Ruins of Autumn

14• ...Leonora!

•Over two years before the prologue•

   
   

    When we're kids, the adults who are part of our lives take advantage of the lack of experience that we have in living, the fact that they were born before us (as if that were just their merit), and the knowledge that they have acquired.

    They spin us through their fingers, as they wish, without thinking for too long that it's not always going to be such a time. We won't remain forever just some naive children who are not informed enough about the way life works.
 
    We believe what they tell us to believe, and we stay away from people they order us to stay away from. We live by the rules that they tell us are the right ones, and we agree that we shouldn't ask for further explanation.
 
    Then, something that the adults cannot control, no matter how hard they try, happens: time passes, and we are given the opportunity to grow too. The knowledge opens our eyes, the experience through the unusual events and the mistakes makes us more prudent and smart enough to distinguish who is truly the enemy that we have to fight, and according to their point of view, we have changed from wise and kind children into selfish and arrogant young people, that assume we know everything, because we don't want to live any longer imprisoned under the chains of the slavery placed around our necks by them with the argument that those chains are to protect us and not kill us, like we feel they are. We don't want to live in the slavery of the closed mindset, like they have lived, but we want to fight for true freedom.
 
    The real enemies are shocked at how we managed to break the chains from which they themselves didn't escape because they preferred to remain slaves in the comfort zone created by previous generations, and they want us to suffer the same fate.
 
    We are strong because we know. We admit it when we're wrong and are grateful for the opportunity to change. We are not afraid to hold accountable the real culprits for the injustices that they have done against us, and we are aware that, when it comes to helping those who need us, we know that one of those people who must be helped and not neglected is us.
 
    Blerim Agolli had been waiting for someone to talk with him and tell him the truth, to make sure that he wouldn't be a problem for them, to convince him to stay quiet, and maybe even invite him to be a part of them since they unwillingly included him in the work they did, but nothing had happened.
 
    As if ruining their plans wasn't enough, he had also left a job unfinished.
 
    He was scheduled to be released from prison the next day, but since that day was his birthday, he used as an argument the implementation of all the rules required for a prisoner and was released early in the morning of November 3rd.
 
    Denada had given him her home address, work address, and phone number just in case, and Albioni had often visited him in prison. The latter was married at the end of November two years ago and had the same job as a driver for some people who worked on the crime side.
 
    His thirty-two-year-old cousin, with her black hair tied behind her head in a dark blue clip and wearing a white shirt, jeans, and black heels, got up right away from the chair behind the desk, surprised and happy, when he knocked on the door of her office with blue walls and pictures of landscapes of different countries around the world.
 
    "I thought you were getting out tomorrow." She walked beside the black chair, in front of the brown table, to greet him.
 
    "I can go back if you want and tell them to get me out tomorrow."
 
    "No, no." Denada hugged him tightly.
 
    Blerimi smiled at her hospitality and returned the hug.
 
    He felt terribly sorry for her when he thought of how much of a void Xhuliana's loss had left in her life too, how guilty she felt, and that perhaps if she had been more supportive of her best friend, Xhuliana wouldn't have committed suicide. If she had been more attentive to the way Amarildo behaved with Xhuliana, she would have noticed that something was wrong with Anila's brother, and she would have warned her cousin to stay away from him.
 
    He understood that Denada was trying to lift the burden of that guilt on herself by being next to him and somewhat reducing the feeling of missing his older sister in his life, and he accepted her support so that they could help each other. He took advantage, too, of the fact that Denada had spent much time with Xhuliana, and it felt as if through the memories that she had with her, his good sister had still left a part of her in his life.
 
    He had wanted to tell her that he had partially avenged Xhuliana and would continue to carry on with the plan to the end, but the suspicion that his cousin would find out something not in his favour about Anila and instantly turn her back on Blerimi because he knew that Denada would never approve of the crime that had been done to her, even if Amarildo's sister had been guilty as well, had forced him to remain silent. Let it be comforting for some time the fact that Amarildo would no longer be able to enjoy life like he had before after taking Xhuliana from them.
 
    "I'm glad you're finally free, and happy birthday!" Denada congratulated him with her two hands placed on his arms while looking at him, smiling.
 
    "Thanks for both," he said.
 
    "We're going out tonight, aren't we? To celebrate."
 
    "Sure." Blerimi needed to visit as many new places as he could to leave the time spent in prison behind as soon as possible.
 
    "OK, then. What do you want to do now? I thought I'd leave work for today; we'd go to my house, so you could rest a bit, and then we'd go out. I don't think you have eaten anything today."
 
    "You don't have to. I can go home by myself. I'll wait for you there."
 
    "Of course I do." Denada tilted her head. "Let's go out right away. I just have to make a phone call for today, and then we can leave."
 
    "OK."
 
    She approached the windows while looking through her phone contacts for the number of the person she wanted to talk to and put the phone in her left ear.
 
    When Blerimi heard the glass door of the office open, he immediately looked back and stared deeply at the beauteous woman who had just entered.
 
    Mesmerised by the alluring energy of the stranger, the pale maple with bright cinnamon colour of her eyes, her dark red hair pinned behind her head with a few strands left around her oval-shaped, smooth beige-pink face, he felt embraced by the love spread in every cell for her, a feeling that made him think that his soul already knew her in an abstractive way, and now he only needed to know who she was concretely.
 
    He thought for sure that it was impossible for such perfection to have been created out of the blue, except by God, whose existence he had never believed in before, until those moments when it seemed to Blerimi as if he had been given totally convincing proof.
 
