There's a hole in my heart nobody can see

Cause we try so hard to live, but just let go

  Last show today. I always try to give it everything I've got on stage, but last show is always a little bit more of a push. I am not ready to stop touring, however we are lucky enough to do a part 2 of the Trinity of Terror, and I am going to ask Case to come back with us. I want her to come back. I want to show her that I cannot stop thinking about her and I want her to be mine.

  During the wrap up party I had to find her and ask her to come back. I know I'll still see her at Ricky's but that's not enough for me. I wanted her all the time. I just didn't know if she wanted me. Besides that, she's a damn good crew member and knows her shit.

  I spotted her and that was my chance. I know she was busy talking to BVB but I couldn't wait any longer. I tapped her on the shoulder and grabbed her by the arm and swept her away from them.

  I asked her to come with us on Part 2 of the Trinity of Terror tour. Hoping she would say yes. She was hesitant at first but eventually agreed.

  After the party, most of us stayed on the tour bus, having too much to drink to drive. We all went our separate ways and went to bed. The next morning, I woke up with a headache. I rolled over to see Case's bunk empty and her things gone. She was already on her way home. I jumped in the shower and then gathered my things to head out, saying bye to the boys.

   On my way home, I got a call from Ricky. "Miss me already?" I spoke into my bluetooth speaker, laughing.

"Spencer.." He started to speak, very concerned and startled, not like him. "Gina is dead..." I was too stunned to speak.

  All I could say is "Where's Case?" Nervous that maybe she was injured too, or worse.

  "She's in the hospital..Spence..she found Gina when she went to to go pick up Marsh. Police told me it was a really gruesome scene and they found  Case sitting in her room, covered in blood. She made the 911 call. She's not hurt, just in distress and traumatized."

  Holy Shit. What was I hearing? "I'm on my way." Forget going home, I'm going straight to the hospital. When I got to the hospital, I found a nurse to take me to her room. She was sleeping, and Ricky was sitting next to her in what looked like a beat up white recliner. "Hey." I whispered walking into the room. We sat for a while and tried to wrap our heads around what just happened. "You want some coffee?" I asked Ricky. I needed to take a walk.

  "Sure, thanks." Ricky responded emotionless.  I walked out of the room still trying to figure out what the fuck just happened. I walked as fast as I could around the hospital until I could find the coffee and headed back. I didn't want to be away from her. When I got back to her room, I stood in the door frame noticing she was away and briefly talking to Ricky. She looked tired. Her face was pale and puffy, and she looked so exhausted. Some how in the middle of it all, she radiated with beauty.

  I sat down on the other side of the bed, as I handed Ricky his coffee. He said something to Case while standing up and nodded at me, signaling he was leaving the room. I held her hand and little conversation other than reassuring was spoken. A couple minutes went by and Chris appeared in the door way. She seems to perk up just a little bit when she saw him. I kissed her hand, signaling I was leaving and gave Chris a brief hug.

  As I made my way into the hallway of the hospital, I grew angry. Angry at who could possibly do this, especially to someone like Gina. Angry that Case is suffering, seeing the crime scene, and grieving for her best friend. I walked out to the lobby where all of our friends were rallied, and walked past all of them. I walked straight for the door and slid down a wall outside of the hospital. Ricky and Joe walk out and sit next to me. I'm just so furious, and I know they are too.

  We are in a band who writes songs about horror movies and I love slasher films. While these are just stories, we would never condone any of this, and it makes me sick there are people out there that would do something like this. I'm heartbroken for Casey. The guys didn't say anything to me. I didn't want details right now. Ricky had told me enough. He came out and informed us that she was being released and we should form a plan on what to do.

  We all decided we were going to spend the night and take shifts with her to make sure she was okay and felt safe. Ricky went to inform Case and within the next half hour she was going to be released. When the time came, Ricky wheeled her out and I helped him get her in the car, even though she could walk. I followed Ricky and Chris in my car with the rest of the band.

  When we got home Ricky and Chris ran and unlocked the door and ran inside to make sure things were ready. I was in charge of bringing Case inside. Even though she could walk, I carried her in the house and up the stairs. She nuzzled into my chest and for the first time today, she somewhat relaxed her body.

  I laid her down and helped her change out of her hospital gown, into a shirt. I covered her up and gave her a reassuring hand squeeze. I walked slowly towards the door and started to close it so she could sleep. As soon I started closing the door, I heard her ask me not to go. I sighed. A relieved sigh because it was killing me to leave her in that room. I opened the door back open, and walked back in, shutting the wood door behind me. I kicked off my shoes and shirt and crawled next to her in bed. It was driving me crazy not being able to tell her that I love her. It's not the appropriate time.

  After she drifted off to sleep, I soon followed, only to be awakened by a text message. It was about 9:00 PM at this point. We got back from the hospital at about 4:00 PM

It was from Ricky:
You good or do you want to switch shifts?
I'm good for now thanks man, she fast asleep. I typed looking over at her in the tv light, getting some sort of peace in her sleep.
You're not going to give up your shift are you? That made me laugh, quietly, trying not to wake her up. I could hear the guys watching movies downstairs.
Alright man, holler if you need anything.

  I felt her shift and flinch a little bit and whimpering, assuming she was having a nightmare. I put my phone down, rolling over pulling her closer to me. I could feel the wetness of her tears against my chest. I stroked her hair and sang to her until she, and I fell asleep.
"Like a river flows
Surely to the sea
Darling, so it goes
Some things are meant to be
Take my hand, take my whole life, too
For I can't help falling in love with you"