What Life Holds

14

The next day Meredith had another round of chemo and it wasn't necessarily worse than the day before but it definitely wasn't better.
"Please honey just try and eat some lunch" Arizona cooed as she gently rubbed Meredith's back.
"Zona I can't I feel so nauseous every second, I can't please zona" Meredith cried as she looked at Arizona, the nausea she had avoided with her first round of chemo seemed to be hitting her double as hard this time,
"I know honey, and I'm sorry but you need to keep eating, you need to maintain your strength for me and the kids" Arizona cooed, drawing shaped on Meredith's back.
"For you and the kids" Meredith sighed as she picked up her fork and started to eat.
Meredith managed to eat about half of her meal before she couldn't eat anymore,
"I'm so proud of you my love" Arizona cooed moving the table with the food away from Meredith, Meredith began to smile at Arizona, but her expression quickly changed and she tried to reach for the bucket beside her, Arizona quickly responded grabbing the bucket but she wasn't quite fast enough and although most of it made it into the bucket some vomit ended up on Meredith herself, Arizona rubbed Meredith's back gently hoping it brought her wife some comfort, once Meredith had finished throwing up she looked at Arizona with tears in here eyes,
"I'm so sorry my love, thank you for trying to eat and it's ok it's not your fault" Arizona cooed standing up to get rid of the bucket of vomit before returning to Meredith,
"Oh zona I got it on you" Meredith sighed as she realised she managed to throw up on Arizona's top as well as her own.
"That's ok mer, let get you cleaned up, how about we take you for a shower," Arizona cooed, smirking slightly as she mentioned shower
"Zona..." Meredith sighed
"What your still my wife plus maybe I might have to join you seeing as you got vomit on me too" Arizona joked helping Meredith sit up,
"Zona I can't my port wet while I'm getting my..." Meredith sighed pausing, it was still hard to accept she was getting chemo and that she had cancer.
"I know mer I was just trying to make you happy, how about I just help you get changed" Arizona cooed grabbing another set of clothes out of the bag in the corner for Meredith, before helping starting to help Meredith,
"Ccccoolld" Meredith shivered as Arizona pulled down the blanket,
"I'm sorry my love I'll be quick" Arizona replied holding back tears as she she saw her wife shivering, it became even harder to hold back the tears as she she took of the jumper Meredith was wearing and Meredith shaking only increased,
"Oh mer" Arizona sighed quietly as she quickly redressed Meredith, this time putting on an extra jacket before pulling up the blanket, it broke Arizona's heart to see Meredith like this it wasn't a warm day today but it certainly wasn't freezing temperatures reaching 17°C(62°F).
"Is that better honey?" Arizona asked gently stroking Meredith cheek,
"I'm still a little cold" Meredith whispered ashamed she was having to ask Arizona to do this for her but she felt to weak to do it herself, Arizona quickly grabbed another blanket from the cupboard coving Meredith quickly.
"Thank you, zona" Meredith yawned smiling as her wife and reaching out to Arizona's hand.
"No thanks necessary love, now you get some sleep, I'll be right here when you wake up" Arizona cooed leaning in to kiss Meredith head. Meredith smiled back at Arizona before letting her eyes fall shut and drifting off the sleep.

The next day
Meredith had been discharged, and was at home with Arizona. All the kids were at school and they where sitting together watching tv, Meredith was lying in the couch her head in Arizona's lap half asleep,
"How are you feeling Mer?" Arizona asked gently running her finger through Meredith hair,
"Ehh, I've been better but not bad" Meredith replied honestly, she hated feeling like a burden to Arizona but she knew if she didn't tell wife the truth it would just hurt Arizona more.
"That's good to hear my love, I made some sandwiches earlier would you like to try some?" Arizona asked looking down at Meredith, at the thought of food Meredith face changed, and before either of then could react Meredith throw up over both herself and Arizona,
"Oh mer" Arizona cooed, trying to stop her wife from crying as she looked at her with tears in her eyes.
"I'm sorry zona" meredith explained trying not to cry, tear threatening to spill from her eyes.
"Oh mer, it's ok," Arizona cooed grabbing the towel that was hanging over the back of the couch. The nausea had been hitting Meredith hard so Arizona wasn't surprised but just worried for her wife. As Arizona attempted to wife up the vomit she realised it was all in Meredith's hair.
"Come on my love let's clean you up" Arizona cooed, carefully shifting Meredith so they could stand up, Arizona wasn't quite sure how she was going to get Meredith to the bathroom seeing as she wasn't able to lift her but she would figure it out. Just as she thought Meredith stood up, still dizzy from being sick she immediately lost her balance, falling into Arizona. To Arizona's surprise she was able to catch her taking all of Meredith's body weight in her hands. Her heart broke as she lifted Meredith off the ground, although it made it easier for her to help Meredith, for Meredith to be this light meant she was undernourished possible dangerously so. Arizona would worry about that after, she made her way towards the bathroom Meredith in her arms before carefully placing Meredith down and starting to run the bath. Once the temperature was right she carefully started to help Meredith get undressed
"Zona.." Meredith started but stopped
"What up my love is everything ok?" Arizona replied before helping Meredith remove her shirt.
"No never mind, it was stupid" Meredith replied, letting Arizona undress her feeling to weak to do it herself.
"No my love nothing is stupid what is it?" Arizona cooed hoping to help Meredith however possible.
"I was going to ask if you would possibly maybe, get in the bath with me, I miss feeling my body against yours even if mine is broken" Meredith explain hiding her face in her hands.
"Mer I would love to get into the bath without" Arizona exclaimed carefully undressing herself now, before carefully placing Meredith in the bath then climbing in behind her. As Arizona sat down behind Meredith, she felt Meredith lean back into her warmth.
"Does this feel good my love?" Arizona asked, pouring some water over Meredith head so she could wash her hair. Meredith purred as Arizona lathered the lavender shampoo into Meredith's hair. As Arizona went to wash away the shampoo she noticed hair floating in the water around her, as she looked back towards Meredith's head she realised, and her heart broke for her wife.

Authors Note
Sorry for the delay in updating, it's been an interesting time. The first few days of the gap I was away on holidays but then I started back at work, and found out the following day that the school I work at is being shut down so I was frantically trying to figure out what to do next. However the school had been bought out and will remain so I haven't lost my job and should be able to go back to posting regularly.

Anyway hope enjoy please leave suggestions and I will try and take them on board and respond to as many comments as possible.