The Lonely Hearts Club

Chapter 34: Terror (Hades)

When I was a kid, my mom used to tell me that 'sorry' was just a word.

She said it doesn't mean anything unless you do things to prove you're remorseful.

She didn't take her own advice, but I'm trying to.

If Bree wants me to clean up after an animal, then I will.

"When's your next fight?" she asks after I finish sorting out the cat litter tray.

"Friday."

"I want to go." She says.

"I thought you wanted to go back to hibernating?"

She follows me as I walk to the sink.

"I changed my mind," She crosses her arms. "Apparently people are really excited about it, and I want to see what the big deal is."

I don't fucking want her to see.

"There's gonna be heaps of people, it'll be bad for your anxiety." I press down on the soap dispenser.

It's also strawberry scented.

"It's exposure therapy."

"Nah, you won't like it." I shrug.

"You don't know that, you don't know me." She meets my eyes in the bathroom mirror.

I know that she won't like it.

"It's violent." I say.

"Yeah, I guessed that."

I turn around to face her, bracing my arms behind me.

"You're still trying to get my forgiveness," she says. "So you're going to—"

Her home phone starts ringing.

She swears and races out to answer it.

"Yes, yes, I'm fine...I'm so sorry Lana....no you don't have to worry...I'm safe."

I don't want Bree to see me in the cage and I don't want her getting hurt in the crowds either.

Fuck.

She hangs up the phone as I walk into the living room.

"How are you even gonna get to the venue?" I ask her.

"You." She says. "You're going to drive me."

"Look Bree, I don't want you to see me when I'm—"

"Which is precisely why I want to go." She smiles. "Sometimes people do things you don't want them to do."

Right.

"Like what you did." She adds. "You think I wanted you to do that?"

Got me there.

Bree doesn't even know about it, but I'm also filled with guilt about what I did with Heather.

And, if she really wants to see me hurt people, then so be it.

"I'll have to pick you up early." I can't compromise my pre-match routine.

"I don't care." She trails closer to me.

"You're gonna see me differently." I try.

"I already see you differently." She says thoughtfully.

Got me there again.

"Is there anything you want me to do that will make it up to you?" I ask.

"You need to figure something out yourself." She says.