your history's no mystery to me

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*"until your history's no mystery to me" is from "without you without them" :)

here's a sappy love poem just for shits and giggles LMAO i wrote this last night after listening to "without you without them" and "not strong enough" by boygenius which is a great queer band that makes me want to cry sometimes highly recommend <3 

this is also loosely inspired by achilles and patroclus bc they're the very definition of aching souls and yearning <33

---

i want to clutch the strings of destiny,

twist and pull the gold cords,

braiding our fates together

like how i weave your loose brown curls

into messy plaits

that come loose when we kiss

down by the lake

when the night drapes itself over us

and the earth cradles us in her ancient hands.

we are the last and the first people on earth.

your eyes fall on me and it's like i am being cut open and sewn back together and i am revealed and discovered and deemed a wonder—

in just one moment with you i have lived a hundred lives.

i fall apart in your hands

when you say that my soul is a jar of fireflies

and i want to tell you

that yours is the ocean all bright and brutal and illuminated by all the stars that have dived from the heavens just for you

and the depths are no mystery to me.

i can only breathe when i am drowning in you.

i can't speak these words into the thin, silky air,

the quiet that rests between us is almost reverent, almost holy, almost divine, always sacred,

sweet as serendipity.

i kiss your hand and say, "i love you" and somehow that's enough.

you know those three words

belong to you like your own name

ever since they left my lips and painted yours a swollen red

(your smile against my skin is like feeling my heart beating outside of my body,

how can my soul be sleeping on your cupid's bow?)

every time we say "i love you"

it feels like our own language

and no one has said anything like this

in history

and no one will ever love like us

when our bones thrum deep in the ground

and our souls are two halves of one star

lost, and trying to find each other

in a constellation

that keeps us apart—

our supernova

when our souls touch

would break the universe

(while 

     everything

                  is 

    in

  pieces,

we'll be whole amidst the chaos) 

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