Letters From the Lost

~Noah~

Searching for the town was a bust. Jackson escaped me after I told him the news about Max. I searched almost the entire town and he was nowhere to be found. I knew Max needed me at home, so I went back home.

I couldn't help but feel distraught that I couldn't find Jackson anywhere. I walked in the door, "Max!" I called. Silence. Maybe she went to go find me. "Max?" I called again, still silent. I walked to the kitchen. That's when I saw her. Max laid on the ground in a pool of blood. "OH GOD!" I screamed. I rushed to her.

Max's body was limp, she wasn't moving. Her chest barely raised and lowered. I ripped my shirt and applied pressure to her stomach, there was a thin but deep cut in her stomach. I still had no idea what happened. But the sinking feeling in my stomach grew. I knew that it was Jackson that did this to her. It was my fault for not protecting her, I left her to defend herself against someone who had malicious anger against her already.

"Ch- Noah?" She stammered. Her voice was weak, she barely moved. She couldn't even open her eyes, my hands tightened around hers.

"Shh, save your energy. Stay awake, please," I begged. Tears streamed down my cheeks, I couldn't lose her. I couldn't lose the love of my life. It wasn't her time, she needed to stay alive. "I'm right here," I whispered. "I'm right here."

"In the closet...there's a b- box. Find it, please." Her voice was so faint. I held her hand tighter. Tears started streaming down my cheeks slowly.

"Okay, I will. But please baby, save your energy, I promise you'll be okay. Just stay awake, please," I begged. My voice cracked. "I'm right here, everything will be okay. You just have to stay awake."

"I- I- I lo- love y- you," She whispered. There was a quiet exhale then she stopped breathing. Oh, god, she stopped breathing.

"No, no, no, no, no, Max, no!" I pressed my fingers to the side of her neck and I couldn't find a pulse. I held my ear next to her nose and listened for breathing. There wasn't anything. I started panicking now. I started doing CPR.

I could hear the sound of her ribs cracking under the pressure of my hands. It felt like my heart wasn't even beating anymore. "MAX! WAKE UP!" I screamed. I leaned down, breathing two breaths over her mouth. "IT'S NOT YOUR TIME!!" I screamed again. She wouldn't wake up. Oh god, why won't she wake up?

I stopped doing chest compressions, I stood up and grabbed the phone. I quickly dialed 911, I set the phone down and started doing CPR again. She wasn't waking up, why wasn't she waking up? I heard a faint voice coming from the phone sitting next to me.

I picked the phone up and held it to my ear, "My girlfriend was attacked and she isn't breathing! I can't get her to wake up! Oh my god! She won't wake up!" I screamed.

"Okay, sir, do you know how to do CPR?" This wasn't going to help. Max wasn't going to wake up if I wasted time.

"I'm going to take her to the hospital myself," I said through my teeth. I dropped the phone and scooped Max in my arms. I ran out to the car and placed her body in the back seat. I rushed to the hospital, driving forty miles over the speed limit. I went as fast as I could. Max was only eighteen, she still had her entire life ahead of her. We still had our entire life to spend together. I couldn't lose Max now, I just got her. She needed to stay alive.

I finally pulled into the hospital, "Help!" I screamed. "She's not breathing! Help! Please!" A couple nurses and doctors rushed over with a gurney. They took Max and rolled her away. I watched, almost frozen. I could see what they were doing to her. I could see the Defibrillator. Why couldn't they get her to wake up? Why wasn't she waking up? She was so strong, she was going to survive, she needed to survive.

"Sir, I'm going to need you to go sit in the waiting room," A calm nurse said. She pointed toward a boring waiting room with bright fluorescent lights.

"Is she going to be okay? Please tell me she's going to be okay! She's only eighteen! Please," I had to hold in my tears. I couldn't break down in public. I couldn't break down, I had to stay strong for Max.

"I'll try my best to update you when I can. I don't know what's going on, but as soon as I find out, I will let you know." I nodded and walked to the waiting room. The fluorescents were blinding, giving me a headache. I just wanted Max to wake up. I just wanted to go home and be with Max forever and I wanted everything to be okay. I just wanted us to be okay, I wanted us to be together for the rest of our lives. We've barely had any time together, but we needed more.

She was just an eighteen year old girl. She was still so young. She still had so many years left, she still had so long to live. We just started loving each other. If she died, I would never forgive myself. I couldn't forgive myself knowing that it was my fault for not protecting her. I could have been there for her. Right now I would be telling her that I didn't care if that child wasn't mine, I would be there for her and I would help her raise them. I would be telling her that it wasn't her fault that Jackson attacked her a few months ago.