You Do Love Me, Don't You?

Chapter 62 · Thing

Lilly's POV:

I was terrified to know what Nick's 'thing' was. If I couldn't do it for Andy, how could I do it for Nick?

So I laid in bed, waiting, as he slept beside me. I stayed silent. Didn't move. There's no way I'm going to wake him up and speed up the process of him leaving me too.

No. That's silly. Nick and Andy are very different. And maybe Andy will come back.

Okay, calm down. That's silly too.

I felt Nick start to stir and my heart sank. I slowly pulled the blanket over my head and buried myself into the bed to buy myself some more time.

"Good morning beautiful."

Darn it. Damn it. Whatever.

He pulled the blanket back and moved closer to place a kiss on my forehead. As we locked eyes, his eyebrows drew together and a look of confusion took over his pretty face.

"What's wrong?" Nick propped himself up and pulled me towards him. I sighed, feeling myself relax against my will as I nuzzled against his chest. "Talk to daddy."

What to say, what to say...

"What's your 'thing?'" I asked, looking up at him through my eyelashes. His eyes furrowed and his mouth opened, but I cut him off before he asked. "Your 'thing.' Micha had his thing. Andy had his thing..."

Nick pulled my head back to his chest. "It's nothing extreme, beautiful, and it is not that important."

"It's not?" I pulled away, giving him a confused look.

"You mean the entire world to me. Nothing, ever, will change that. Understand?"

Tears threatened to spill out of my eyes as I nodded.

"Words, please, beautiful."

"Yes daddy." I mumbled before pulling his face to me and placing a passionate kiss on his lips.

"What was that for?" He asked, a smile covering the entirety of his face.

"I needed it."

I laid back down on his chest, and we stayed like that for a little while, before I realized he never answered my question.

"Daddy?"

"Yes beautiful?"

"You never told me what your 'thing' was..."

He was quiet for a moment before he answered. "Let's eat breakfast, and then I'll tell you all about it. Sound good?"

"Sounds great."

Nick led us into the kitchen, and, after telling me to sit at the counter, began to make us food. He cooked up some bacon, eggs, and toast, and we called that good.

I finished quickly, trying to get straight to the point, but he took his time, clearly dreading the topic. Which just scared me more.

Finally, we were clearing plates away, and I was offering to help clean the dishes.

"No, beautiful, please go wait on the couch for me."

And so I did. All by myself. Bouncing my leg. Picking at my fingers. Biting my nails. What will happen if this goes bad? Will I lose Micha too? A majority rules kinda thing?

Nick came in a few seconds later, putting my thoughts on hold. He got comfortable in the big arm chair before he tapped his leg. "Come here."

I did as I was told, swaying a bit when I got up too fast. I stopped in front of his legs, not sure if he wanted me on his lap or at his feet. But that was soon answered when Nick grabbed my waist and positioned me to straddle him.

"Alright beautiful. Just remember that you are so important to me. Nothing is going to change that, okay?"

"Yes daddy."

Scared. So scared.

What's the worst that could happen?

You already know that answer.

"Well... my thing... it's called DDLG. It stands for daddy dom, little girl. It..." He hesitated. "It means that I am your daddy and I will take care of you, and you are my little, and you..." He sighed. "You let me care for you. You regress into little space and be vulnerable and let me cuddle you and coddle you. But I also put you in timeout or give you spankings if you're bad. This isn't necessarily the sex part of our relationship, it's just a different dynamic I guess. I like caring for people and I like these kinds of subs because they're so soft and needy and... I love it."

Nick took a deep breath, his eyes avoiding mine. I put my hands on both sides of his face, and pulled him toward me for a reassuring kiss.

That was nothing to be scared of.

"Little... so like feeling small?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.

"Yes... Michael said that while you were with him you regressed, you felt small." I nodded my head. "So, all I'm really asking of you right now is to trust me, submit to me, and let me help you to regress. If you don't like it then that's fine."

"But, from what you've said, I already have? So all you want is to..." I trailed off. He just wants to help me and be daddy? He already does.

"Well, there's also some accessories I want you to try. "

This made me nervous. "Like...?"

"Like, for starters, I want you to be drinking out of a sippy cup today." He paused, waiting for me to object, but I just nodded. "And there's pacifiers, teethers, bottles... just so much. There's also diapers and pull ups, but I'm not as into that. But it's totally up to you. Whatever you're comfortable with."

"So... you just want to treat me like a baby?"  I'm not sure if I'm against that or not. I mean, it's not bad at all, but I am grown. For the most part. So shouldn't all that either be behind me or my job?

"Yes. I want to help you to relax and let everything go. People who regress find that when they let go all the way, they turn back to the simplest times to be comfortable. It's also a coping mechanism for a lot of people, so if this is something you're into I can teach you and you can use it-"

I cut him off with a kiss. He was rambling, and he's told me everything I need to know, and it's time to just do it.

"So... do you already have this stuff?"

"Eager to try it, huh?" Nick teased, giving me a small kiss on the nose.

"Mhm..." I hummed, bouncing a bit in his lap as he stood both of us up, letting me walk behind him as he led me to the bedroom. He grabbed his suitcase and pulled a small bag out of it.

Ohh... it's a diaper bag. Hahah.

He handed the bag over and let me look. There was a disney princess sippy cup that I took out, a few pacifiers, but I chose one that had a little tiara on it, and there was an adorable pink stuffed elephant, along with a matching blanket.

A huge smile overtook my face as I snatched my new cuddle buddy from the bag. I turned to Nick, who was smiling down at me with my pacifier in one hand, and blanket in the other.

And just like that, the little switch flipped, and I felt so small.