    He was about to put his hand on fire at the look of the stranger, that she was experiencing the same feelings as he was for her. It was as if a fragile emotion of love had awakened from sleep as soon as they had met each other's eyes; it had always been within them, but it had waited for the right moment to reveal its presence.
 
    Leonora was staring at him in utter amazement that someone she had only imagined could give her the feeling of meeting the right person was standing in front of her, dressed in black, with bronze-amber eyes, black short hair, and a light sand-coloured face in a slightly elongated oval shape.
 
    That perfection existed. He wasn't a book character without flaws, which she could only have in her thoughts. He was real, and he was right in front of her. He was looking at her; he knew that she existed, and he seemed to like her.
 
    They both immediately looked at Denada with her back to them as she continued to talk to someone on the phone, trying to stop that raging heat like a knot in the middle of their chests that had constricted their throats and set their hearts on fire.
 
    "Good afternoon." Leonora thought it was necessary to greet in order not to leave the impression of a rude person with her eyes fixed on her boss, but her attention was completely focused on the stranger, about whom she wanted to know everything she could.
 
    "Good afternoon." Blerimi also used politeness as an excuse to return the greeting and looked at her intensely so that she could understand his gaze.
 
    "Nora," Denada turned off the phone, put it in the pocket of her black jeans, and approached them with excited black eyes. "Could you come OK?"
 
    "Yes," she replied softly.
 
    "Do you two know each other?" Denada doubted that they didn't, and they looked at each other, trying to be recognised this time.
 
    From the question of the woman in the same room with them, they were realising that they should have met before, but the circumstances had come in such a way that they were being introduced at that travel agency.
 
    "No," Blerimi was worried about finding out that they were related by blood.
 
    "This is Leonora, Albioni's wife." The introduction of her cousin wiped the happiness off his face, and his heart slowed to a panicked beat.
 
    "Which Albioni?" he asked harshly, not having the courage to look at the so-called Leonora like before.
 
    "Albion Huba, your friend."
 
    Blerimi's eyes went rapidly to the wedding ring on Leonora's left hand, and he blamed himself for not noticing it before. Dazzled by the feeling of love for her, as soon as he had seen her, he hadn't even thought about wondering if maybe she could belong to someone else. Her look, as if Leonora loved him in the same way, had put to sleep the suspicion of such an obstacle. 
 
    An unbreakable chain was placed around his heart, and it mercilessly squeezed the latter until it bled as he gazed sadly at the forbidden woman, unable to show her the uniquely positive emotion he had felt because of her, and Leonora, shocked like him, also tried to hide the disappointment in her sad eyes.
 
    He reminded himself relentlessly that he was standing in front of his close friend's wife as he shook her hand and looked at her seemingly neutrally.
 
    "How are you, Leonora?"
 
    "Very well," she lightly squeezed his warm hand, which perfectly complemented hers, and smiled at him with a look, a gesture that faded Blerimi's neutral glance and lowered his barriers just for a second, so that he could tell her with a deep gaze that he felt like there was something between them, something that was making him imagine as if she wasn't Albioni's wife, they had both met for the first time elsewhere together, had the same feeling as when they had met a few moments ago, and had the chance to get to know each other more closely.
 
    He understood her stare without any difficulty and that she was experiencing the same feelings; his imagination took its course and raised his hope for her. Maybe she didn't love Albioni and was going to break up with him?
 
    He tried to immediately erase that absurd hypothesis from his mind and convince himself that what he suspected was not true. It was all a figment of his mind, because that was how he wanted reality to be.
 
    But that reality was different, and Blerimi had to accept it if he didn't want to end up suffering the consequences if he chose the opposite path.
 
    She was Albioni's wife. He was his friend, and the end of it all was that, between Blerimi and Leonora, nothing could ever happen. Moreover, he was probably misunderstanding everything. Perhaps she was just being nice to him, since the twenty-nine-year-old was an acquaintance of her husband. In another situation, she wouldn't have even looked at him.
 
    He had to get out of there before he started fantasising about forbidden things about the two of them, and he had to keep the feelings of that moment under control. He was feeling powerless to do something like that with Leonora in front of his eyes.
 
    "Ready to go?" he asked Denada.
 
    "Yes," Denada answered, and she turned to the table to get her bag next to the black chair at its head, leaving the two of them alone next to each other, fighting the strong desire to look at each other again.
 
    "Nora, you will close the office for today." Her boss put a blue folder on the black shelf with the work documents to the left of the room from Leonora's point of view.
 
    "OK," she obeyed in a soft voice and stepped more to the left to let them both leave the office.
 
    Guilty of having wrong actions and thoughts in her mind, she gazed at his hands, his back, and his bold, seductive facial features. When she thought that his eyes had looked at her, as if he too had felt love at first sight for her, it became even more difficult for Leonora not to consider that feeling within herself.
 
    "See you, Nora." Denada smiled at her and, along with Blerimi, who didn't look at her anymore, headed for the exit.
 
    Leonora wanted to look at him one more time, but she forced herself to give up on that daydream.
 
    It didn't matter how winsome he was, that he seemed like her type, that he seemed to have a very beautiful way of looking at life that she was desperately interested in discovering, and that it was worth it without a doubt to fall prey to his lure. It didn't matter if Blerimi probably really liked her, as his look had expressed.
 
    He was Albioni's friend, and he would never choose her over his friendship with her husband.
 
    So Leonora had to give up on the idea that one day they could be together while there was still time to avoid the war that would be caused for that wish to come true.