Supernova

Chapter One Hundred and Five - According to Plan

A/N: alright, this is a long one, but we finally get the resolution to all the bullshit i've been setting up for SO LONG. YAY!! and congratulations (and thank you, always!!) to everyone who's stuck with me this far, we can officially say goodbye to the betrayal arc <3 

A few horribly desperate sobs came before I was able to say anything else, but if that was the last chance I was ever going to have, I was determined to finish the damn speech. Elias didn't say anything else, but he did look rather frantic and stressed in his silence as he began patting at my face with the fabric he'd pulled out of his pocket.

I pushed him off. Subtly. Then I took a breath and cleared my throat.

"I'll be the first to admit, I didn't think much of this school when I first showed up," I told them all. I tried to laugh, like it was a joke, but it came out sounding horribly sad. I would have been embarrassed if I had it in me to care. "But now I can confidently say that this is not only the best hero school in the world, but my personal favourite."

Was that pushing it? Maybe. Did I care? Absolutely not.

I still couldn't see anyone. It was partially the blurriness, partially the fact that I just couldn't look up to face what I might see in anyone's expression. I could feel the pity and confusion from here; I didn't need to see it. And I didn't need to see anything that might make everything I needed to say entirely impossible.

"I have learned more about being a hero in my six months being here than I have over my entire career," I said honestly. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to focus on the sound of my breath and the comforting lack of footsteps in the room. "And I've learned even more about being a friend and a good partner."

I thought I would hear snickers at that, considering my poor acts as of late, but the room was still near silent except for our breathing, mine being the loudest.

"For that, I thank you." I opened my eyes a little. I was already facing towards the floor, but I gave myself enough vision to lean forward into a customary bow. "And I hope you know I really did love you."

Those words felt like they scratched my throat and tongue on their way out. I opened my eyes and returned to standing. From the slightest glance I allowed myself, I could see that he still wasn't looking at me. I had no idea whether he didn't know I was taking this last chance to reach out to him, or if he just didn't care.

"All of you," I said, both honestly and for the benefit of the bracelet. "I'm going to remember all of you for the rest of my life, and I'll carry you all with me into this next chapter of my life."

My tears subsided. Enough to see between them. Momo was crying too. She was trying desperately hard to make it seem like she wasn't, but I could see she was. It was fucking awful, but she was the only person I could stand to look at.

"Thank you," I said again. "For everything."

That time, it was less so a we lost and more so an honest statement.

"Oh, my love," Elias said softly beside me, leaning over to wipe more tears away, still catering to me like the attentive husband he was. He gave me a soft smile before turning back to the rest of the room. "There's nothing I can say that quite follows that, is there?"

He laughed timidly, like this was a carefully polite joke.

"I really do thank you all for everything you've done for my wife," he said, turning back to me. "Please know I'll take good care of her."

He was smiling, and I did my best to return it. I could tell that he, like the idiot he was, entirely incapable of reading the room, was about to kiss me. I dreaded it. But there was nothing else I could really do. I tried to just keep silent and still, so I could wait for it to be over, because what good would putting an act on at this point do?