||Lungs of roses|| Hanihaki Au | Shin Soukoku | Bungou Stray Dogs

Atsushi's Visit (10)

"Shit! A-Are you okay?" That was a stupid question.

Chuuya startled Atsushi when he handed Akutagawa an emesis bag from behind him. "Here" Akutagawa took the bag from Chuuya's hand. He spat the remaining flower petals and blood into the bag.

"Earlier, you didn't tell me who it was. But, it's easy to figure out who it is."

Chuuya was in disbelief. Atsushi knew about it before he did?

"It's Dazai. You believe that Dazai still hasn't fully acknowledged your strength."

Akutagawa looked down at his bloodied hands as he listened.

"Forget that you hate me for just one second here. I know that it's not me that you want to hear this from..." Atsushi took a breath before he continued speaking. "Dazai has acknowledged your strength, that's why he paired us up. He didn't pair you up with me because he thought you needed help, it was because our strengths complement each other." There it was again. That smile that made Akutagawa melt inside.

That smile was dangerous. Everytime he got a glimpse of it, he'd be left coughing. And that's what happened. He coughed into the blue bag, adding to the blood and petals. Only one full flower head had fallen into the bag.

Atsushi realized he has to get used to this and not keep asking if he's okay. Akutagawa is very clearly not okay. Far from it.

Atsushi pulled out one of the bottles of water and handed it to the man. Reluctantly, he takes it. He attempts to open the bottle and fails.

"Do you need help?" Chuuya asks, he almost chuckles. It's not funny that Akutagawa is getting weaker but that he acts like a child when he needs something. Akutagawa nods as he hands the bottle to Chuuya. He covers his face as he does so, hiding the embarrassed blushing. Once Chuuya opened the bottle, he handed it back to the man.

Akutagawa slowly sips the water. He looks like he's thinking about something. He places the water on the over bed table before he grabs the notepad and pen.

"Thank you."

"Which one of us are you talking to?" Chuuya asks as he points at both himself and Atsushi.

Akutagawa hesitates before he answers.

"Both"

Atsushi is surprised that Akutagawa is thanking him. "Are you sure you're Akutagawa?"

"Shut up. I take it back" He shows the note with a death glare at the were-tiger.

"Heh" Atsushi nervously chuckles.

The man on the bed before he answered. "I'll be here until my life ends."

Atsushi's eyes widened at the statement. "You're just going to give up like that?!"

"Even if my Hanahaki ceases, my Tuberculosis will kill me."

Atsushi sits in silence for a minute or two before speaking. "Wouldn't curing the Hanahaki lengthen your life a bit?"

"My lungs are too damaged, and I have lost most of my strength and will not be able to gain any of that. The most that it will extend my life is most likely a little under 6 days. I can not recover."

Atsushi swallowed hard. "Wouldn't-" Atsushi had noticed it was quiet in the room. Atsushi turned around to check the room. It was empty, Chuuya and Gin had left somewhere. Atsuhi turned back to Akutagawa. "Wouldn't you like to spend your... last days somewhere beside a hospital."

"I can't. I can't go back to the Mafia and I have to reason to go anywhere else. I don't get attached to places like you do."

"Wouldn't you want to spend time with your sister?"

"Why are you so insistent on me living longer? Are you in love with me?" Akutagawa silently hoped that the answer was "Yes".

"Why would I be in love with you?!" There was his answer. "Besides, I just think that.... I don't know!"

"You're stupid Jinko. Saying things without thinking."

Atsushi lets out one sad, breathy laugh. "Yeah, I don't think about my words. That's a flaw I haven't tamed."

"Don't get sulky on me now. I'd much rather not have to deal with you before I die."

"Didn't you say that you wanted to kill me before you died?" Atsushi cared not what Akutagawa had written. The thought had just hit him.

"I don't have the strength to do so anymore so there's no point in talking about it anymore."

"I have a question."

"Your question better not be stupid."

"Was there or is there anything that you hoped to do or hoped to happen before you die? B-Besides Dazai's recognition." Atsushi spluttered.

Akutagawa had actually looked like he was thinking of a genuine answer to that question before carefully writing. It took Akutagawa an unnaturally long time to finish writing and show Atsushi the paper. Akutagawa didn't hold up the notepad like he had been doing the whole time, instead he handed the notepad to Atsushi with it facing down. Atsushi carefully clutched the notepad. He flipped the notepad over.

"I want the person I love to love me but he wouldn't like me."

"Why do you-" When Atsushi looked up, Akutagawa had rolled onto his side. It was like the previous night, he had turned away from him. It seemed like he did that when he was avoiding something.

"I'm going to go now, I don't want to bother you right now. If you want anything you can text." Atsushi picked up the notepad and pen, and began writing his number down before he felt a hand around his wrist. Akutagawa wasn't looking at him directly but it was clear that he wanted Atsushi to stay. "Do you... want me to stay..?" A slow nod from Akutagawa as he let go of Atsushi's wrist. 'Why would he want me to stay? Doesn't he hate me?' Atsushi thought to himself. "Okay, I'll stay."

Atsushi grabbed a chair and moved it next to the bed. Neither of them communicated. They sat in silence, a surprisingly comfortable silence. It was calming. It was enough to put the were-tiger to sleep, and it did.

(SRYY THAT IT'S LATE BUT I FINALLY FINISHED THIS CHAPTER RIGHT BEFORE MIDNIGHT. It still counts as a daily upload. I think...)