Forever Sunlight

3. Family Matters

I was sweating bullets as I awoke. My hair was damp and there were huge rings around my torso that burned. I started struggling as I tried to get away from the massive heat wave.

    "Sorry, Ness." Jake unlocked his arms around me and stood up.

    "No it's ok, I'm fine just hot." I said trying to bring him back to me.

    "Still, I don't want you to die in front of me."

    "What are you talking about?"

He pointed to my reflection in the glass coffee table.

I saw myself for the first time in this condition. My face was shaped like dad's only right now instead of my blush it was tomato red and wet; my purple eyelids were now the color of an eggplant. My pink palms were turned hot pink. My curly bronze hair was straight and lumpy. My expression was blank, my eyes one shade lighter than chocolate brown. I looked completely opposite from what I felt and originally looked.

"Maybe you should take a shower. It will make you feel better." Jake suggested with a worried look in his face.

"Okay, I'll be back to make breakfast in a few-"

"Don't worry about it. I'll wait." He cut me off.

Following orders I headed up the stairs to a closet near the bathroom. It was full of clothes, I placed them there just for moments like these. I didn't bother with getting my dad's old bedroom as a closet. It was too far to get to in the morning. I hated the fact that I felt sluggish in the morning, just like a human. I headed for the bathroom clothes at hand. I set my clothes in the sink and turned the knob in the shower. I was in front of the mirror looking at myself; as I took my damp clothes off letting them fall where I stood standing. I had dropped down to the shade of pink. As I got in the shower, I felt the cool water run down my body. It felt good, but liked a warm one better. After a few minutes I was done. I hurried to dry myself and put my clothes on. Jeans and a green shirt; I was simple just like mom.

After I had showered and dressed. I ran for the kitchen. I was on the other side of the doorway making a sharp turn when Jacob caught me and threw me in the air.

"Hey, what the heck!" It slipped out without warning.

"Sorry Nessie." He put me down right away and stepped back.

"Jake, you startled me that's all." I said apologizing. I looked down, holding back tears.

I hated anything I did to keep him away from me. It made me feel like I was a monster.

Mom and dad always told me how outside people would feel if they knew what we were, they would feel afraid and avoid us at all cost. I didn't want to be that, I don't care what I'm supposed to be, I just want to be me.

"Ness, don't, I didn't mean to-" He looked at me wondering what to do. He smiled, it wasn't a full out smile, but it was enough that it cheered me up.

I smiled back.

He rushed to hug and kiss my forehead. "I'm sorry." He whispered. "I...wasn't thinking...I just wanted to surprise you-"

"Jake, you talk too much." I looked up at him. I put my hands to his face.

He closed his eyes.

I let him see exactly how I felt. I showed him the memories of our kisses and the ones of him stepping away from me.

I let my hands slide down to his chest. "I don't want to cause fear; I don't want to be a monster."

He opened his eyes to gaze into mine. "You consider yourself a monster when anyone steps away from you? Nessie you know you're not even like that."