Capturing The Ice Queen's Heart

Chapter 29

Chapter 29

In Love

I used the back door and went out hurriedly to get some air. My breath hitched and my knees were trembling so badly. Tuloy-tuloy ang lakad ko papunta sa parking lot kung saan walang tao.

Did I hear it right? Triton was in love with me?! It was real, right? He couldn't be joking right now 'cause damn I'd never forgive him for playing with my feelings!

"Isla! Isla, please hear me out!"

Hinawakan ko ang dibdib ko at maingat na sumandal sa isa sa mga sasakyan doon. I didn't realize that he had followed me. I didn't even know if I could talk to him properly or if I would just stare at him tongue-tied.

"Please, Isla. I didn't mean to scare you away..." he said frustratingly when he was finally near me.

I calmly looked at him. Dahan-dahan naman siyang lumapit na tila natatakot sa magiging reaksyon ko ngayong nagka-harap na kami. At sa tingin ko'y ibinigay niya ang buong bigat niya sa nasandalang sasakyan sapagkat nanghihina siya.

"Triton, I'm not scared. Na-shocked lang ako. I wasn't expecting that you'd say something like that in front of everyone. And that was too much to process, so I walked out..." pati ako ay frustrated na rin.

"I know, Isla. I said the right words at the wrong time because I couldn't take it anymore. Pakiramdam ko ay sasabog ako kapag pinigilan ko pa ang sarili ko—" Pumikit siya ng mariin. "I'm the scared one... Please listen to me first. You don't have to say anything, but I won't hold back now."

He rubbed his hands against his face and took a deep breath. Tumingala siya at nagsusumamong tumingin sa akin. He took a few steps, so we could be closer.

"I told myself before that I'll confess at the right time... at the right place. But I didn't see this coming, Isla. Ang choice ko na lang ngayon ay aminin ang totoong nararamdaman ko." He pointed to the restaurant. "Walang halong kasinungalingan lahat ng sinabi ko sa loob. Mahal kita—noon pa at mas lalong lumalalim sa bawat araw na kasama kita."

The lampposts were not that far from us and I could clearly see the mists in the corners of his eyes. Ang hirap pigilan ng sarili na huwag mag-react dahil iba pa rin 'yung pakiramdam nang inulit 'yon ng mas malakas at mas malinaw—'yung kaming dalawa lang at walang nakaka-alam.

"Oo attracted na ako sa 'yo noon. And I genuinely wanted to be your friend. But I didn't mean to fall in love with you; it just happened one day. Ito ang unang beses na nakaramdam ako ng ganito and I knew that I should be responsible for my feelings. Ilang beses kong pinag-isipan hanggang sa nakumpirma ko na hindi na simpleng crush ang nararamdaman ko. Ilang beses kong pinigilan ang sarili ko kasi ayaw kong masira 'yung friendship natin at ayaw kong isipin mo na nag-ti-take advantage ako sa 'yo. Natatakot ako na baka mag-iba ang tingin mo at lumayo ang loob mo sa akin... Hindi ko kaya, Isla. Hindi ko kaya na maging back to zero tayo lalo na at ibinigay mo na ang tiwala mo sa 'kin at marami na tayong pinagsamahan. Iniisip ko pa lang nalulungkot na ako..."

Suminghap siya at itinuro ang kaliwang dibdib. "Pero mas nalulungkot ako kapag nakikita kitang masaya kasama ang ibang lalaki kahit na mga kaibigan mo rin naman sila. Nalulungkot ako kasi kaibigan mo rin ako at wala akong magawa kundi ang hayaan ka. Una sa lahat wala akong karapatan na diktahan ka sa mga gusto mong gawin o makasama. But Liam came... You were laughing at his jokes the way I made you laugh when you were feeling down. You two were so close that I couldn't look anymore. I desperately wanted to yell at him for kissing you at the airport before he left. And here comes Wesley... He danced with you and I wish I didn't hear their comments that you two would make a good couple. I've never felt so jealous and insecure in my life... At alam kong magagalit ang papa ko sa 'kin, pero hiniling ko na sana nasa maayos kaming kalagayan para hindi ka na mahirap abutin. Isla, you're unreachable for me, and for once I felt terrified of what my future holds because I want to give you every single thing you deserve."