Hate Is A Strong Word

23.

"What is that again?" Dad says as the doorbell rings throughout the house. It could be around seven in the morning. We're all sitting at the kitchen island. Juro is drinking his usual mug of cocoa, which he thinks is chocolate protein, because he wants to have muscles like Simon. Dad is still finishing breakfast and mom is drinking coffee. We should all be out of the house in a quarter of an hour so that my parents can get to work and Juraj and I can get to school.

Since I overslept today, because I couldn't sleep last night, I'm finishing my makeup in the kitchen. I kept thinking about Sebastian all night, because he's been a total sweetheart this week. He's been so incredibly nice, to the point of where it disgusted me, and I mean that in a good way. I'm not saying I didn't like it, yeah, it's nice when we can study normally without arguing and then he shows me his cell phone with good grades.

I said I wanted him to be good like that, not to think only of himself and stuff, but I'm starting to miss the old Sebastian. The one who's just his own man. I feel like he's trying to make up for the fact that we had a fight and I cried in his arms. That's probably what hurt him the most, seeing me cry. He's too sweet, and I'm tired of it.

"I'm gonna go open the door, the neighbor's dog definitely ran off again." I put the brush down on the counter and get up from the chair. One eye is done, the other isn't, but our old neighbor can't see without her glasses, so she doesn't even notice that my makeup isn't finished. I grab my keys and unlock the door, opening it, but my neighbor isn't standing there looking for her dog. There's someone I wouldn't have expected to be here at all, this early in the morning.

"Hi, Tina."

"Hi." I say in surprise, looking at Sebastian, who's standing outside where it's snowing heavily. He's wearing a hat and has his hands in his pockets. What is he doing here? His cheeks are pink because of the frost and I'm cold just standing here between the doors. "What's going on?"

"Dad needs something from your dad." By then, Robert's bursting through the door. He's beside himself with happiness, but incredibly so. It's Friday the sixteenth of December, seven in the morning, there's a heavy snowstorm outside, and standing between my door is Sebastian and his dad, who has happiness to spare, and it occurs to me that he must be on to something, because he's rather neutral when it comes to feelings and emotions.

"Hi, Tina." The coach of the Czech national team hugs me and I'm so shocked that I just pat him on the back. "Where's your dad?"

"In the kitchen." He takes off his shoes and goes into the kitchen, where I hear him start talking to my dad. I grab Sebastian's hand and pull him into the hallway because he'd still collapse on me. I take off his hat and unzip his jacket because it's warm in here. He's smiling at me and he's happy too. They're really doing something in the family.

"Should I ask or not?" I lean back against the drawer and look at the handsome guy across from me, who's all matching Czech hockey clothes. Wait? A cap with the logo, a jacket with the logo, and a sweatshirt that says Czech Republic. It's seven in the morning and he's dressed completely in the clothes he got from the federation. I'm stupid! They're leaving for Canada today.

How could I forget that? He's actually going to Canada for three weeks, across the ocean. A whole other continent. And I forgot about it. I grab his hands and pull him close. "You're going away." We smile at each other and he grabs my braids and puts them from my back to my shoulders.

"Well. You only got one eye done again." I slap his shoulder for fun and then grab his hand again. We laugh at each other like two assholes who are head over heels in love. What am I going to do without him here. My God, what's he gonna do in Canada without me? How hard it was for him that we hadn't spoken in a week and now he's supposed to be in Edmonton or wherever it is for three weeks. And we're not even dating.