Forever Sunlight

1. Just Thinking

All my life I have been wondering where I belong. I'm considered half vampire, half human, yet part of me seems to be part werewolf. I guess it's hard to understand that my father is a vampire and my mother was human when she gave birth.  Even though shortly after, she was transformed into a vampire. My whole life has been revolved around vampires except for the fact that the sunlight of my solar system came from a half-human half-werewolf.

    Jacob Black is the only one in my world that is the main event. Not only is he my best friend, but my comfort and security as well. I would be lost without his wisdom to guide me, and without his love to protect and cherish me. He's just there when I need him. I could keep rambling on and on about how he treats me, on how important he is to me. It just has to do with the fact that I've known him all of my life, even before I was born.

    Getting back to the subject, like I said I wonder where I belong. Having vampire parents, and having an amazing werewolf as a soul mate. But me? I'm stuck in between three, wolf, vampire, and human. For 10 years I have been wondering which one I am. I just can't pick one, it's as if I am connected to all three things, and if I break one bond I'll break the others too. I just can't really decide. I'm smart, but not smart enough to figure my problem out. Guess there's some things that family can't teach you after all.

    From the first month of my life I have been home-schooled. It's been now 10 years and I believe I'm ready for a place outside my glass and rock box of a home. Junior year is coming for me, since I look 17. Jacob is supposed to be 26 and in college, but I want him to be a senior, so he can join me in school. It will make not such a perfect match, but my dad is willing to change that to not raise suspicions on our love. I can't decide whether to go to Forks or La Push high. The point of the matter is to be with Jacob since as long as he was with me there was nothing that could go wrong.

    "Renesmee, come down and get some breakfast!" I could hear mom yell in her bell-like voice.

I really loved how she said my name. Making it seem like it was sung by angels.

    "Renesmee listen to your mother you know how she gets." Dad's voice was loud enough.

I loved his voice too. It was like silky chocolate melting in your mouth.

    Before they had a chance to yell my name again, I was downstairs by the kitchen table. Jacob was there like almost every morning.

I kissed his cheek before settling in the chair next to his.

    "Hey Nessie, how did you sleep last night?" He asked me in a husky voice that I loved as well.

    "I slept fine. I'm still deciding whether to go to Forks High or go to school in La Push."

    "Ness you know that Paul and Sam don't really like the fact that you want to go there-"

    "I know" I interrupted. "I am aware of that, but it is still an option isn't it?" I knew he couldn't argue with that.

Jacob would keep quiet just to keep me happy. I really just wanted to see what his old life was like. Ever since my birth, Jake left everything. His friends: except for Seth, Leah, Embry, and Quil. He also left his house, his dad and just everything that had to do with his past life. I knew nothing of his old life except for the stories mom told me. What he did tell me were just little glimpses that I wanted to know more about.

Just when I thought he had left it alone he added. "Why don't I just come to Forks? I mean if I can live here...If I can stay here-"

    "Jacob you know you're more than welcomed here. You've done so much for our family that there's no way I can keep you away from Renesmee." I knew dad started to get along with Jacob because of me, but I never thought that he would actually let him live here! I knew everyone wouldn't mind especially since Jacob, Seth, and Leah have all been around since before I was born.