||Lungs of roses|| Hanihaki Au | Shin Soukoku | Bungou Stray Dogs

Breakdown (12)

A light, almost inaudible groan came from the man on the bed. A tap on the hospital bed was what had alerted Chuuya of Akutagawa's awakening. When Chuuya looked up from his phone, Ryuunosuke's eyes were watering.

"Are you crying?" Chuuya asked as he got up to comfort him.

Akutagawa raised his hand to his eyes, getting rid of the tears by wiping them away.

"Don't hide it. You're fine. It's just me here." Chuuya said as rubbed his back to comfort him. "And before you say anything, it doesn't make you weak. Crying is a normal thing because you're human." Chuuya could only wonder what caused this breakdown. He didn't want to ask and pressure Aku into answering.

Before Chuuya knew it, Ryuunosuke started silently sobbing. This was the most he had ever seen the man cry or express any form of emotion. It was a bit terrifying, if he was able to hide his emotions so well. What had been so bad that he couldn't hide it?

Before Chuuya could react Akutagawa was pulling him into an aggressive hug to comfort himself. This wasn't just crying. This was a full breakdown. He was hyperventilating, sobbing, pulling at his hair, unconsciously hurting himself.

"Akutagawa..." There was no response from the man, it was just crying. "Ryuu" Still nothing, he still wouldn't even acknowledge Chuuya's voice. "Ryuunosuke!" Chuuya yelled as he lifted the man's head to face him. He had finally acknowledged Chuuya. Chuuya snapped him out of the breakdown. "What happened? I know I said it was okay to cry but I need to know what the cause of this is."

Akutagawa let go of Chuuya, falling back to laying on his bed. He stared up at the ceiling for a few seconds before he rolled over onto his side again, away from Chuuya.

"No. No. No. You're not avoiding this." Chuuya said as he placed the notepad and pen in front of Akutagawa. "I'm getting answers dammit."

Akutagawa did nothing to answer.

Chuuya sighed, a bit frustrated. If Akutagawa didn't want to answer something, he probably wouldn't.

"I'm going to the store. Do you want anything?" Akutagawa shook his head. "I want- no, I need that fucking answer when I get back." Chuuya could see Akutagawa stiffening up a bit.

Chuuya left the room and went to the store.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

"I'm thinking of getting something for Akutagawa." Atsushi said as he led Dazai to the store. "Maybe you should get him a gift! Then he might actually believe that you acknowledge him, that you care."

"Atsushi. He won't make it either way." Dazai says, almost with no emotion.

Atsushi scrunches his nose. "I-I... I know." Atsushi turns to Dazai. "But he deserves to live longer. He has a sister, he wouldn't want to leave her so soon."

"You told me that he told you that he didn't care. If he wants to get rid of the pain, you should let him." Dazai says as he watches Atsushi avoid eye contact. "He's hurting, staying alive is hurting him."

Atsushi doesn't answer. He quietly walks.

Dazai doesn't make another attempt to speak.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Dazai and Atsushi arrive quietly at the store. They talk a bit as they pick out their supplies.

Finally, Dazai gets a glimpse of a familiar fiery red. When he looks in the direction of the red, he starts snickering.

"Hey Chuuya~" Dazai taunts the shorter man. When the man in question opened his mouth to fire back, he noticed the gloomy looking teen.

"Atsushi?" Chuuya questioned, ignoring Dazai's continued attempts to annoy him. "You okay?" Great, now both halves of Shin Soukoku were depressed. Chuuya could only hope that one of them could cheer the other one up.

"Just thinking about Akutagawa" The white haired boy said before he began blushing. "N-Not like that!" Chuuya was a bit confused on why the boy freaked out. He finally figured out why he did when he looked at Dazai who had been wiggling his eyebrows to insinuate something else.

Chuuya weakly punched Dazai. "Stop it."

"Fine~ Chibi is no fun." Dazai whined.

Chuuya's nose wrinkled at the nickname.

"What are you doing here Nakahara-san? Is Akutagawa okay?"

"You can just call me Chuuya and he's okay. I just came for some food and stuff." Chuuya said as he grabbed a few bottles of water.

"O-Okay... Chuuya...?" Atsushi never really uses anyone's first names so it was a bit unusual to him. "Do you know what kind of things Akutagawa likes? We want to get him a gift." Atsushi gestured to Dazai and himself.

Chuuya looked a bit confused but answered anyway. "He likes Classical literature, specifically Classical Chinese literature. You could get him a book." Chuuya pointed to a bookstore that was on the other side of the street.

Atsushi looked a bit surprised. "Classical Chinese literature? He actually reads stuff like that?"

"Yeah... I was surprised when he told me too."

"Is there anything else that he likes?"

Chuuya and Atsushi had actually been shopping while they were talking. The two had ended up in an aisle with tea. Chuuya glanced at the tea before speaking.

"He actually likes hot tea too," Chuuya pointed at the choices of tea. "I've seen him drinking a lot of Earl Grey and Jasmine tea."

"Honestly, the tea part does align with the book reading. It's not as big of a surprise." Atsushi said as he grabbed a box of Jasmine tea. "Dazai-" Atsushi turned around to talk to Dazai but he had disappeared somewhere. "I think we lost Dazai..." This wasn't at all new to Atsushi.

"Yeah.... We lost him a while ago, but it's better than him chatting away with his annoying voice."

"But he might get himself hurt!"

"I swear no matter how many times that man attempts suicide or gets hurt, he never dies. He's basically immortal." Chuuya said. No matter how many times Chuuya says that he wants Dazai to die, he's never meant it. Not once.

(I got another chapter out... yippee! Sorry i haven't updated, ive been caught up with school work and i got the big block for a while)