Chapter 8

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--------------Flashback-------------------

"Destin are you sure you're okay?" Carter says full of worry. I lay back on the roof where we are sitting' this is our meeting place it's about 3 in the morning the night of my fathers death.

"I-I'm fine." I squeak out feeling tears sting my eyes. I can't cry in front of her I'm supposed to be strong.

"Destin Elliot Collins it's okay to be sad." She says using my full name. She grabs my hand and pulls me to her. I grab her around the waist and press out foreheads together the tears flowing freely from me eyes.

"I'm not okay Carter, I'm not. I can't take this. It hurts so bad. I don't know what to do." I finally say before crashing my lips to hers and holding her tightly. I pull away and rest my head in the crook of her neck nuzzling into it.

"Destin I can't see you like this. It hurts me. I promise you will be okay. He will always be looking down on you no matter what. He loves you Destin." She says softly. I can feel the tears falling from her eyes and onto me.

I just sit there in her embrace thinking how everything just came crashing down around me. "Carter promise me something?" I ask. I need to ask her this before she goes away. See she's moving back to Aussie tomorrow and this is the last time i'll see her for some time. It's sad how they're leaving the day after my dads death but they can't change plans now.

"What is it Destin?" She finally ask.

"Promise me when you move back you won't forget about me and fall in love with someone else. I love you with all my heart and I can't lose you. Please promise me you'll save yourself for me?" I say meaning every word I just said. I really do love her.

"Destin I promise I'll save myself for you. I love you." She says taking my hand and pinky swearing.

I begin to nuzzle into her neck again and I start kissing her neck then sucking and biting until pulling away looking at a successful hickey on her neck.

"That's a love bite." I say. "It means you're mine and no one else can have you no matter what." I finish triumphantly.

She does the same to me and then tells me I should go to bed. I climb down first the help her down. I walk her over to her house give her a kiss on the forehead. "Forever?" I whisper. "Forever." She whispers back. Then makes her way into her house.

---------------End Flashback-------------

Tears flowing from my eyes at the memory. That's the last time I ever saw her.

It's about 5 am and I'm up and in running gear because me and Carter used to wake up this early to run together. I haven't done this in ages but I need to.

I walk over to the mirror and look at myself. My brown hair is a disheveled mess, my eyes have purple bags under them, my eyes are glassy and red from crying and my scars are visible because of my short sleeved shirt and shorts. For the first time I realise how awful they actually look. They go from my wrist al the way to my shoulders on my arms and from my knees to my upper thigh on my legs.

Why have I done this?

No one will ever love me. I'm an ugly scarred mess. I'm disgusting. I think before pulling on my trainers, putting my earbuds in and jogging downstairs and out the door.

Once outside I begin running, feeling my chest burn and my legs moving as hard as possible I run as hard as I can. This clears my mind. Everything blurs and all I focus on is the path in front of me and pumping my legs harder and harder. I run until I reach my dads grave and I just sit there back against the tomb and catch my breath. I notice a familiar blonde girl running towards me.

Could it be? No way.....

She stops at the sight of me. It is Carter!

"Destin is that you?" She asks cocking her head at me causing her long once hair to bounce over her shoulder.

"Yep it's me the one and only." I say sadly. She studies me and I know she's seen them. She's seen my scars. I know this because her face falls and tears brim her eyes.

"Destin, w-what happe-ned?" She stutters trying to hold back tears. Look what I've done! I've made her cry. Just seeing her cry I feel my chest get tight and my eyes sting with tears.

I get up and pull her into a tight hug feeling sparks send shivers down my body.

"I-I did this to myself." I stutter out tears now flowing freely from my eyes.

"But why would you...." She trails off. I feel the tears running down her face and dripping onto my shoulder.

"I did this because I didn't know how to deal with pain Carter. I just-I-I'm so sad." I say full on sobbing now. "I've missed you, I miss dad, why does everyone leave me? I don't understand. Don't they know it hurts?" I say not understanding why everything had to hurt.

"I don't know Des, I really don't. But I go know I'm here now and you don't deserve this pain." She says before pulling away.

I lift my hand to her face wiping her tears and and I kiss her. I kiss her with all my hurt and pain and just kiss her as hard as possible. She begins kissing back. I lick her bottom lip asking for entrance and she lets me in. Now we are kissing passionately with tears rolling down our faces. It's like all the pain I'd felt was gone with that one kiss.

But then she pushes me away.

"I'm sorry Destin but-but- I can't do this. There's someone else." she says before turning and running from me.

I feel my entire world crash down around me again. I feel my heart shatter once again into a million pieces. Then I feel the rage. Someone else has touched my Carter! I swear if he's taken her innocence I'll kill him!

I feel like punching something or killing someone. Then everything goes blurry and I know it's gotten to be too much and now I've gone Ito a fit of rage.

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So Carters back. But it's not so happy now is it? ;)

-Hallie

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