You're nothing but a monster…
I guess I kind of knew but I didn't want to believe it, it was Richy all along he's the one that's done all this. He's the one that's caused all this pain, he's the one that faked his own death right in front of my eyes. I have all these emotions swirling around in my head. I can't think straight. What has Richy done? He's caused so much pain and hurt the tears start to escape my eyes, my vision starting to blur. With my back against the wall I slide down hitting the cold hard floor. My mind went back to the fire and it kept replaying over and over again in my head. The tears started to fall thick and fast. I could no longer control my emotions. Have I really lost the love of my life? The man that came into my life asking me to help find his sister. Why is life so fucking unfair why couldn't it of been Richy that burned in that fire why did he have to be saved? Why is he allowed to live?
A few weeks had passed and I decided to drive to duskwood and meet with the group. I hadn't told them that Richy had sent me a visitation order. It took me a long time to decide what I wanted to do. I was still so angry with him for everything that he's done to me and the others. I could feel the anger rising up inside me. My grip on the steering wheel was turning my hands red. I hated Richy for everything. I couldn't find any way to forgive him. I don't think I ever can. There is just no going back from what he's done. After a few more hours of driving I reached the motel I booked into. I checked in and dumped my bags down in the room. It was pretty basic but it would suffice. After grabbing a shower and changing I grabbed my keys and visitation order and headed for the prison.
Everything inside me was telling me to turn around and not see him but I needed to go and hear why he wanted to see me. When I arrive at the prison, the walls around the prison are so high with barbed wire running along the tops of the walls. Walking towards the reception desk my hands start to feel clammy. My heart is racing like mad. What am I doing? Why the hell am I doing this? I take a moment to refocus and hand over my visitation order. The officer tells me to take everything out of my pockets and hand my bag over for inspection. I do as the officer says and hand my bag over and take my phone out of my pocket. A female officer comes over and runs a black metal scanner over my body.
She looks up at me and smiles "you are clear to go through, take this you will need it to get your things back once you are finished" she hands me a piece of paper with a number written on it. I thank her and move towards the visiting room. There are a few other people waiting in front of me waiting to go in and see their loved ones. Me on the other hand I was not waiting to go see a loved one I was waiting to go see the man that destroyed everything in my life. Not to mention what he's done to the group he's torn their life's apart and there is no fixing that. One of the officers opens the door for us to go in. I get shown to a seat and sit down. Leading on the table in front of me I start to feel the panic and frustration rise up inside of me.
I take a few deep breaths in and out and manage to calm myself down, just as I start to calm down the door on the other side of the room opens and prisoners spill out of the door all happy and excited to see their loved ones. I look up and see Richy walking towards me. He's wearing blue jeans and a grey jumper. He looked like he hadn't slept since he got here. As he got closer my heart started to beat really fast it felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. I couldn't bring myself to look at him as he sat down. I felt all the pain and hurt inside me coming to the surface. "Hi MC, thank you for coming to see me" I looked up at him, seeing his face right in front of me. Before I knew what I was doing I slapped him right across the face so hard he nearly fell off his chair.
One of the officers came over to ask if everything was okay, "it's fine no need for any fuss" Richy managed to send the officer away without any fuss. "I hate you Richy, I've never hated someone as much as you. How could you do that to us? Why did you make all those phone calls to me?" By this point the rage was rising in me and I couldn't stop it. "I'm so sorry MC I never meant to hurt you it wasn't all my fault I told you the reason why I did what I did to Hannah". Did he really just sit there and tell me it wasn't all his fault. "It is all your fault Richy you are to blame for everything that's happened. You are the one that set that fire and made me lose the love of my life. You are the one that's destroyed everything in my life. I hate you" the rage was at boiling point now and I launched myself at Richy and started to attack him.
I punched,slapped and kicked him as hard as I could before the officers came over and tried to pull me off him. "You deserve to rot here I never want to see you ever again" Richy looked at me with a sad expression on his face. "Please don't go MC, I never meant to hurt you please come back" I stopped at the door and turned around and walked back over to Richy. "You are nothing but a scumbag who's ripped apart his friends' lives and destroyed everything around them. You're nothing but a monster" I turned on my heels and rushed out of the room the tears started to flow. All I wanted to do was go home. I didn't want to stay here for another second.
As soon as I got back to the motel I picked up my bags and headed for the door, throwing everything in the back seat of the car I got in and put the key in to start the car. I calm myself down and think about going to see the others. I made a promise that I would meet up with them and intend to keep that promise. I wasn't going to let Richy ruin something else in my life.
A week later Richy sent me yet another order to go and see him. I wasn't going to go but I needed to get some kind of closure on what had happened. I wasn't ready to forgive him. I doubt I even could so I made my way back to the prison and did everything I did last time. I sat waiting for Richy to appear. A few moments later he sat down in front of me. "Thank you for coming MC" I looked at him. He looked even worse than the last time but I did attack him. "Why did you want to see me again? Don't you think you have caused enough damage in my life"
"I really am sorry for everything I should have just come to you and told you the truth, maybe things wouldn't have gotten as far as they did" was he really trying to look for sympathy after what he's done? "I can't forgive you Richy, I guess a part of me kind of wants to. I don't know" I saw the smile on his face for the first time. I felt like my walls were starting to break down around me. "I haven't told the others I've come to see you again, I guess we have a lot to work out"
We both sat and talked for an hour until it was time to go, I kept up the visits each time I would bring some stuff for Richy. He knew I could never forgive him for what happened with Jake. He knew he had messed up. He told me he would spend the rest of his life trying to make up for it.
6 months later I decided to move to duskwood Jessy helped me find an apartment not far from her. I spoke to my boss about working from home. It was a blessing that I was allowed to. I've been in my new place a couple weeks, I kept up my visits with Richy, we actually started to work through things and we were starting to become friends.
I closed my laptop after finishing work for the day, my thoughts drifting back to him. Was he even still alive? Had he really been killed in the fire. I go and grab the bottle of whiskey from the cupboard. Sitting down on the sofa looking out of the window I let all my emotions out. I really missed Jake. I didn't even know what he looked like and yet my heart aches for him to be with me.
I don't know how much time has passed. I could see the sun starting to come up. I had been in the same spot all night. I got knocked out of my thoughts by a knock at the door. I couldn't face anyone right now so I just ignored the knocking. Whoever it was at the door they weren't going away anytime soon so I pulled myself up off the sofa and went to answer the door. I was completely taken back by the figure standing in front of me. I somehow managed to move to one side and allowed him to come inside. "Is it really you? I thought I'd lost you in the fire" tears still rolling down my cheeks not knowing if this was real or just a dream. "It's really me MC"
I run towards Jake and wrap my arms around him, not letting go for a single second.
