A/N Wished by Pastelito_Fer. I hope you like it!
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WORDS: 1634
WARNINGS: Death and grief
[1] - You are the only family I have left
[17] - You are not alone, I promise
_____Grieving is something that feels weird when you experience it for the first time. The clenching of the heart deeply hurts inside of the own chest. Being on the brink of tears constantly and can't hold them back even if I want to. When you don't understand what is going on when you are little and when the feelings hit you years later when you finally know what happened during that time.
I lost someone before, grandparents reaching their final age, but I was young then. Old enough to realise that they were gone, but not wise enough that this means I will never see them again. Now I know the full consequences of someone dying far too well.
The decision not to accompany my family for the summer holiday was hard, but I had my internship to fulfil and not enough time to come on the road trip, so my mother, father and brother went alone. They explored nature during the different stops of the adventure and sent numerous pictures, almost making me feel like I am involved in this trip.
When they were supposed to come home, I wanted to wait for them, but it took longer and longer for them to return. The food I made was slowly getting cold and the sun settled more and more, making it dark in the living room. At first, I didn't think much about it, because the traffic can be harsh during the summer, but that none of them wrote me a message made me suspicious.
I tried to sleep for a bit but didn't manage to fall asleep properly and then the phone rang. My heartbeat was rapid, and I almost knew what was going to come when I picked up the call. Fingers shaking, lips trembling, I listened to the information from the lady on the other side of the line. She explained to me things about a car crash that happened, but I barely understood her.
It is hard for me to remember what else happened on that day. I went to the hospital like a robot controlled by someone else. Cried when they told me of the passing of beloved family members and held the hand of my mom who was still fighting. The loud sound from the machines sometimes still bothers me when it is silent around me.
Losing my family broke my world apart and I don't know how I managed my life during the following time. The funeral was organised by someone else since I couldn't bring myself to pick out flowers, music or coffins for them. I was like a ghost taking part in the ceremony and I left right after because I didn't want to speak with anyone about what happened.
Today is another hard day and I am not sure how I will handle it. The house is way too big for me alone and too expensive as well. I will not be able to pay all the bills, so I am selling the place which was like my harbour for all years of my life. The moving boxes are everywhere, and I am waiting for the company that will pick them up. I don't know how I managed to pack their things, but somehow and with many tears I collected everything and carefully packed things up.

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Formula 1 One-Shots (II)
FanfictionSecond book in one shot series. The cover is a drawing of mine. So, please don't copy it!