Hate Is A Strong Word

24.

December 24th 2021, a date that is on every cell phone, computer screen or calendar. A day that many children, but also adults, are looking forward to. For me, Christmas Eve represents a full day of calling Simon and watching fairy tales. I don't plan to do anything else and all I plan to do is mentally prepare myself for tomorrow at my grandma's house, where the whole family will be gathered, all of them. From every corner of the country.

When I recover a little from this horrible day of pissed off people, my mom will start freaking out. We've already have packed. All the suitcases are in the small hallway that connects the bigger hallway and the kitchen. We've all tripped over them at least once. Next to them are skis, poles, ski boots and bags with a helmets and goggles. My parents can be glad we have a big car, otherwise we wouldn't have packed everything in there.

The whole twenty-sixth of December will be stressful, although everything will be in perfect order before lunch. Then dad has to grab mom, give her a plate of candy, sit her in front of the TV and put the remote in her hand, or she'll go crazy. Dad then pretends he's doing something, because everything is already there and we're watching cartoons in the meantime. Well, then it's D-Day and we wave hello to the mountains.

It's gonna be nice. If I didn't have this in my life, it would be boring. No seven aunts just on my dad's side, two crazy hockey-playing brothers, my parents, or even my hockey player who now resides in Canada and is currently in his dreamland. He wakes up in the morning, sees the snowy city out the window and realizes it's Christmas. Celebrating Christmas with hockey players, you're getting somewhere.

I don't know what to say about Sebastian right now. I think he's in the best place in his life in a long time. He's a prep star, he's loved in Canada, he's good at hockey, he's there with guys who are his friends and he's living the life. Of course he doesn't know that I have his drawings. I had it in my head and in that day and a half, I figured it was nice. The fact that he just couldn't get me of his head, that he drew and drew and drew.

The hard rectangles that hide the papers with the beautiful drawings still sit on my desk and I have to keep looking at them and keep telling myself, that Sebastian really drew this. I don't know when I'll confront him about it, but it certainly won't be now during the championship. I can't stop thinking about it. It really hit him hard, but it's beautiful. The only thing that's not nice about it, is, that he must have been in a lot of pain.

"Here, Tina." I put the plate in the dishwasher and then turn it on. It starts making a soft noise and I lean against the counter. "What, baby?" She strokes my cheek and I smile at her.

"Nothing. I'm scared, I hope he makes it." The first day of the championship starts in two days, they don't play until twenty-seven at night, but it's against Canada and that's what I'm worried about. I don't want to underestimate them, they're amazing guys and talented, but Canada is Canada.

"Bastian is a smart guy." I smile at her and she smiles back at me. "I almost forgot. Wait here, peach." She tells me and runs away. I just watch and don't understand, maybe I don't even want to understand. After two minutes, she comes back holding a larger black box, which is tied with a red ribbon, in her hands. She sets it down on the kitchen island and I walk over to it.

"This is from an unnamed person." I look at the box and I have a pretty good idea who it's from.

"Isn't he playing hockey now?"

"I don't know." And she goes into the living room to dad and Juraj. I take the ribbon between my fingers and untie it carefully, once it's gone there's nothing stopping me from undoing the lid and seeing what the box contains. The first thing that jumps out at me is just the kind of paper you put on presents, I don't mean wrapping paper. I can't help but smile as I unwrap it.