horology | the darkling

burn

hi guys! am very sorry for the massive hiatus, I was in exam season and have literally just finished! thank you again for being patient. just as a quick explanation of what's actually happening to seraphina is that she has completely lost sight of who she is: she's been manipulated by Time, she's been told she's part of a prophecy in which she has to murder to gain power. She's just discovered that the more unhinged and delusional she becomes, the more she has access to her powers and now she's on the verge of completely allowing herself to lose control. She killed Irina just to prove that she could, to the Darkling because even though she claims that she doesn't care about him, deep down it's literally part of the reason she was born. She wants his approval but also thinks she's better than him. She makes Konstantin do it because she needs to feel that he is completely under her control and that he would do anything, even kill the love of his life, under her command. Essentially, she's establishing a dictatorship and she's committing heinous acts to show that she's not afraid. But she is, she's terrified that she'll have to live in her own mind forever. she also has a bit of a nostalgic moment in the chapter but u'll see why later 😏!

sorry that was a bit deep and convoluted but at least I promise that I'll do my best to update chapters! hope u enjoy anyways! also as a trigger warning, the end of this chapter is a bit messed up, I've tried to not go into detail about it but it's there xx

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villain - k/da

time to roll the dice
you know i'm the type
type to risk my life
not afraid to die

/

'rome wasn't built in a day but it burned in one' - john heywood

-

seraphina

Seraphina didn't wake up one day and became what she was. She never woke up and decided to be a murderer. Time had been in her mind, twisting her thoughts and manipulating her emotions, yes, but she had never made strong attempt to fight back against it. She just let it drown her, drag her down under the ignorant water of her emotions. Seraphina had tired, she had tried so hard, forced her emotions so much that it would take her days to feel anything. She missed being free, missed the feeling of being able to rebel against society, the feeling of her against the world. It was an indescribable bliss, to feel everything so deeply but yet care so little about what she did under society's watchful eye. She missed her archery lessons and her mother frowning on her for not being ladylike. She missed breaking into her father's studies and studying his war table. She missed the diagrams she drew of what troops she thought should go where. But above all, she missed the time she was first in love.

Seraphina was 16, too young to know what love was and certainly too young to make it last. There was a boy, Alexei, who used to graciously arrive with his father, a dear and close acquaintance of her own. Seraphina hadn't thought about Alexei in a long time, so long that she wondered if he was a figment of her imagination.

Both men were chatted over a glass of cold whiskey and would retreat into the room to discuss their strategies and reflect on politics: the Zemeni economy or Shu pirates or some other topics of the sort. Seraphina never really cared about the conversations, she just wanted to be around Alexei. He was a fog in her memory but she distinctly remember his grey eyes. Stormy grey as if he were holding back a hurricane inside his mind. Alexei was her best friend, her only friend and they would spend time together in the garden, sword fighting or simply bathing in the sunshine.