
The comments that broke my heart stayed with me while the ones that made me happy stick as long as a post-it note sticks to a rock.
It falls whenever the wind blows on it the slightest bit.
This isn't just because of my friends.
It's because I feel that life has pointed it's gun at me...
And then the trigger was pulled today.
-
Whoah that was intense.. if this chapter didn't suck..
BUT ANYWAYS
I graduated oh mah gawd.
Can we like take a moment?
I love you guys so much you don't know.
Be sure to keep smiling and have a great day bc you deserve it sooo much!
Guys! Just to clear up some things here, since technically this story still takes place in march-ish it automatically means that the Amazing Book Is Not On Fire's release in this book is like earlier than irl (in real life).
OmfWhuut I got distracted by 5SOS while writing this chapter
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Back To Square One - Dan and Phil // SLOW UPDATES
Fanfiction[sequel to Tumblr Queen.] The last time you saw her she was happy. The smile on her face was huge but let me tell you, it doesn't last long. A game was what I said her life was like and so my statement was true. What happens next though? Will a stri...
